TPO 54: Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Governments should spend more money in support of arts than in support of athletics such as state-sponsored Olympic teams. Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.
When it comes to allocation the government budget to different areas there has been a controversial question about whether it is good that governments spent money to support arts or would be better to support athletics. From my own perspective, athletics has received considerations and supports from governments, on the other hand, arts have been ignored in recent years. Hence, it is of great importance to spend money to support art due to some obvious reasons. In the following paragraphs, I will cogently elaborate on my viewpoint.
The most prominent point regarding this issue is the fact that art plays a pivotal role in the identification of a nation and a nation without art does not have a specific identity. It is crystal clear for everyone that art is the best approach to convey the culture and historical background of a nation. Cinema and theater industry is a compelling example of what I mean. Nowadays in my country, Iran, what is performed on the theater stages exactly has a root in the rich culture of our country and it provides its spectators an opportunity to enhance their knowledge about historical and cultural issues. Also, theater can have further benefits for society. It can readily affect its beholders and educate them, emphasize the ethical values for them, and propel the society toward a higher level of culture. Therefore, it is crucial that governments invest money in the sphere of art.
Another equally noteworthy point coming to my mind is the economical outcomes of spending money on arts. There are young people who are really interested in art, but since most of the artistic careers are not financially supported by the government they do not follow their dreams and have to choose a totally different career. If governments initiate to support arts lots of youngsters will be able to materialize their dream and they will start their dream job. Another positive consequence of this step would be a noticeable reduction in unemployment in a society. When the government provides a good fund for arts, lots of workshops will be established. Therefore, artisans and craftsmen can have more job opportunities.
In short, all of the aforementioned reasons lead us to draw the conclusion that governments should spend money to support arts as it can enhance the culture and knowledge of society. Also, it can provide more job opportunities for youngsters who are interested in art.
Grammar and spelling errors:
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Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...ill cogently elaborate on my viewpoint. The most prominent point regarding this ...
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Line 7, column 11, Rule ID: ALL_OF_THE[1]
Message: Simply use 'all the'.
Suggestion: all the
...ave more job opportunities. In short, all of the aforementioned reasons lead us to draw ...
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Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, hence, if, really, regarding, so, therefore, i mean, in short, on the other hand
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 19.0 15.1003584229 126% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 12.0 9.8082437276 122% => OK
Conjunction : 14.0 13.8261648746 101% => OK
Relative clauses : 9.0 11.0286738351 82% => OK
Pronoun: 34.0 43.0788530466 79% => OK
Preposition: 53.0 52.1666666667 102% => OK
Nominalization: 12.0 8.0752688172 149% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2027.0 1977.66487455 102% => OK
No of words: 402.0 407.700716846 99% => OK
Chars per words: 5.04228855721 4.8611393121 104% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.47771567384 4.48103885553 100% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.93030180132 2.67179642975 110% => OK
Unique words: 211.0 212.727598566 99% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.524875621891 0.524837075471 100% => OK
syllable_count: 637.2 618.680645161 103% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.51630824373 106% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 6.0 9.59856630824 63% => OK
Article: 1.0 3.08781362007 32% => OK
Subordination: 3.0 3.51792114695 85% => OK
Conjunction: 2.0 1.86738351254 107% => OK
Preposition: 4.0 4.94265232975 81% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 19.0 20.6003584229 92% => OK
Sentence length: 21.0 20.1344086022 104% => OK
Sentence length SD: 56.3599433401 48.9658058833 115% => OK
Chars per sentence: 106.684210526 100.406767564 106% => OK
Words per sentence: 21.1578947368 20.6045352989 103% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.78947368421 5.45110844103 88% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 2.0 5.5376344086 36% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 15.0 11.8709677419 126% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 1.0 3.85842293907 26% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 3.0 4.88709677419 61% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.233154038625 0.236089414692 99% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0702441097318 0.076458572812 92% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0666246809363 0.0737576698707 90% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.158674547472 0.150856017488 105% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.069355534675 0.0645574589148 107% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 12.9 11.7677419355 110% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 50.16 58.1214874552 86% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 6.10430107527 144% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.5 10.1575268817 113% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.95 10.9000537634 110% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.68 8.01818996416 108% => OK
difficult_words: 102.0 86.8835125448 117% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 11.0 10.002688172 110% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.4 10.0537634409 103% => OK
text_standard: 12.0 10.247311828 117% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 80.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 24.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.