Do you agree or disagree with the following statement?
One of the best ways that parents can help their teenage children prepare for adult life is to encourage them to take a part-time job.
Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.
Nowadays, one of the most important issues in the life of human beings is to find a better way for their children to get ready for their life in the future. Personally, I believe that one of the best ways that parents can use to help their children be prepared for the adult life is to encourage them to have a part-time job. I feel this way for two reasons, which I explore in the following essay.
To being with, I believe that parents should encourage their children to work in order to be prepared for their adult life, due to having a part-time job will provide a chance for children to learn how to have a communication with other people. To be more specific, when children are working, they have this chance to talk and make new relationships with new people who have different personalities and it paves the way for them to learn how to behave with many kinds of personalities. For instance, twenty years ago, when I was a child my father did his best to make me ready for my future life. Whereas, he knew that I was a shy person and I used to have problems to get connected to other/ socialize with people whom I did not know, he encouraged me to work with him at his shop and provided me a chance to learn how to communicate with different people. Consequently, I improved my skills and now not only I am not a shy person, but I am a person with a high level of ability to make a new relationship.
Moreover, I strongly believe that this is very important for children to have enough self-confidence and one of the best ways to improve this ability is to work when they are teenagers. To put it in other words, having a part-time job will make it easier - for children to have their income and have their own salary, which gives them a perfect feeling of self-confidence, because they can make their own decision and buy everything that they want.. For instance, in the example mentioned in the past paragraph, my father not only helped me not to be a shy person, but he helped me to improve my personality. While I was working in his shop, he paid me a regular salary as a worker and I saved my income in my bank account. Thus, I could buy everything for myself that I wanted and spend money for my friend when we went out. All of them would help me to improve my self-confidence and had a perfect feeling.
In conclusion, according to all the reasons and examples, I strongly believe that encouraging children to have a part-time job by their parents, make them ready for their future life. This is because not only they learn to make better communication but their self-confidence will improve.
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2022-11-23 | HSNDEK | 73 | view |
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2022-09-26 | alishadean | 40 | view |
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Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 2, column 4, Rule ID: BEING_BEGIN[1]
Message: Did you mean 'begin'?
Suggestion: begin
...h I explore in the following essay. To being with, I believe that parents should enc...
^^^^^
Line 3, column 447, Rule ID: DOUBLE_PUNCTUATION
Message: Two consecutive dots
Suggestion: .
...cision and buy everything that they want.. For instance, in the example mentioned ...
^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
but, consequently, if, moreover, so, thus, whereas, while, for instance, i feel, in conclusion, in other words
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 15.0 15.1003584229 99% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 8.0 9.8082437276 82% => OK
Conjunction : 15.0 13.8261648746 108% => OK
Relative clauses : 16.0 11.0286738351 145% => OK
Pronoun: 80.0 43.0788530466 186% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 64.0 52.1666666667 123% => OK
Nominalization: 8.0 8.0752688172 99% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2130.0 1977.66487455 108% => OK
No of words: 482.0 407.700716846 118% => OK
Chars per words: 4.41908713693 4.8611393121 91% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.68556276237 4.48103885553 105% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.72221852618 2.67179642975 102% => OK
Unique words: 194.0 212.727598566 91% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.402489626556 0.524837075471 77% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 684.0 618.680645161 111% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.4 1.51630824373 92% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 13.0 9.59856630824 135% => OK
Article: 0.0 3.08781362007 0% => OK
Subordination: 4.0 3.51792114695 114% => OK
Conjunction: 2.0 1.86738351254 107% => OK
Preposition: 6.0 4.94265232975 121% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 16.0 20.6003584229 78% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 30.0 20.1344086022 149% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively long.
Sentence length SD: 61.4575247122 48.9658058833 126% => OK
Chars per sentence: 133.125 100.406767564 133% => OK
Words per sentence: 30.125 20.6045352989 146% => OK
Discourse Markers: 6.875 5.45110844103 126% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 2.0 5.5376344086 36% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 14.0 11.8709677419 118% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 1.0 3.85842293907 26% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 1.0 4.88709677419 20% => More facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.306204712695 0.236089414692 130% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.125995647578 0.076458572812 165% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.125102278492 0.0737576698707 170% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.239105585782 0.150856017488 158% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.103856744755 0.0645574589148 161% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 14.5 11.7677419355 123% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 57.95 58.1214874552 100% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 6.10430107527 144% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 12.6 10.1575268817 124% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 8.95 10.9000537634 82% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.38 8.01818996416 92% => OK
difficult_words: 69.0 86.8835125448 79% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 13.0 10.002688172 130% => OK
gunning_fog: 14.0 10.0537634409 139% => OK
text_standard: 13.0 10.247311828 127% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 66.6666666667 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 20.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.