Some people believe that competition drives young athletes to perform at their best, while others believe that competition discourages those who are not athletically talented from participating in organized sports.
Write a response in which you discuss which view more closely aligns with your own and explain your reasoning for your position. In developing and supporting your position, be sure to address both views presented.
The statement claims that competition plays two roles on Two different athletes; one as a catalyst to draw out young athlete potential, and the other one as a deterrent for not athletically talented athletes. Both beliefs are not inaccurate, but the performance of each athlete depends on various influences such as the capability, personality, passion, and, including, the environment of the athlete.
The first statement indicates that a competitive environment is vital to be excel in athletics for young athletes. This statement is true for young athletes that also have the capabilities and passion for the sport and have the opportunity to compete with other talented competitors. This way, the athletes will tend to practice more to gain an inferior position in the competition, which is the cause of the improvement in performance. On the contrary, the young athletes that do not have the passion or the capability in the sport that they are competing, then, the inclination to practice will be less thus in lower performance causing the first statement to be false.
The second statement states that a competitive environment is discouraging the untalented athletes from participating in organized sports. This statement is correct under the circumstance that the athlete is both not athletically talented and uncompetitive which might be the result from the lack of interest in practicing or might be from losing to other competitors in previous competitions. However, not all untalented athletes will be discouraged by the fact that they are not talented. Many athletes that are successful do not claim that their success from talent alone but also from the practice they made in the past. Which means that the untalented athlete that is practice enough to gain the confidence will not be discouraged to participate in the competition.
In conclusion, the statements mentioned above are both correct and incorrect. Competition might or might not be one of the influences that drive athletes to practice to perform their best in a competition. On the other hand, it might or might not be seen as a formidable foe that many untalented athletes who might or might not want to compete in a competition.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 57, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...aims that competition plays two roles on Two different athletes; one as a catalys...
^^
Line 5, column 627, Rule ID: SENTENCE_FRAGMENT[1]
Message: “Which” at the beginning of a sentence requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
...rom the practice they made in the past. Which means that the untalented athlete that ...
^^^^^
Line 7, column 158, Rule ID: ADMIT_ENJOY_VB[1]
Message: This verb is used with the gerund form: 'practice performing'.
Suggestion: practice performing
...f the influences that drive athletes to practice to perform their best in a competition. On the oth...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, first, however, if, second, so, then, thus, in conclusion, such as, on the contrary, on the other hand
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 21.0 19.5258426966 108% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 12.0 12.4196629213 97% => OK
Conjunction : 12.0 14.8657303371 81% => OK
Relative clauses : 18.0 11.3162921348 159% => OK
Pronoun: 23.0 33.0505617978 70% => OK
Preposition: 46.0 58.6224719101 78% => OK
Nominalization: 23.0 12.9106741573 178% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1863.0 2235.4752809 83% => OK
No of words: 358.0 442.535393258 81% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.20391061453 5.05705443957 103% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.34981470047 4.55969084622 95% => OK
Word Length SD: 3.10940029799 2.79657885939 111% => OK
Unique words: 152.0 215.323595506 71% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.424581005587 0.4932671777 86% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 589.5 704.065955056 84% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.59117977528 101% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 4.0 6.24550561798 64% => OK
Article: 8.0 4.99550561798 160% => OK
Subordination: 0.0 3.10617977528 0% => More adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 2.0 1.77640449438 113% => OK
Preposition: 3.0 4.38483146067 68% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 14.0 20.2370786517 69% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 25.0 23.0359550562 109% => OK
Sentence length SD: 48.8195343974 60.3974514979 81% => OK
Chars per sentence: 133.071428571 118.986275619 112% => OK
Words per sentence: 25.5714285714 23.4991977007 109% => OK
Discourse Markers: 8.07142857143 5.21951772744 155% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.97078651685 80% => OK
Language errors: 3.0 7.80617977528 38% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 8.0 10.2758426966 78% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 5.0 5.13820224719 97% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 1.0 4.83258426966 21% => More facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.283873671662 0.243740707755 116% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.119115102255 0.0831039109588 143% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0688302750302 0.0758088955206 91% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.18011344776 0.150359130593 120% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0530528648888 0.0667264976115 80% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 15.8 14.1392134831 112% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 46.1 48.8420337079 94% => OK
smog_index: 11.2 7.92365168539 141% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 13.0 12.1743820225 107% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 13.18 12.1639044944 108% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.27 8.38706741573 99% => OK
difficult_words: 77.0 100.480337079 77% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 15.5 11.8971910112 130% => OK
gunning_fog: 12.0 11.2143820225 107% => OK
text_standard: 16.0 11.7820224719 136% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5/6 paragraphs with 3/4 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: reason 4. address both of the views presented for reason 4 (optional)
para 6: conclusion.
Rates: 58.33 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.5 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.