Nowadays celebrities are more famous for their glamour and wealth than for their achievements and this sets a bad example to young people. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?
There is a phenomenon in which more and more celebrities are striving to become popular by indicating their wealth. While some argue that the situation is innocuous, others believe that these people could generate negative influences on children. From my point of view, I agree with the latter statement that celebrities, who are well-known solely by their luxurious lives, would be wrong models for youngsters to look up.
On the one hand, there are several clear benefits created by affluent role models. One of those positive impacts would be the encouragement for the next generation to work diligently. As successful patterns could certainly illustrate their living standards are significantly more advanced, pupils could have the respective motive that if they try harder, they could probably obtain the same pinnacle as their idols. Besides, famous people can also establish numerous innovative and healthy entertainment thus could assist to reduce the criminal rate of a particular locale. That is because when people relax and have definite approaches to manage their leisure time, they are more likely to avoid a variety of social vices such as drugs, prostitution or gambling. In other words, in specific circumstances, the mentioned phenomena could be beneficial to teenagers.
On the other hand, apart from the above cases, overusing money as a mean to spread one's fame tends to cause more harm than good. Property is, as it always, a true symbol for materialism. Meaning that if students admire their models mostly because of their opulent lifestyle and assets, they would eventually assume that the one and the only way to happiness is to possess as much cash as possible, which is misleading altogether. Furthermore, following these celebrities in a long-term would result in detrimental habits for young people. As youngsters do not have sufficient awareness and experiences about life, they would have a tendency of lavishing money to afford costly clothes and features as a way to show off their personality as cool and up-to-date. For instance, colleges could spend 20,000$ to obtain a useless hat with an established brand in it to brag about their coolness and playfulness at parties.
In conclusion, whereas wealthiness could sometimes produce pros, its cons towards youngsters are still more influential.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 5, column 84, Rule ID: ONES[1]
Message: Did you mean 'one's'?
Suggestion: one's
...es, overusing money as a mean to spread ones fame tends to cause more harm than good...
^^^^
Line 5, column 800, Rule ID: CURRENCY[1]
Message: The currency mark is usually put at the beginning of the number: '$000'.
Suggestion: $000
.... For instance, colleges could spend 20,000$ to obtain a useless hat with an establi...
^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, besides, furthermore, if, look, so, still, thus, well, whereas, while, apart from, for instance, in conclusion, such as, in other words, on the other hand
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 15.0 13.1623246493 114% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 14.0 7.85571142285 178% => OK
Conjunction : 10.0 10.4138276553 96% => OK
Relative clauses : 11.0 7.30460921844 151% => OK
Pronoun: 29.0 24.0651302605 121% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 46.0 41.998997996 110% => OK
Nominalization: 7.0 8.3376753507 84% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1968.0 1615.20841683 122% => OK
No of words: 370.0 315.596192385 117% => OK
Chars per words: 5.31891891892 5.12529762239 104% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.38581623665 4.20363070211 104% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.86150236123 2.80592935109 102% => OK
Unique words: 230.0 176.041082164 131% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.621621621622 0.561755894193 111% => OK
syllable_count: 615.6 506.74238477 121% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.7 1.60771543086 106% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 7.0 5.43587174349 129% => OK
Article: 2.0 2.52805611222 79% => OK
Subordination: 4.0 2.10420841683 190% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 0.809619238477 0% => OK
Preposition: 7.0 4.76152304609 147% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 16.0 16.0721442886 100% => OK
Sentence length: 23.0 20.2975951904 113% => OK
Sentence length SD: 52.9302312011 49.4020404114 107% => OK
Chars per sentence: 123.0 106.682146367 115% => OK
Words per sentence: 23.125 20.7667163134 111% => OK
Discourse Markers: 10.0 7.06120827912 142% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.38176352705 91% => OK
Language errors: 2.0 5.01903807615 40% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 13.0 8.67935871743 150% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 2.0 3.9879759519 50% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 1.0 3.4128256513 29% => More facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.225870485395 0.244688304435 92% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0678773483813 0.084324248473 80% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0480851417513 0.0667982634062 72% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.127870811918 0.151304729494 85% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0693068085567 0.056905535591 122% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 15.2 13.0946893788 116% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 39.67 50.2224549098 79% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.44779559118 118% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 13.4 11.3001002004 119% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 13.87 12.4159519038 112% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 9.9 8.58950901804 115% => OK
difficult_words: 120.0 78.4519038076 153% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 11.5 9.78957915832 117% => OK
gunning_fog: 11.2 10.1190380762 111% => OK
text_standard: 12.0 10.7795591182 111% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Rates: 89.8876404494 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 8.0 Out of 9
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.