Do you agree or disagree with the following statement?Famous entertainers and athletes deserve to have more privacy than they have now
Todays, popularity although has a lot of advantages, it is potential to bring out problems in a variety of ways. Thereafter, some of the Famous entertainers and athletes tend to have much more privacy than that in current their situation, while others may be satisfy with their current privacy. When it comes to me, I certainly will follow those who deserve former. I have several persuasive reasons, some of the most outstanding of which are discussed in detail in the following:
As the most reasonable idea that I think that popular entertainers and athletes deserve to have higher privacy compared to the that in the now, is that they like all of people need to think lonely about their life, their goals, their relationships, and such things. Maybe they want to think in-depth to these items when they are walking in a street or a beach. They are right to have this privacy for thinking, likewise all of people in a society. As an example, I know a famous character, by the way a famous athlete, who every time had want to have a walk and think and solve his mental problems, a lot of people gathered around his for taking a photo, so he was unable to spend some times for himself, eventually, unfortunately, he decided to kill himself in order to his mental disease.
Secondly, being sole is potential to enhance the human being performance, especially when people in the lonely time try to work on themselves. In this way, being sole and more privacy would result in that famous entertainers and athletes more and more work on themselves, plan for their future, distinguish their weakness, and try to eliminate them.
As third reason, in the public, under eyes of a lot of people, famous entertainers and athletes are obligated to behavior in the way that people want and like, whereas in the lonely situation people are able to be everyone that they want. So, these famous people tend to have more privacy, because they are supposed to be in a discipline in among people. they, however, could be themselves, without any roll playing, in their privacy circumstances. So, they have this chance to do everything that they tend to do
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 126, Rule ID: SOME_OF_THE[1]
Message: Simply use 'some'.
Suggestion: some
...blems in a variety of ways. Thereafter, some of the Famous entertainers and athletes tend t...
^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 2, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
... discussed in detail in the following: As the most reasonable idea that I think...
^^
Line 2, column 683, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...aking a photo, so he was unable to spend some times for himself, eventually, unfo...
^^
Line 3, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...mself in order to his mental disease. Secondly, being sole is potential to enh...
^^
Line 4, column 356, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: They
... to be in a discipline in among people. they, however, could be themselves, without ...
^^^^
Line 4, column 513, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...ce to do everything that they tend to do
^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
however, if, likewise, may, second, secondly, so, third, whereas, while, i think, by the way
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 17.0 15.1003584229 113% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 5.0 9.8082437276 51% => OK
Conjunction : 12.0 13.8261648746 87% => OK
Relative clauses : 15.0 11.0286738351 136% => OK
Pronoun: 49.0 43.0788530466 114% => OK
Preposition: 62.0 52.1666666667 119% => OK
Nominalization: 4.0 8.0752688172 50% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1770.0 1977.66487455 89% => OK
No of words: 373.0 407.700716846 91% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.74530831099 4.8611393121 98% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.39467950092 4.48103885553 98% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.68375993738 2.67179642975 100% => OK
Unique words: 184.0 212.727598566 86% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.493297587131 0.524837075471 94% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 563.4 618.680645161 91% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.51630824373 99% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 10.0 9.59856630824 104% => OK
Article: 1.0 3.08781362007 32% => OK
Subordination: 5.0 3.51792114695 142% => OK
Conjunction: 2.0 1.86738351254 107% => OK
Preposition: 6.0 4.94265232975 121% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 13.0 20.6003584229 63% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 28.0 20.1344086022 139% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively long.
Sentence length SD: 99.297234747 48.9658058833 203% => The lengths of sentences changed so frequently.
Chars per sentence: 136.153846154 100.406767564 136% => OK
Words per sentence: 28.6923076923 20.6045352989 139% => OK
Discourse Markers: 7.07692307692 5.45110844103 130% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 6.0 5.5376344086 108% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 7.0 11.8709677419 59% => More positive sentences wanted.
Sentences with negative sentiment : 4.0 3.85842293907 104% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 2.0 4.88709677419 41% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.321823990766 0.236089414692 136% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.118366501216 0.076458572812 155% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0793602266257 0.0737576698707 108% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.195948951854 0.150856017488 130% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0516951037799 0.0645574589148 80% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 15.3 11.7677419355 130% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 51.52 58.1214874552 89% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 6.10430107527 144% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 13.0 10.1575268817 128% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 10.86 10.9000537634 100% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.24 8.01818996416 103% => OK
difficult_words: 76.0 86.8835125448 87% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 14.0 10.002688172 140% => OK
gunning_fog: 13.2 10.0537634409 131% => OK
text_standard: 14.0 10.247311828 137% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 73.3333333333 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 22.0 Out of 30
---------------------
Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.