In the United States, medical information about patients traditionally has been recorded and stored on paper forms. However, there are efforts to persuade doctors to adopt electronic medical record systems in which information about patients is stored in electronic databases rather than on paper. It is argued that storing patients' medical records in electronic databases has several advantages over traditional paper-based record keeping.Reducing CostsFirst, the use of electronic records can help reduce costs by saving money on storing and transferring medical records. While paper records require a significant amount of storage space, electronic medical records take up virtually no space. Moreover, by having patients' records computerized in databases, doctors can easily access the records from almost anywhere and can easily duplicate and transfer them when necessary. This costs much less than copying, faxing, or transporting paper records from one location to another.Preventing ErrorsSecond, electronic medical records are crucial to reducing the chances of medical errors. Illegible handwriting, improper transcription of data, and nonstandard organization of paper records have caused errors that in some cases have had serious consequences for the patients' health. In contrast, electronic records are associated with standardization of forms and legible computer fonts and thus minimize the possibility of human error.Aiding ResearchThird, electronic medical records can greatly aid medical research by making it possible to gather large amounts of data from patient records. It is often impractical, impossible, or prohibitively expensive to manually go through thousands of patients’ paper records housed in doctors' offices. However, with the existence of electronic medical records, it would be simple to draw out the needed information from the medical databases because the databases are already formatted for data collection. Once in the electronic system, the records could be accessed from any research location.Word Count: 278
The reading and lecture both talking about adoption of electronic medical record systems. The reading provides three reasons to support electronic medical record has several advantages. However, the professor casts doubt on all of three reason by stating that these benefits are uncertain.
First of all, the reading states that for saving money electronic records are a good option because paper records require storage space that increase the cost. Also, databases help doctors to find record easily. Nevertheless, this point is challenged by the professor. She mantions that electronic record can not reduce costs because doctors still keep paper records as back up for emergensies and using inthe legal situation, so we still need storing and transfering of paper records.
Second, the reading posits that by using of electronic medical records, medical errors will be reduced. The professor, on the other hand, refutes this reason by saying that most doctors still use pen and pencil for note taking. Thus, stuff use doctors hand written for electronic records, and they have to interprete doctors notes. As a result, with having electronic records will not decrease human error.
Thirdly, the author claims that electronic medical records can be used for medical researchs, and this is a great opportunity for medical researchers to have practical and cheap access to datasets. However, the professor rebbuted this argument. She says that electronic database is not beneficial for researchers because privacy law dosn't allow researcher to have access to patients data. She says the law is restirict researcher and they have to get many permitions from organaization and patients, which is almost impossible.
In sum, all three aformantioned resons in the passage rejected categorically by the lectures.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 527, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: In
...nd patients, which is almost impossible.In sum, all three aformantioned resons in ...
^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, first, however, nevertheless, second, so, still, third, thirdly, thus, talking about, as a result, first of all, on the other hand
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 9.0 10.4613686534 86% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 5.0 5.04856512141 99% => OK
Conjunction : 9.0 7.30242825607 123% => OK
Relative clauses : 9.0 12.0772626932 75% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 19.0 22.412803532 85% => OK
Preposition: 26.0 30.3222958057 86% => OK
Nominalization: 4.0 5.01324503311 80% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1528.0 1373.03311258 111% => OK
No of words: 280.0 270.72406181 103% => OK
Chars per words: 5.45714285714 5.08290768461 107% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.09062348924 4.04702891845 101% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.70784951199 2.5805825403 105% => OK
Unique words: 160.0 145.348785872 110% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.571428571429 0.540411800872 106% => OK
syllable_count: 468.9 419.366225166 112% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.7 1.55342163355 109% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 4.0 3.25607064018 123% => OK
Article: 8.0 8.23620309051 97% => OK
Subordination: 1.0 1.25165562914 80% => OK
Conjunction: 2.0 1.51434878587 132% => OK
Preposition: 3.0 2.5761589404 116% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 15.0 13.0662251656 115% => OK
Sentence length: 18.0 21.2450331126 85% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 56.8148650345 49.2860985944 115% => OK
Chars per sentence: 101.866666667 110.228320801 92% => OK
Words per sentence: 18.6666666667 21.698381199 86% => OK
Discourse Markers: 9.4 7.06452816374 133% => OK
Paragraphs: 3.0 4.09492273731 73% => More paragraphs wanted.
Language errors: 1.0 4.19205298013 24% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 8.0 4.33554083885 185% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 6.0 4.45695364238 135% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 1.0 4.27373068433 23% => More facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.260735920439 0.272083759551 96% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0911143985401 0.0996497079465 91% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0718649495862 0.0662205650399 109% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.17103325943 0.162205337803 105% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0748906642172 0.0443174109184 169% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 13.6 13.3589403974 102% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 44.75 53.8541721854 83% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 5.55761589404 158% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.5 11.0289183223 104% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 14.39 12.2367328918 118% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.93 8.42419426049 106% => OK
difficult_words: 78.0 63.6247240618 123% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 7.0 10.7273730684 65% => OK
gunning_fog: 9.2 10.498013245 88% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 11.2008830022 80% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Minimum four paragraphs wanted. The correct pattern:
para 1: introduction
para 2: doubt 1
para 3: doubt 2
para 4: doubt 3
Less contents wanted from the reading passages(25%), more content wanted from the lecture (75%).
Don't need a conclusion paragraph.
Read sample essays from ETS:
http://www.testbig.com/users/toeflwritingmaster
Rates: 78.3333333333 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 23.5 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.