When schools do not have enough funding or teachers, some people think physical education classes should be cut, while others believe that courses in art and music should be eliminated first. Which do you think is preferable, and why?
Schools should be provide proper funding from the government and parents consider it utmost important that their ward's school fee be paid within the deadline. In failing to do so, would cause severe problems to the proper functioning of the school and in the worst plausible scenario, teachers of specific subjects would be laid off. Although, sports and arts are equally important extra-curricular activities, in dire situations one must be sacrificed. Rationally speaking, the faculty of arts and music should be laid off respectfully.
Firstly, arts and music depend on whiteboards and instruments respectively. No doubt, mentors are needed to guide the children and hone their skills. However, as drastic situations causing the school to cancel these classes, would not affect as much as it would have if sport sessions were cancelled. The primary reason being that instruments and art materials are domestic objects, to which the students can easily practice at their own homes. But sports require a gymnasium and generally, a more wider playground than the gardens seen at home. To illustrate, consider an athelete who is preparing for the national 100 meter race. To practice he or she would require a 100 meter strip of a clean and straight lane. Additionally, other students who are about to compete in the same are required to race together. This provides a benchmark for each student as to how they are performing and it cannot be done without the proper conducive environment.
Secondly, tutors of arts and music are available even after school. They sometimes also visit the student's home as private tutors and there is almost no distinction in the quality of training than they would have recived at school. Unfortunately, this level of flexibility is not available in physical education classes. Obviously, a teacher cannot provide basketball lessons in the backyard of a student's home which would just be ridiculuous! Furthermore, the essence of sports lies in teamwork, which would require every student to be available at a common location, thus private sport tutoring is not feasible.
All in all, I would conclude that sport lessons cannot be compromised whereas subjects such as music and art, can be adjusted to private tutoring mode. In essence, you would actually not be sacrificing any course, since the students would be able to obtain a similar training outside the school environment. And in doing so, sport lessons at school can be continued without any obstructions.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 19, Rule ID: SHOULD_BE_DO[1]
Message: Did you mean 'provided'?
Suggestion: provided
Schools should be provide proper funding from the government and ...
^^^^^^^
Line 2, column 493, Rule ID: MOST_COMPARATIVE[2]
Message: Use only 'wider' (without 'more') when you use the comparative.
Suggestion: wider
...ts require a gymnasium and generally, a more wider playground than the gardens seen at hom...
^^^^^^^^^^
Line 4, column 163, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...ed to private tutoring mode. In essence, you would actually not be sacrificing an...
^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
actually, also, but, first, firstly, furthermore, however, if, second, secondly, so, thus, whereas, as to, no doubt, such as
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 26.0 15.1003584229 172% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 20.0 9.8082437276 204% => Less auxiliary verb wanted.
Conjunction : 17.0 13.8261648746 123% => OK
Relative clauses : 8.0 11.0286738351 73% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 19.0 43.0788530466 44% => OK
Preposition: 50.0 52.1666666667 96% => OK
Nominalization: 8.0 8.0752688172 99% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2098.0 1977.66487455 106% => OK
No of words: 404.0 407.700716846 99% => OK
Chars per words: 5.19306930693 4.8611393121 107% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.48327461151 4.48103885553 100% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.85797099976 2.67179642975 107% => OK
Unique words: 220.0 212.727598566 103% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.544554455446 0.524837075471 104% => OK
syllable_count: 639.9 618.680645161 103% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.51630824373 106% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 5.0 9.59856630824 52% => OK
Article: 5.0 3.08781362007 162% => OK
Subordination: 2.0 3.51792114695 57% => OK
Conjunction: 2.0 1.86738351254 107% => OK
Preposition: 7.0 4.94265232975 142% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 20.0 20.6003584229 97% => OK
Sentence length: 20.0 20.1344086022 99% => OK
Sentence length SD: 51.8795479934 48.9658058833 106% => OK
Chars per sentence: 104.9 100.406767564 104% => OK
Words per sentence: 20.2 20.6045352989 98% => OK
Discourse Markers: 6.2 5.45110844103 114% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 3.0 5.5376344086 54% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 5.0 11.8709677419 42% => More positive sentences wanted.
Sentences with negative sentiment : 6.0 3.85842293907 156% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 9.0 4.88709677419 184% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.225547042817 0.236089414692 96% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.07167298534 0.076458572812 94% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0540901422209 0.0737576698707 73% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.152823962302 0.150856017488 101% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.060389251329 0.0645574589148 94% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 13.1 11.7677419355 111% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 51.18 58.1214874552 88% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 6.10430107527 144% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.1 10.1575268817 109% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.82 10.9000537634 118% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.69 8.01818996416 108% => OK
difficult_words: 104.0 86.8835125448 120% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 8.5 10.002688172 85% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.0 10.0537634409 99% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 10.247311828 88% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 76.6666666667 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 23.0 Out of 30
---------------------
Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.