TPO-21 - Independent Writing Task Do you agree or disagree with the following statement?For success in a future job, the ability to relate well to people is more important than studying hard in school. Use specific reasons and examples to support your ans
In my point of view, it is an accepted issue that having an appropriate connection with other people is more important than trying hard in school. In fact, sociable persons have opportunities in their whivh others will never experience it. being social opens a door in front of you to progress which is no need to any particular degree. Actually, studying hard does not insure your success. I support my idea by two reasons mentioned below.
The first and the foremost reason to defend my idea is that I believe social people who act warmly when they face other people, learn them how they should behave in any circumstances. Indeed, persons skilled in making a desirable relation with other people, are more prosperous in their career and life. Not only do they act so logically and never allow other people to have a confidense trick, but also they will never annoy anyone unreasonably. For example, children who have quite a bit of friends and have a proper relation with them will have a direct and without any vicissitudes in his future to enter the society. Ancestors said that you should look at society as a wolf which is ready to wipe out yourself. this thoght which is true partly in current society, tell us that everyone have to understand the worth of making a suitable connection.
Secondly, I want to look at this issue in another view. people who choose separation from others and avoid establishing connection, generally are depressed and unsociable. In addition, they have no one around themselves in their hardships and problems. On the other hand, sociable people connections is numerous enough to be calm against difficulties of life. Moreover, some of these sociable people do not have any academic degree; however, by using their connections, progressed a lot. Practically, they want others to enhance our level, find a high-level job, employ in an international job, etc.
As I said at first, being social, turn on some lights on in front of you which do not experience before. For example, I was looking for an appropriate job for a while, but I defeated and could not my favorite job by myself. when I told this matter to one of my friends which worked in a well-known company, he just told me “do not be worry”. Thereafter, called me and told “ you are invited to an interview in our company”. when I got there, they just said if you do no have any problem, you can start your job from tomorrow. if I did not have this connection, I could not find this opportunity.
Finally, it is worth mentioning that having reasonable relations with favorable persons will help us in our future and it will be more efficient than studying hard. it does not mean that studying hard is not good or we should ignore it, but it means that investing on making suitable connections is more effective in our lives than studying hard.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 717, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: This
...lf which is ready to wipe out yourself. this thoght which is true partly in current ...
^^^^
Line 5, column 57, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: People
... to look at this issue in another view. people who choose separation from others and a...
^^^^^^
Line 7, column 225, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: When
...nd could not my favorite job by myself. when I told this matter to one of my friends...
^^^^
Line 7, column 445, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: When
...d to an interview in our company'. when I got there, they just said if you do n...
^^^^
Line 7, column 547, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: If
..., you can start your job from tomorrow. if I did not have this connection, I could...
^^
Line 9, column 166, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: It
...l be more efficient than studying hard. it does not mean that studying hard is not...
^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
actually, also, but, finally, first, however, if, look, moreover, second, secondly, so, well, while, for example, in addition, in fact, on the other hand
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 19.0 15.1003584229 126% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 12.0 9.8082437276 122% => OK
Conjunction : 15.0 13.8261648746 108% => OK
Relative clauses : 18.0 11.0286738351 163% => OK
Pronoun: 70.0 43.0788530466 162% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 59.0 52.1666666667 113% => OK
Nominalization: 11.0 8.0752688172 136% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2376.0 1977.66487455 120% => OK
No of words: 497.0 407.700716846 122% => OK
Chars per words: 4.78068410463 4.8611393121 98% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.72159896747 4.48103885553 105% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.72759258399 2.67179642975 102% => OK
Unique words: 248.0 212.727598566 117% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.498993963783 0.524837075471 95% => OK
syllable_count: 737.1 618.680645161 119% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.51630824373 99% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 14.0 9.59856630824 146% => OK
Article: 1.0 3.08781362007 32% => OK
Subordination: 4.0 3.51792114695 114% => OK
Conjunction: 3.0 1.86738351254 161% => OK
Preposition: 5.0 4.94265232975 101% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 25.0 20.6003584229 121% => OK
Sentence length: 19.0 20.1344086022 94% => OK
Sentence length SD: 37.2757508308 48.9658058833 76% => OK
Chars per sentence: 95.04 100.406767564 95% => OK
Words per sentence: 19.88 20.6045352989 96% => OK
Discourse Markers: 6.12 5.45110844103 112% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 4.53405017921 110% => OK
Language errors: 6.0 5.5376344086 108% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 18.0 11.8709677419 152% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 5.0 3.85842293907 130% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 2.0 4.88709677419 41% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.226805031809 0.236089414692 96% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0627690717407 0.076458572812 82% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.057426370029 0.0737576698707 78% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.13869335606 0.150856017488 92% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0523361661654 0.0645574589148 81% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 11.0 11.7677419355 93% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 60.65 58.1214874552 104% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 6.10430107527 51% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.5 10.1575268817 94% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 10.44 10.9000537634 96% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.79 8.01818996416 97% => OK
difficult_words: 101.0 86.8835125448 116% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 7.5 10.002688172 75% => OK
gunning_fog: 9.6 10.0537634409 95% => OK
text_standard: 10.0 10.247311828 98% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Rates: 73.3333333333 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 22.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.