TPO46:
Do you agree or disagree with the following statement?
The opinions of celebrities, such as famous entertainers and athletes, are more important to younger people than they are to older people.
We are living in a day and age, as it commonly sensed, the very fast pace in development of the technology make many chances for people to become famous. With this in mind, a debate exists as to whether or not opinions of such famous people is of great importance for juveniles in comparison with the adult ones. Were I ask to give my point of view about this issue, I would definitely agree that celebrities’ lifestyle affect young people effectively on some reasons. The following paragraphs will aptly elucidate my standpoint with two conspicuous reasons.
The first and foremost, no one can turn a blind eye on the fact that young people are highly emotional and impressionable; therefore, they vulnerable to all sorts of opinions, particularly famous entertainers and athletes. Regarding this fact, a say comes to mind, the equivalent of which in English sound like this, “The youth is like a past,” which may be of assistance to clarify not shaping of young people, thereby following loveable, desirable characteristics of celebrities. on the other hand, in today's hectic life, older adult --contrary to the young stratum of society-- neither recognize most of the celebrities, nor do they like to get more familiar with them. Additionally, older adults can control themselves and continue their normal life without any variability.
Another salient reason springing to the mind is that idealism was one of the most important characteristics of the youth. It is worth to point out, consciously or unconsciously, world of today exposes life of well-known persons as an ideal life, hence it makes passion in juveniles for being and living like them. According to young’s minds, being well-liked and popular are as desirable traits of an ideal life. As an illustrator, I am eager to say about a personal memory in my family. My brother was fascinated by a famous actor called Radan in his youth and changed his lifestyle in direction of being similar with him. However, now, as an adult person, he does not know Radan as an ideal man. Without any shadow a doubt, as a result of the fact that adults passed this step of life, they are steady on their own way which selected it once a day as an ideal path, and are dependence on their knowledge and skills and does not care about celebrities.
As a consequence of aforementioned reasons and examples, it is crystal clear that they are more easily influenced by singers, actors or athletes. Last but not least, it is highly advised youngsters select a proper role model due to the considerable impact of it on their future.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 190, Rule ID: WHETHER[4]
Message: Wordiness: Shorten this phrase to the shortest possible suggestion.
Suggestion: whether; whether or not; as to whether
...ous. With this in mind, a debate exists as to whether or not opinions of such famous people is of gr...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 349, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma
Suggestion: , &apos
...ike this, 'The youth is like a past,' which may be of assistance to clarify ...
^^^^^^
Line 3, column 494, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: On
...sirable characteristics of celebrities. on the other hand, in todays hectic life, ...
^^
Line 5, column 793, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...ct that adults passed this step of life, they are steady on their own way which s...
^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
but, first, hence, however, if, may, regarding, so, therefore, well, as to, as a result, on the other hand
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 19.0 15.1003584229 126% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 5.0 9.8082437276 51% => OK
Conjunction : 17.0 13.8261648746 123% => OK
Relative clauses : 8.0 11.0286738351 73% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 40.0 43.0788530466 93% => OK
Preposition: 69.0 52.1666666667 132% => OK
Nominalization: 6.0 8.0752688172 74% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2166.0 1977.66487455 110% => OK
No of words: 439.0 407.700716846 108% => OK
Chars per words: 4.93394077449 4.8611393121 101% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.57737117129 4.48103885553 102% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.95477997936 2.67179642975 111% => OK
Unique words: 242.0 212.727598566 114% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.55125284738 0.524837075471 105% => OK
syllable_count: 691.2 618.680645161 112% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.51630824373 106% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 10.0 9.59856630824 104% => OK
Article: 7.0 3.08781362007 227% => Less articles wanted as sentence beginning.
Subordination: 5.0 3.51792114695 142% => OK
Conjunction: 2.0 1.86738351254 107% => OK
Preposition: 6.0 4.94265232975 121% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 17.0 20.6003584229 83% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 25.0 20.1344086022 124% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively long.
Sentence length SD: 56.7949020569 48.9658058833 116% => OK
Chars per sentence: 127.411764706 100.406767564 127% => OK
Words per sentence: 25.8235294118 20.6045352989 125% => OK
Discourse Markers: 6.23529411765 5.45110844103 114% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 4.0 5.5376344086 72% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 12.0 11.8709677419 101% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 2.0 3.85842293907 52% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 3.0 4.88709677419 61% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.193571503497 0.236089414692 82% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0564362546837 0.076458572812 74% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0571191855037 0.0737576698707 77% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.114844169224 0.150856017488 76% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0628004708467 0.0645574589148 97% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 14.7 11.7677419355 125% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 46.1 58.1214874552 79% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 6.10430107527 144% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 13.0 10.1575268817 128% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.61 10.9000537634 107% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 9.08 8.01818996416 113% => OK
difficult_words: 117.0 86.8835125448 135% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 12.0 10.002688172 120% => OK
gunning_fog: 12.0 10.0537634409 119% => OK
text_standard: 12.0 10.247311828 117% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 90.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 27.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.