Some parents offer their school-age children money for each high grade (mark) they get in school. Do you think this is a good idea?
Education is the bedrock of any society. Almost every parent, want their children to excel in their academics, the method used to achieve that result is of utmost importance. Some psychologists believe offering their school-aged wards money for each high-grade they get in school is the best approach to motivating them, while others are against such form of encouragement. In my opinion, I believe children attending school should not be rewarded with money when they do well at school, because such acts can prevent the children from actually studying hard.
First of all, it is important to take cognizance of the fact that offering children money at such tender age for grades earned in form of reward, only makes them less enthusiastic about learning and having in-depth knowledge of what is being taught, as they will only have superficial knowledge, thereby not achieving the goal of actually going to school. they become motivated only by the money at stake. This can bring about aberrant behaviour in such children. For instance, I had this cousin, whose mother usually gave him money each time he made good grades, as that was his only form of motivation. After a few years, his mother passed on, because of the pattern he was used, he dropped out of school as he had no one to continually motivate him with money.
Secondly, another reason rewarding children with money is not advisable is because it has a negative impact on them. Most school-aged children have no prior knowledge of managing funds as they are immature at heart. therefore, when they are offered such money, it leads them to being wasteful because they do not have any immediate need for it, as a result they spend it on unnecessary stuff which can lead to serious consequences. For example, in primary school, a friend of mine always received monetary reward from his parents when he scored high on tests and even examinations, which he spent on games, these games eventually led to him failing in school.
In conclusion, giving youngsters money as a type of motivation for high marks in school has a lot of negative impact on them.
Grammar and spelling errors:
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...hildren from actually studying hard. First of all, it is important to take co...
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...g the goal of actually going to school. they become motivated only by the money at ...
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...of actually going to school. they become motivated only by the money at stake. Th...
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...sin, whose mother usually gave him money each time he made good grades, as that w...
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Suggestion: Therefore
...ng funds as they are immature at heart. therefore, when they are offered such money, it l...
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Transition Words or Phrases used:
actually, first, second, secondly, so, therefore, thus, well, while, for example, for instance, in conclusion, as a result, first of all, in my opinion
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 15.0 15.1003584229 99% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 6.0 9.8082437276 61% => OK
Conjunction : 2.0 13.8261648746 14% => More conjunction wanted.
Relative clauses : 9.0 11.0286738351 82% => OK
Pronoun: 43.0 43.0788530466 100% => OK
Preposition: 54.0 52.1666666667 104% => OK
Nominalization: 7.0 8.0752688172 87% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1768.0 1977.66487455 89% => OK
No of words: 360.0 407.700716846 88% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.91111111111 4.8611393121 101% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.35587717469 4.48103885553 97% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.62522779729 2.67179642975 98% => OK
Unique words: 205.0 212.727598566 96% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.569444444444 0.524837075471 108% => OK
syllable_count: 545.4 618.680645161 88% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.51630824373 99% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 9.0 9.59856630824 94% => OK
Article: 2.0 3.08781362007 65% => OK
Subordination: 8.0 3.51792114695 227% => Less adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 0.0 1.86738351254 0% => OK
Preposition: 5.0 4.94265232975 101% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 14.0 20.6003584229 68% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 25.0 20.1344086022 124% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively long.
Sentence length SD: 80.7888404094 48.9658058833 165% => OK
Chars per sentence: 126.285714286 100.406767564 126% => OK
Words per sentence: 25.7142857143 20.6045352989 125% => OK
Discourse Markers: 10.7857142857 5.45110844103 198% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 5.0 5.5376344086 90% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 8.0 11.8709677419 67% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 4.0 3.85842293907 104% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 2.0 4.88709677419 41% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.417026795604 0.236089414692 177% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.138409298073 0.076458572812 181% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0929212044123 0.0737576698707 126% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.266745025788 0.150856017488 177% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0857505594712 0.0645574589148 133% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 14.6 11.7677419355 124% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 54.56 58.1214874552 94% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 6.10430107527 144% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.9 10.1575268817 117% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.49 10.9000537634 105% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.65 8.01818996416 108% => OK
difficult_words: 86.0 86.8835125448 99% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 11.0 10.002688172 110% => OK
gunning_fog: 12.0 10.0537634409 119% => OK
text_standard: 12.0 10.247311828 117% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 90.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 27.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.