Some parents offer their school-age children money for each high grade (mark) they get in school. Do you think this is a good idea?
Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.
Most people agree that parents can give their children money for each high grade that they obtain in school. In fact, they say that children may study better by this approach. Personally, however, I believe that parents must not give money to their children that persuade them for better result in their school. I feel this way for two reasons, which I will explore in the following essay.
To begin with, self-confidence is an important parameter that helps students to have better performance in their school's courses. So, parents should try to give their children opportunities to grow this parameter. Moreover, self-confidence causes that they purse their interests and improve their talents. My experience is a complling example of this. Five years ago, my parents decided to give me an oppotunity that I could apply for the music class. In the first session of that class, my father said that I give you money for each song that you could sing without problem. So, after some sessions, I saw that my performance was going to be declined because I did not have a good voice, and I quited this class after a year. This experience gave my father a lesson that he never gavegave me money as a gift if I could do anything. Now, he helps me with his words and advice and always says taht you should do whatever you want and try to be best in it.
Furthermore, parents have to help their children to find their interests and talents. In other words, talent is a crucial factor that can give a person energy to do whatever someone wants, even it apears to be impossible. However, parents decrease the interest of their children by giving them money instead of giving them hope. As a result, children select the courses that they can simply get a higher score without thinking about their talents and interests. For instance, I have always loved to become a computer programmer. Two years ago, my mother told me you should follow civil enginieering because there are more opportunities to find a job, and if you do this, I will give you money and support you. But, my teacher in school noticed and talked to my parents. So, they agreed that I should do anything that I wanted. Therefore, thanks to my teacher, today I am the good programmer.
To summarize, I strongly feel that giving the money to children for each high score that they can obtain in school is the worst idea. Instead of that, parents should improve their children's self-confidence and pay attention to their talents and interests.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 2, column 743, Rule ID: GAVE_GIVE[1]
Message: Did you mean 'give'?
Suggestion: give
...his class after a year. This experience gave my father a lesson that he never gavega...
^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
but, first, furthermore, however, if, may, moreover, so, therefore, for instance, i feel, in fact, as a result, in other words, to begin with
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 9.0 15.1003584229 60% => More to be verbs wanted.
Auxiliary verbs: 16.0 9.8082437276 163% => OK
Conjunction : 12.0 13.8261648746 87% => OK
Relative clauses : 21.0 11.0286738351 190% => OK
Pronoun: 90.0 43.0788530466 209% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 43.0 52.1666666667 82% => OK
Nominalization: 9.0 8.0752688172 111% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2062.0 1977.66487455 104% => OK
No of words: 437.0 407.700716846 107% => OK
Chars per words: 4.71853546911 4.8611393121 97% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.57214883401 4.48103885553 102% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.5844633082 2.67179642975 97% => OK
Unique words: 207.0 212.727598566 97% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.473684210526 0.524837075471 90% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 619.2 618.680645161 100% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.4 1.51630824373 92% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 15.0 9.59856630824 156% => OK
Article: 0.0 3.08781362007 0% => OK
Subordination: 2.0 3.51792114695 57% => OK
Conjunction: 2.0 1.86738351254 107% => OK
Preposition: 7.0 4.94265232975 142% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 24.0 20.6003584229 117% => OK
Sentence length: 18.0 20.1344086022 89% => OK
Sentence length SD: 33.5513443596 48.9658058833 69% => OK
Chars per sentence: 85.9166666667 100.406767564 86% => OK
Words per sentence: 18.2083333333 20.6045352989 88% => OK
Discourse Markers: 5.875 5.45110844103 108% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 1.0 5.5376344086 18% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 18.0 11.8709677419 152% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 2.0 3.85842293907 52% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 4.0 4.88709677419 82% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.353328652135 0.236089414692 150% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.105733285222 0.076458572812 138% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.071910634224 0.0737576698707 97% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.254427313372 0.150856017488 169% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0436260681238 0.0645574589148 68% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 9.9 11.7677419355 84% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 70.13 58.1214874552 121% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 6.10430107527 51% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 7.9 10.1575268817 78% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 10.1 10.9000537634 93% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.17 8.01818996416 89% => OK
difficult_words: 73.0 86.8835125448 84% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 8.5 10.002688172 85% => OK
gunning_fog: 9.2 10.0537634409 92% => OK
text_standard: 10.0 10.247311828 98% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 70.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 21.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.