Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Famous entertainers and athletes deserve to have more privacy than they have now. Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.
In this era of the internet where information is exchanging at an unprecedented speed between us, it’s not to be surprised that entertainers and athletes often appear on our phones. Due to the characteristic of their job which constantly put them under the society’s judgment, the public inevitably, often keep track of the life of those people even after they leave the stage. Therefore, they actually deserve even more privacy than general people because being exposed to the public is their job, and once they get home, they are nothing more but just normal people.
As discussed in the introduction, athletes and entertainers can be especially in want of privacy because they are the role of models in front of the camera, but meanwhile, also normal people at home. Their every action on the screen is always being magnified and judged, therefore, they need time for themselves and to relax with no voice from outside. The fact that society’s eye is constantly on them even after work can often exhaust them.
Celebrity often plays the role of some sort of model for the public and their fans in particular, as a result, any negative or inappropriate behavior can bring bad consequence to the society because the public may follow it. When entertainers are in the mode of working, it’s likely that they are as good as a model as they can be, and after the spotlight has turned away, they shouldn’t be under the public’s view anymore. However, if privacy is not concerned for them, their behavior after work, which is likely to be different from their performance in front of the camera, might be leaked to the internet and caused lots of issues.
Lastly, why not put yourself into a celebrity’s shoes. Imagine your every decision and behavior being judged by the public, or being stalk by paparazzi by every circumstance, you certainly will feel as if you are almost under surveillance. It’s a tremendous discomfort.
To sum up, athletes and entertainers are no different than us normal people, they certainly deserve one of the important human rights, which is privacy. Not to mention that they already have no privacy as their job is to be played on screen. Without a doubt, they need more privacy.
| Post date | Users | Rates | Link to Content |
|---|---|---|---|
| 2022-12-24 | nikki07hung | 66 | view |
| 2022-12-24 | nikki07hung | 66 | view |
| 2022-12-24 | nikki07hung | 66 | view |
| 2022-12-03 | tststs | 76 | view |
| 2022-10-25 | _sta | 66 | view |
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Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 413, Rule ID: AFFORD_VB[1]
Message: This verb is used with the infinitive: 'to even'
Suggestion: to even
...stage. Therefore, they actually deserve even more privacy than general people becaus...
^^^^
Line 5, column 56, Rule ID: RATHER_THEN[2]
Message: Did you mean 'different 'from''? 'Different than' is often considered colloquial style.
Suggestion: from
...letes and entertainers are no different than us normal people, they certainly deserv...
^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
actually, also, but, however, if, lastly, may, so, therefore, while, in particular, sort of, as a result, to sum up
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 25.0 15.1003584229 166% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 9.0 9.8082437276 92% => OK
Conjunction : 14.0 13.8261648746 101% => OK
Relative clauses : 9.0 11.0286738351 82% => OK
Pronoun: 41.0 43.0788530466 95% => OK
Preposition: 52.0 52.1666666667 100% => OK
Nominalization: 8.0 8.0752688172 99% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1853.0 1977.66487455 94% => OK
No of words: 377.0 407.700716846 92% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.9151193634 4.8611393121 101% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.4064143971 4.48103885553 98% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.72897248821 2.67179642975 102% => OK
Unique words: 193.0 212.727598566 91% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.511936339523 0.524837075471 98% => OK
syllable_count: 578.7 618.680645161 94% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.51630824373 99% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 12.0 9.59856630824 125% => OK
Article: 2.0 3.08781362007 65% => OK
Subordination: 4.0 3.51792114695 114% => OK
Conjunction: 4.0 1.86738351254 214% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 3.0 4.94265232975 61% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 15.0 20.6003584229 73% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 25.0 20.1344086022 124% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively long.
Sentence length SD: 64.7273255022 48.9658058833 132% => OK
Chars per sentence: 123.533333333 100.406767564 123% => OK
Words per sentence: 25.1333333333 20.6045352989 122% => OK
Discourse Markers: 7.66666666667 5.45110844103 141% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 4.53405017921 110% => OK
Language errors: 2.0 5.5376344086 36% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 7.0 11.8709677419 59% => More positive sentences wanted.
Sentences with negative sentiment : 7.0 3.85842293907 181% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 1.0 4.88709677419 20% => More facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.161880496679 0.236089414692 69% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0592464113097 0.076458572812 77% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0505311722963 0.0737576698707 69% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.101750703715 0.150856017488 67% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0527889521049 0.0645574589148 82% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 14.3 11.7677419355 122% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 54.56 58.1214874552 94% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 6.10430107527 144% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.9 10.1575268817 117% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.55 10.9000537634 106% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.89 8.01818996416 98% => OK
difficult_words: 72.0 86.8835125448 83% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 14.0 10.002688172 140% => OK
gunning_fog: 12.0 10.0537634409 119% => OK
text_standard: 12.0 10.247311828 117% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Rates: 73.3333333333 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 22.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.