If you could change one important thing about your country, what would you change? Use reasons and specific examples to support your answer.
This is my favorite question which I thought about it many times. As I am living in a developing country, my people encounter to many problems such as social, economic, political and ecosystem. Unfortunately, most of these problems are rooted in our government's poor management style. My government's are mostly try to keep their position and they try to use propaganda to convince us that they are successful. But, we live in this country and all of us know that governments are wrong. So, if I have a chance to alter one important thing, that is my countries managers and governments. I will explain my reasons in following paragraphs.
As I mentioned, my countries is suffering from a serious economic problems as well as unemployment that is rooted in economic recession too. To solve these problems, my governments only planned to extract the oil, sell it and spend the oil money for their current costs. All of the people in my country are aware about the solution; investing. But my government's perspective toward investment is outdated. They are eager to invest more in oil industry and ignore high-technology products, Information Technology (IT) and start ups. Investing in oil is like to spend your money in a field that has a vague vision in ROI (Return on Investments). Therefore, I think we need governments and managers who are expert in investment and are skillful to select the best fields to invest.
Furthermore, my governments are very narrow-minded. Their governmental style is like more to dictators rather that a democratic society. They threat their oppositions and limit media and newspapers. They claim such actions are necessary for social security but we all know that they are afraid of letting people to involve in their decisions. For example, we have only a national television which always praise our governments and condemn their oppositions. They always call the oppositions as riots. In addition, our citizens are limited in conducting in demonstrations. Such programs are specific for supporters of regime. This cause to many people and elites prefer to go abroad. So, in order to be a democratic country, we need to change most of leaders.
Finally, because our management and top positions are assigned to limited people, we have a lot of financial and ethical corruptions in our country. The amount of financial corruptions are unbelievable. The last one was more than a billion dollars. Our financial system only give huge loans to some specific peoples, which are related to the governors. For example, in one of the cases, the Chief-Executive- officer (CEO) of our country's biggest bank was ran away to Canada and after that, we found that he was involved in a corruption worth of three billion dollars. Therefore, I think we need governments that are ethical and be serious with fighting against corruption.
To sum up, I think this one important change can be like a revolution in my country's condition. If these changes happen, we will see a sustainable development in all aspects like economy, social, political and individual freedom.I like to see the day which my country survived from corrupted and narrow-minded politicians.
Grammar and spelling errors:
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This is my favorite question which I tho...
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Message: Consider using a past participle here: 'tried'.
Suggestion: tried
...gement style. My governments are mostly try to keep their position and they try to ...
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Line 3, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
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... my reasons in following paragraphs. As I mentioned, my countries is sufferin...
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Line 3, column 70, Rule ID: A_PLURAL[2]
Message: Don't use indefinite articles with plural words. Did you mean 'problem'?
Suggestion: problem
...es is suffering from a serious economic problems as well as unemployment that is rooted ...
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Line 3, column 275, Rule ID: ALL_OF_THE[1]
Message: Simply use 'all the'.
Suggestion: All the
... the oil money for their current costs. All of the people in my country are aware about th...
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Line 5, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
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...to select the best fields to invest. Furthermore, my governments are very nar...
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Line 5, column 745, Rule ID: MOST_SOME_OF_NNS[1]
Message: After 'most of', you should use 'the' ('most of the leaders') or simply say ''most leaders''.
Suggestion: most of the leaders; most leaders
...a democratic country, we need to change most of leaders. Finally, because our management a...
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Line 7, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
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..., we need to change most of leaders. Finally, because our management and top ...
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Line 7, column 430, Rule ID: THE_SUPERLATIVE[2]
Message: A determiner is probably missing here: 'countrys the biggest'.
Suggestion: countrys the biggest
...the Chief-Executive- officer CEO of our countrys biggest bank was ran away to Canada and after t...
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...us with fighting against corruption. To sum up, I think this one important ch...
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Suggestion: I
...ocial, political and individual freedom.I like to see the day which my country su...
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Transition Words or Phrases used:
but, finally, furthermore, if, so, therefore, well, for example, i think, in addition, such as, as well as, to sum up
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 30.0 15.1003584229 199% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 6.0 9.8082437276 61% => OK
Conjunction : 21.0 13.8261648746 152% => OK
Relative clauses : 15.0 11.0286738351 136% => OK
Pronoun: 74.0 43.0788530466 172% => OK
Preposition: 70.0 52.1666666667 134% => OK
Nominalization: 15.0 8.0752688172 186% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2657.0 1977.66487455 134% => OK
No of words: 524.0 407.700716846 129% => OK
Chars per words: 5.07061068702 4.8611393121 104% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.7844588288 4.48103885553 107% => OK
Word Length SD: 3.05988524362 2.67179642975 115% => OK
Unique words: 255.0 212.727598566 120% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.486641221374 0.524837075471 93% => OK
syllable_count: 838.8 618.680645161 136% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.51630824373 106% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 26.0 9.59856630824 271% => Less pronouns wanted as sentence beginning.
Interrogative: 0.0 0.994623655914 0% => OK
Article: 3.0 3.08781362007 97% => OK
Subordination: 5.0 3.51792114695 142% => OK
Conjunction: 1.0 1.86738351254 54% => OK
Preposition: 5.0 4.94265232975 101% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 32.0 20.6003584229 155% => OK
Sentence length: 16.0 20.1344086022 79% => The sentence length is short
Sentence length SD: 44.5114868426 48.9658058833 91% => OK
Chars per sentence: 83.03125 100.406767564 83% => OK
Words per sentence: 16.375 20.6045352989 79% => OK
Discourse Markers: 3.65625 5.45110844103 67% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 4.53405017921 110% => OK
Language errors: 11.0 5.5376344086 199% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 17.0 11.8709677419 143% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 8.0 3.85842293907 207% => Less negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 7.0 4.88709677419 143% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.0908683590548 0.236089414692 38% => The similarity between the topic and the content is low.
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0245222152577 0.076458572812 32% => Sentence topic similarity is low.
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0343858457848 0.0737576698707 47% => Sentences are similar to each other.
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0527436116163 0.150856017488 35% => Maybe some paragraphs are off the topic.
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0221450573989 0.0645574589148 34% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 10.6 11.7677419355 90% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 55.24 58.1214874552 95% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 6.10430107527 144% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.5 10.1575268817 94% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.83 10.9000537634 109% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.29 8.01818996416 103% => OK
difficult_words: 128.0 86.8835125448 147% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 8.5 10.002688172 85% => OK
gunning_fog: 8.4 10.0537634409 84% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 10.247311828 88% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Rates: 73.3333333333 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 22.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.