TPO14: People benefit more from travelling in their own country than from travelling to foreign countries.
Most people try to travel a lot because it is the most interesting way to get many pieces of information about the beautiful places they went. Even though there are some arguments about whether to travel to a foreign country or their own country, I believe that the travelling to the foreign country would get me more information and also more striking for me rather than travel from my country.
Above all, experiencing a far different culture and nature than your country would open your eyes. Many people who live and study in the foreign country think it is one of the most interesting experiences that they had. The real example of this is my experience. I travelled about five different countries to participate Olympiads. The striking thing that I found out is the dessert of Thailand which is rice with steamed banana. Anyone could not imagine the steamed banana and the taste of it was incredible which far different from what I imagined. Another thing is that they wear shoes only at formal events.
Another example is that travelling abroad will give a chance to face the pressing issues because in our own country we take things for granted. I think this will help people to give an opinion about the contributions that they could make. For example, my sister did not realise the problem of interaction. However, when she went to Austria to study, she understands the difference between people in Mongolia and Austria. People in Austria always say words that appreciate the work of others such as thank you and your welcome while here in Mongolia, people rarely use those words.
All in all, the differences between the two countries is unpredictable and things that never imagined. Because of that, I believe that travelling abroad is the best experience for everyone.
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, however, if, so, while, another thing, for example, i think, such as
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 11.0 15.1003584229 73% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 6.0 9.8082437276 61% => OK
Conjunction : 8.0 13.8261648746 58% => More conjunction wanted.
Relative clauses : 14.0 11.0286738351 127% => OK
Pronoun: 40.0 43.0788530466 93% => OK
Preposition: 36.0 52.1666666667 69% => OK
Nominalization: 6.0 8.0752688172 74% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1487.0 1977.66487455 75% => OK
No of words: 304.0 407.700716846 75% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.89144736842 4.8611393121 101% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.17559525986 4.48103885553 93% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.59448986961 2.67179642975 97% => OK
Unique words: 167.0 212.727598566 79% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.549342105263 0.524837075471 105% => OK
syllable_count: 462.6 618.680645161 75% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.51630824373 99% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 6.0 9.59856630824 63% => OK
Article: 3.0 3.08781362007 97% => OK
Subordination: 3.0 3.51792114695 85% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 1.86738351254 0% => OK
Preposition: 2.0 4.94265232975 40% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 16.0 20.6003584229 78% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 19.0 20.1344086022 94% => OK
Sentence length SD: 48.0406322164 48.9658058833 98% => OK
Chars per sentence: 92.9375 100.406767564 93% => OK
Words per sentence: 19.0 20.6045352989 92% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.9375 5.45110844103 91% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 0.0 5.5376344086 0% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 7.0 11.8709677419 59% => More positive sentences wanted.
Sentences with negative sentiment : 1.0 3.85842293907 26% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 8.0 4.88709677419 164% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.309697913841 0.236089414692 131% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0800058037624 0.076458572812 105% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.102026809531 0.0737576698707 138% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.184307972048 0.150856017488 122% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.120849702457 0.0645574589148 187% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 11.1 11.7677419355 94% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 60.65 58.1214874552 104% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 6.10430107527 51% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.5 10.1575268817 94% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.08 10.9000537634 102% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.75 8.01818996416 97% => OK
difficult_words: 61.0 86.8835125448 70% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 13.5 10.002688172 135% => OK
gunning_fog: 9.6 10.0537634409 95% => OK
text_standard: 10.0 10.247311828 98% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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We are expecting: No. of Words: 350 while No. of Different Words: 200
Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 70.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 21.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.