Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? In order to become financially responsible adults, children should learn to manage their own money at young age. Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.
Children have an influential and tremendous impact on our lives. In fact, they are the pillars and the power that can guide our nation to progress. So, it is crucial to start educating them from an early age because this will help them to fulfill their goals and their future principle necessities. However, I totally disagree with the statement that said that kids must learn about how to be a financially self-sufficient person in the future because this will affect their educational level and their communication skills. The explanations go as follow.
To begin with, education is deemed as the cornerstone of the societies and the lighting guide to almost all generation in order to their goals fulfillment to be achieved. Indeed, they have to focus on their teachers' valuable lessons rather than squandering their time in learning how to manage their money at this young age as this will lead to mind distraction. For instance, when I was at young age, I was more receptive to acquire knowledge because the young generation like a sponge able to absorb the information quickly and effectively. Thus, my father surged me to concentrate my mind on my study rather than working and gaining money, I followed his advice because I was pretty sure that he endowed me with best and beneficial information which is the outcome of his experience and knowledge. Moreover, I studied hard and got high scores that assisted me to apply to my dream college and be a dentist, after that, I began to learn how to manage my priorities and how to spend my wages in order to secure my future life. In contrast, if I wasted my time to learn how to use the money from that valuable age, sure that will reflect negatively on my studying career. Consequently, youth is an important period for enhancing the intellectual abilities and any other thing will keep our children away from this benefits.
Second, kids communication skills have many merits and great impacts on their future workflow and personalities. Indeed, they have to spend their leisure time in creating new friendships, interact with people rather and not consume their spare time in collecting money and learning how to spend it because communicating with people will aid them to establish a strong bond for their large social network. For example, when I was at the middle school, my history teacher created a friendlier atmosphere that helped me and my friends to express ourselves easily and clearly. In addition, this cooperative environment assisted us to cooperate efficiently and collaborate effectively and such a collaborative environment enhance my communication skills immensely which had a positive impact on my future work outcome because these skills learned me how to deal effectively with my coworkers and gain many promotions. So, I began to be a self-dependance financially. In conclusion, kids should spend most of there free time to instill the concrete basis of their social skills better than taking financial courses because these skills will help them to manage their salaries in the future.
To sum up, parents should eagerly seek to advocate their children to spend their time wisely on beneficial things such as the interpersonal relationships or their education because this will have a great impact on their future. Hopefully, kids will not waste their time in collecting money and learn how to manage them because they are still immature.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 546, Rule ID: AS_FOLLOW[1]
Message: Did you mean 'as follows'?
Suggestion: as follows
...mmunication skills. The explanations go as follow. To begin with, education is deemed a...
^^^^^^^^^
Line 2, column 1310, Rule ID: THIS_NNS[1]
Message: Did you mean 'these'?
Suggestion: these
... thing will keep our children away from this benefits. Second, kids communicatio...
^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
consequently, however, if, moreover, second, so, still, thus, for example, for instance, in addition, in conclusion, in contrast, in fact, such as, to begin with, to sum up
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 14.0 15.1003584229 93% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 13.0 9.8082437276 133% => OK
Conjunction : 24.0 13.8261648746 174% => OK
Relative clauses : 13.0 11.0286738351 118% => OK
Pronoun: 85.0 43.0788530466 197% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 75.0 52.1666666667 144% => OK
Nominalization: 19.0 8.0752688172 235% => Less nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2859.0 1977.66487455 145% => OK
No of words: 568.0 407.700716846 139% => Less content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.03345070423 4.8611393121 104% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.88187981987 4.48103885553 109% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.86025994656 2.67179642975 107% => OK
Unique words: 271.0 212.727598566 127% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.477112676056 0.524837075471 91% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 894.6 618.680645161 145% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.51630824373 106% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 13.0 9.59856630824 135% => OK
Article: 1.0 3.08781362007 32% => OK
Subordination: 4.0 3.51792114695 114% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 1.86738351254 0% => OK
Preposition: 7.0 4.94265232975 142% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 20.0 20.6003584229 97% => OK
Sentence length: 28.0 20.1344086022 139% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively long.
Sentence length SD: 78.7218362337 48.9658058833 161% => OK
Chars per sentence: 142.95 100.406767564 142% => OK
Words per sentence: 28.4 20.6045352989 138% => OK
Discourse Markers: 8.6 5.45110844103 158% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 2.0 5.5376344086 36% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 16.0 11.8709677419 135% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 1.0 3.85842293907 26% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 3.0 4.88709677419 61% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.188914121941 0.236089414692 80% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0647880021152 0.076458572812 85% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0449063783241 0.0737576698707 61% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.131815806134 0.150856017488 87% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0209653380906 0.0645574589148 32% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 16.5 11.7677419355 140% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 43.06 58.1214874552 74% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 6.10430107527 144% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 14.2 10.1575268817 140% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.19 10.9000537634 112% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.78 8.01818996416 110% => OK
difficult_words: 135.0 86.8835125448 155% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 8.5 10.002688172 85% => OK
gunning_fog: 13.2 10.0537634409 131% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 10.247311828 88% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Write the essay in 30 minutes.
Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 70.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 21.0 Out of 30
---------------------
Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.