Some people believe that when busy parents do not have a lot of time to spend with their children, the best use of that time is to have fun playing games or sports. Others believe that it is best to use that time doing things together that are related to schoolwork. Which of the two approaches do you prefer? Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.
Most of today parents are too busy to spend much time with their children. They have to work outside most of a day and virtually they are at home just at night. They wonder whether it is better for their children to play with them in that short time or to help them do their homework. In my opinion, it is much better to play games or do sports with their children, when they have time. It is because playing games and sports will help them to maintain their good relationship; additionally, during these kinds of activities, parents can help children in some of their schoolworks in a funnier atmosphere. I will illustrate my reasons in the following paragraphs.
First, creating fun time by playing games and sports can help parents to maintain their good relationship with their children. Good interaction between parents and children is a basic rule of a family. Children need to feel that their parents love them and care about them; thus, they can rely on them. Spending fun time with each other can strengthen these feelings. For example, I remember when I was a kid, I had a rough day at school. When I arrived home, my parents were still at work. I felt lonely and I cried a lot until I falt asleep. When I waked up, my parents were at home. Although I was still upset with them, when my father requested me to play tennis with him, I didn’t refute. During playing tennis, we had a funny, happy time. We laughed a lot about our mistakes during playing and talk about our daily events. I felt relaxed and happy after playing tennis and as a result, I wasn’t upset with them anymore. Thus, playing games and sports can improve the relationship between parents and their children.
Second, sometimes, playing games and sports provides a good opportunity to do some of schoolworks in a much funnier atmosphere. In other words, we can learn and do better in a funny condition rather than a strict one. For example, when I was a rudimentary student, I wasn’t good at multiplying numbers at all. My parents spend boring time with me to teach me that subject; but, every time I stressed out and couldn’t learn anything. I really liked playing with my parents. One night, my mother asked me to join her to play a funny game. The game instruction was like this: we should choose a playing card and ask the arithmetic question, which was written on it, from our partner. Instead of each correct answer, we could take one candy from the big bowl, where was in the middle of the desk. It was so cool, and I tried to win a lot of candies that night and nights after that. Actually, after that night, I found out that my mother made that game for me to encourage me to learn to multiply. Hence, we can play teaching games with our children to learn them school subjects in a funnier and more friendly condition.
Based on the aforementioned reasons, It can be concluded that when parents have little time to spend with their children, it is much better to play games and sports with them rather than doing school tasks.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 5, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...p between parents and their children. Second, sometimes, playing games and spo...
^^^^
Line 7, column 79, Rule ID: MOST_SOME_OF_NNS[1]
Message: After 'some of', you should use 'the' ('some of the schoolworks') or simply say ''some schoolworks''.
Suggestion: some of the schoolworks; some schoolworks
...ports provides a good opportunity to do some of schoolworks in a much funnier atmosphere. In other ...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
actually, but, first, hence, really, second, so, still, then, thus, for example, as a result, in my opinion, in other words
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 17.0 15.1003584229 113% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 13.0 9.8082437276 133% => OK
Conjunction : 21.0 13.8261648746 152% => OK
Relative clauses : 18.0 11.0286738351 163% => OK
Pronoun: 91.0 43.0788530466 211% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 82.0 52.1666666667 157% => OK
Nominalization: 5.0 8.0752688172 62% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2500.0 1977.66487455 126% => OK
No of words: 546.0 407.700716846 134% => OK
Chars per words: 4.57875457875 4.8611393121 94% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.83390555256 4.48103885553 108% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.51189992107 2.67179642975 94% => OK
Unique words: 235.0 212.727598566 110% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.430402930403 0.524837075471 82% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 730.8 618.680645161 118% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.3 1.51630824373 86% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 27.0 9.59856630824 281% => Less pronouns wanted as sentence beginning.
Article: 1.0 3.08781362007 32% => OK
Subordination: 7.0 3.51792114695 199% => OK
Conjunction: 1.0 1.86738351254 54% => OK
Preposition: 7.0 4.94265232975 142% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 31.0 20.6003584229 150% => OK
Sentence length: 17.0 20.1344086022 84% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 41.1195814569 48.9658058833 84% => OK
Chars per sentence: 80.6451612903 100.406767564 80% => OK
Words per sentence: 17.6129032258 20.6045352989 85% => OK
Discourse Markers: 3.96774193548 5.45110844103 73% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 2.0 5.5376344086 36% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 21.0 11.8709677419 177% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 3.0 3.85842293907 78% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 7.0 4.88709677419 143% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.309340873871 0.236089414692 131% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.095936330237 0.076458572812 125% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0893283688547 0.0737576698707 121% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.241755427605 0.150856017488 160% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0608586482069 0.0645574589148 94% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 8.9 11.7677419355 76% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 79.6 58.1214874552 137% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 6.10430107527 51% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 6.4 10.1575268817 63% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 8.99 10.9000537634 82% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 6.74 8.01818996416 84% => OK
difficult_words: 78.0 86.8835125448 90% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 10.5 10.002688172 105% => OK
gunning_fog: 8.8 10.0537634409 88% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 10.247311828 88% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 70.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 21.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.