famous entertainers and athletes deserve to have more privacy than they have now

Essay topics:

famous entertainers and athletes deserve to have more privacy than they have now

In today's progressive and sophisticated world where we live in, no one can turn a blind eye to the significant effects of famous entertainers and popular athletes on people's lives. In this regard, some are inclined toward the opinion that the general public should respect these individuals' privacy. On the other extreme of the rope, others think that celebrities are not deserved to have more privacy in their lives and they should be treated similarly to other people in society. Although both sides take their own positions, personally speaking, I firmly believe that the first group carries more weight. In the following paragraphs, I will cogently explain my reasons to justify my viewpoints.
First of all, if famous athletes and entertainers have more privacy in their lives and jobs than the past and they have now, they will be mentally healthy and have better intellectual abilities, which affects their performance significantly. In other words, popular individuals such as athletes have a great influence on society. Thus, if people interfere in their private lives and disturb them by some negative activities such taking photos from their regular activities or broadcast fake news about them, their stress level will be increased drastically, preventing them to concentrate effectively on their tasks and duties; thus, they will show poor performance. For example, last year, one of the local television channels broadcasted fake news about the most popular soccer player in our city. He got angry about this news and could not play well in the world championship, which got upset people, who were a fan of him. Hence, the more people create a private atmosphere for famous entertainers and athletes, the better performance they will show, which affects positively people's lives and mood.
Secondly, when athletes and famous individuals feel that they have a private life, they will be encouraged to communicate and interact effectively with people, which affects people's lifestyle remarkably. To be more specific, since popular athletes and entertainers have been trying hard to achieve remarkable success in their lives, they have valuable experiences and new insights into their activities. Consequently, if they feel that the general public respect them and do not want to limit their privacy, they will be stimulated to express and share their experiences and novel ideas with people enthusiastically. In this situation, people can gain their advice and utilize them in their lives, which may lead them to become successful and prosperous in their lives. In contrast, for example, last year, one of the most popular athletes in our city, who had improved youngsters’ lifestyles remarkably, closed his private page on Instagram and YouTube. Because some radical journalists and reporters spread his private wife's images. After that, he disconnected his friendly interaction with people, which caused youths could not see his posts and therefore they missed the most professional exercise in tennis sport. Thus, if people do not limit celebrities’ privacy, they can obtain those famous valuable notions and experiences.
In conclusion, I strongly believe that famous athletes and popular entertainers are deserved to have more privacy and they should not be under the lens of media. Not only does it increase their feelings of security and improves their mental health, but it also encourages them to share their experiences and knowledge with people, which affects positively people’s lives in the long run.

Votes
Average: 7.3 (1 vote)
Essay Categories

Comments

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 244, Rule ID: GENERAL_XX[1]
Message: Use simply 'public'.
Suggestion: public
...re inclined toward the opinion that the general public should respect these individuals privac...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 1, column 280, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[2]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'individuals'' or 'individual's'?
Suggestion: individuals'; individual's
...the general public should respect these individuals privacy. On the other extreme of the ro...
^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 440, Rule ID: GENERAL_XX[1]
Message: Use simply 'public'.
Suggestion: public
...es. Consequently, if they feel that the general public respect them and do not want to limit t...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, consequently, first, hence, if, may, second, secondly, similarly, so, therefore, thus, well, for example, in conclusion, in contrast, such as, first of all, in other words

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 12.0 15.1003584229 79% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 16.0 9.8082437276 163% => OK
Conjunction : 31.0 13.8261648746 224% => Less conjunction wanted
Relative clauses : 18.0 11.0286738351 163% => OK
Pronoun: 67.0 43.0788530466 156% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 61.0 52.1666666667 117% => OK
Nominalization: 6.0 8.0752688172 74% => OK

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2979.0 1977.66487455 151% => OK
No of words: 556.0 407.700716846 136% => Less content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.35791366906 4.8611393121 110% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.85588840946 4.48103885553 108% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.8124867372 2.67179642975 105% => OK
Unique words: 275.0 212.727598566 129% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.494604316547 0.524837075471 94% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 916.2 618.680645161 148% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.51630824373 106% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 12.0 9.59856630824 125% => OK
Article: 2.0 3.08781362007 65% => OK
Subordination: 9.0 3.51792114695 256% => Less adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 1.0 1.86738351254 54% => OK
Preposition: 11.0 4.94265232975 223% => Less preposition wanted as sentence beginnings.

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 21.0 20.6003584229 102% => OK
Sentence length: 26.0 20.1344086022 129% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively long.
Sentence length SD: 59.0838598462 48.9658058833 121% => OK
Chars per sentence: 141.857142857 100.406767564 141% => OK
Words per sentence: 26.4761904762 20.6045352989 128% => OK
Discourse Markers: 8.66666666667 5.45110844103 159% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 3.0 5.5376344086 54% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 14.0 11.8709677419 118% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 3.0 3.85842293907 78% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 4.0 4.88709677419 82% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.319212030747 0.236089414692 135% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.109474603549 0.076458572812 143% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.146757381852 0.0737576698707 199% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.22654173583 0.150856017488 150% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0356500889415 0.0645574589148 55% => OK

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 17.1 11.7677419355 145% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 45.09 58.1214874552 78% => OK
smog_index: 11.2 6.10430107527 183% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 13.4 10.1575268817 132% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 14.1 10.9000537634 129% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.76 8.01818996416 109% => OK
difficult_words: 135.0 86.8835125448 155% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 14.5 10.002688172 145% => OK
gunning_fog: 12.4 10.0537634409 123% => OK
text_standard: 15.0 10.247311828 146% => OK
What are above readability scores?

---------------------
Write the essay in 30 minutes.
Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:

para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.

So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:

reasons == advantages or

reasons == disadvantages

for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.

or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.


Rates: 73.3333333333 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 22.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.