Do you agree or disagree with the following statement?
People today spend too much time on personal enjoyment-doing things they like to do-rather than doing things they should do.
Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.
Like "Time and tides waits for a none" is one of the important proverb that explains the meaning of time. However, many people used and spend time by interacting in different sorts of the activities--reading, playing, dancing, visiting, etc. Everyone has their right as how would they can spend their time. Today, many people spend spend too much time on the personal enjoyment- doing the things of their own interest rather than the necessities.I feels this way for the two reasons which explains in the following essays.
First of all, many people was frequently used to spend their time in technology as it seems unnecessarily. These technology has allures the many people; and finally people forgot their important events. My personal experience is a compelling reason of this. I regularly used to look up at a facebook; which was really detrimental for my study. Once during the time of my Biology exam, I have just started to begin from the beginning of topic. Instantly, for a sudden refreshment, I looked up at a facebook. It was so unexpectedly that I continuously used the facebook for a four hous. I later being suddenly conscious that later day is my exam. Next day, due to my less preparation, I am unable to do better in my exam. Finally, I have been failed due to this personal enjoyment rather that focus in my pre-requisite things. These today technologies like mobile, video-game, computer, etc really lures the small children; and really creates a wastage of their valuable times by doing the unnecessary things. Although these internet makes a person a sudden thrilled and enjoyment for a certain time, it waste a lot of valuable times of a person; finally makes a huge loss in remaining part of the life.
Second, people focus on people focuses on personal enjoyment like travelling, dancing and many other extra-curricular activities. However, these personal enjoyment may gives a shot time satisfaction, these will really harms in long term; as people could not be able to circumspect over the different scenarios. For instances, one of my friend goes for a travelling when his parents was seriously ill. He looks towards his enjoyment. In this period his parents requires a great care and management. Unfortunately, due to the mental excruciation of his father with his behaviour--father died. In this case, if he have not gone for travelling or tour, his father may alive today. Consequently, due to the carelessness of my friend, he have to sacrifice his father. As a result, due to overshadowing of momentous things, people have to make a large loss in their life.
In conclusion, I am in the opinion that people used to spend a lot of time for their person enjoyment or a benifit. This is because that they were allured by different types of technological equipments, and different ways of modern enetertained facilities.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 337, Rule ID: ENGLISH_WORD_REPEAT_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a word
Suggestion: spend
...an spend their time. Today, many people spend spend too much time on the personal enjoyment...
^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 1, column 457, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: I
...wn interest rather than the necessities.I feels this way for the two reasons whic...
^
Line 1, column 459, Rule ID: NON3PRS_VERB[1]
Message: The pronoun 'I' must be used with a non-third-person form of a verb: 'feel'
Suggestion: feel
... interest rather than the necessities.I feels this way for the two reasons which expl...
^^^^^
Line 3, column 108, Rule ID: THIS_NNS[2]
Message: Did you mean 'this technology' or 'These technologies'?
Suggestion: This technology; These technologies
...n technology as it seems unnecessarily. These technology has allures the many people; and finall...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 1018, Rule ID: THIS_NNS[2]
Message: Did you mean 'this internet' or ''?
Suggestion: this internet;
... doing the unnecessary things. Although these internet makes a person a sudden thrilled and en...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 1103, Rule ID: IT_VBZ[1]
Message: Did you mean 'wastes'?
Suggestion: wastes
...ed and enjoyment for a certain time, it waste a lot of valuable times of a person; fi...
^^^^^
Line 5, column 612, Rule ID: HE_VERB_AGR[1]
Message: The pronoun 'he' must be used with a third-person verb: 'has'.
Suggestion: has
...viour--father died. In this case, if he have not gone for travelling or tour, his fa...
^^^^
Line 5, column 733, Rule ID: HE_VERB_AGR[1]
Message: The pronoun 'he' must be used with a third-person verb: 'has'.
Suggestion: has
...ue to the carelessness of my friend, he have to sacrifice his father. As a result, d...
^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
consequently, finally, first, however, if, look, may, really, second, so, for instance, i feel, in conclusion, as a result, first of all
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 12.0 15.1003584229 79% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 6.0 9.8082437276 61% => OK
Conjunction : 10.0 13.8261648746 72% => OK
Relative clauses : 9.0 11.0286738351 82% => OK
Pronoun: 58.0 43.0788530466 135% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 61.0 52.1666666667 117% => OK
Nominalization: 13.0 8.0752688172 161% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2387.0 1977.66487455 121% => OK
No of words: 479.0 407.700716846 117% => OK
Chars per words: 4.98329853862 4.8611393121 103% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.67825486995 4.48103885553 104% => OK
Word Length SD: 3.06178433237 2.67179642975 115% => OK
Unique words: 244.0 212.727598566 115% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.509394572025 0.524837075471 97% => OK
syllable_count: 756.0 618.680645161 122% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.51630824373 106% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 19.0 9.59856630824 198% => OK
Article: 0.0 3.08781362007 0% => OK
Subordination: 4.0 3.51792114695 114% => OK
Conjunction: 3.0 1.86738351254 161% => OK
Preposition: 4.0 4.94265232975 81% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 27.0 20.6003584229 131% => OK
Sentence length: 17.0 20.1344086022 84% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 44.3838784854 48.9658058833 91% => OK
Chars per sentence: 88.4074074074 100.406767564 88% => OK
Words per sentence: 17.7407407407 20.6045352989 86% => OK
Discourse Markers: 5.03703703704 5.45110844103 92% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 8.0 5.5376344086 144% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 16.0 11.8709677419 135% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 3.0 3.85842293907 78% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 8.0 4.88709677419 164% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.202464385571 0.236089414692 86% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0511044279642 0.076458572812 67% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0702269909052 0.0737576698707 95% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.137920683603 0.150856017488 91% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0811496160053 0.0645574589148 126% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 10.9 11.7677419355 93% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 54.22 58.1214874552 93% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 6.10430107527 144% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.9 10.1575268817 97% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.31 10.9000537634 104% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.01 8.01818996416 100% => OK
difficult_words: 107.0 86.8835125448 123% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 11.0 10.002688172 110% => OK
gunning_fog: 8.8 10.0537634409 88% => OK
text_standard: 11.0 10.247311828 107% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 70.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 21.0 Out of 30
---------------------
Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.