Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Most business people are motivated only by the desire for more money.

Essay topics:

Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Most business people are motivated only by the desire for more money.

All enterprises' management is always looking for motivate their employees to gain more financial benefits. Even though, one of the ordinary approach to encourage business people is paying more money, I, personally, subscribe to a proverb that says: "it isn’t possible to buy valuable things with money". I am of the opinion that financial incentives have ephemeral effects. One person will be success in their businesses only if they pursue their interest, accordingly they will be beneficial for their administrators and even their society.
In first place, psychologically speaking, each individual can be prosperous if be satisfied from his or her life. The people must try hard in order to reach their goals and interests which is first step of thriving of people. Different people have different interests and ultimate goals like becoming famous, being helpful for human beings, creating something new and so on. Chasing these interests by people depending on their personality and desires, prepare opportunity to be motivated during their life and job. It is possible stimulate most people to do their job well and be motivation person, but only for a short time. After a while, people who aren’t in their right place, I mean in the position related their interest, will be frustrated and no longer do their best. For example, I used to work at an employee in a Medical Equipment Manufacturer in which I had to do something routine job without any recreation and research condition. Even though I earn a lot money, after a while I couldn’t do my job with interest opposite the starting months of working, because I am a person who like being up-to-date and do research for something new.
Secondly, statistically speaking, most of people who are in a good financial condition aren’t any more desire in their life. Oppositely, the middle class of the society are more interested and motivated to be success. In fact, one the most conspicuous characteristic of human beings is being live and active because of the desire of compensate their lacking in life. The individuals who can earn a great deal of money, a short time later of being prosperous and wealthy, they go toward this thinking: they can buy and own every things which they want, they haven’t any specific required. This point of view make them upset and aimless. It is hard for them to find a valuable goal in their life because most of them habit to evaluate and measure everything with money.
In summary, by considering all of these into account, I think that money isn’t a reliable and permanent motivation in anyone's life. The people need to be in the way of their interest in order to be energized and simulated person. It is not to mention that money after passing a short time make people upset and aimless because money change their way of viewing to life.

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Independent TOEFL Writing

Comments

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 5, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[1]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'enterprises'' or 'enterprise's'?
Suggestion: enterprises'; enterprise's
All enterprises management is always looking for motiva...
^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 35, Rule ID: MOST_SOME_OF_NNS[1]
Message: After 'most of', you should use 'the' ('most of the people') or simply say ''most people''.
Suggestion: most of the people; most people
...new. Secondly, statistically speaking, most of people who are in a good financial condition a...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
accordingly, but, first, if, look, second, secondly, so, well, while, for example, i mean, i think, in fact, in summary

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 23.0 15.1003584229 152% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 8.0 9.8082437276 82% => OK
Conjunction : 21.0 13.8261648746 152% => OK
Relative clauses : 11.0 11.0286738351 100% => OK
Pronoun: 49.0 43.0788530466 114% => OK
Preposition: 71.0 52.1666666667 136% => OK
Nominalization: 9.0 8.0752688172 111% => OK

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2398.0 1977.66487455 121% => OK
No of words: 481.0 407.700716846 118% => OK
Chars per words: 4.98544698545 4.8611393121 103% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.68313059816 4.48103885553 105% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.83229527357 2.67179642975 106% => OK
Unique words: 239.0 212.727598566 112% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.496881496881 0.524837075471 95% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 760.5 618.680645161 123% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.51630824373 106% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 11.0 9.59856630824 115% => OK
Article: 5.0 3.08781362007 162% => OK
Subordination: 5.0 3.51792114695 142% => OK
Conjunction: 1.0 1.86738351254 54% => OK
Preposition: 6.0 4.94265232975 121% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 21.0 20.6003584229 102% => OK
Sentence length: 22.0 20.1344086022 109% => OK
Sentence length SD: 43.7342002569 48.9658058833 89% => OK
Chars per sentence: 114.19047619 100.406767564 114% => OK
Words per sentence: 22.9047619048 20.6045352989 111% => OK
Discourse Markers: 5.66666666667 5.45110844103 104% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 2.0 5.5376344086 36% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 18.0 11.8709677419 152% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 2.0 3.85842293907 52% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 1.0 4.88709677419 20% => More facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.217820721088 0.236089414692 92% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.076897408561 0.076458572812 101% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0583112357707 0.0737576698707 79% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.149191433825 0.150856017488 99% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0231360887954 0.0645574589148 36% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 13.5 11.7677419355 115% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 49.15 58.1214874552 85% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 6.10430107527 144% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.9 10.1575268817 117% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.96 10.9000537634 110% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.21 8.01818996416 102% => OK
difficult_words: 106.0 86.8835125448 122% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 12.5 10.002688172 125% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.8 10.0537634409 107% => OK
text_standard: 12.0 10.247311828 117% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:

para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.

So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:

reasons == advantages or

reasons == disadvantages

for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.

or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.


Rates: 73.3333333333 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 22.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.