“Bayside citizens need to consider raising local taxes if they want to see improvements in the bay side school district. Test scores, graduation and college admission rates and a number of other indicators have long made it clear that bayside school district is doing a poor job educating the youth. Our school looks rundown. Windows are broken, bathrooms unusable, classroom equipment hopelessly out of date. Yet just across the bay, in New Harbor, school facilities are up-to-date and in good condition. The difference is money; new harbor spends twenty seven percent more per student than Bayside does, and test scores and other indicators of student performance are stronger in New Harbor as well.”
The writer believes the citizens of bayside citizens must agree to increase so that overall education system could be improved. However, the debate is not cogent enough since it rife with holes and assumptions.
The letter has claims that bayside is experiencing the alarming situation of drop of quality of education. he explains test scores, number of graduates and college acceptance rates have dropped. but, he fails to demonstrates any statistical data. We are not sure what percentage of senior students made into undergraduate schools and how many dropped out. it is unclear if the writer has factored other conditions that may have led to decline in the overall number. it could be the population of the city has dropped over the period of time, thus number of students to made into colleges also reduced. it could be the level of difficulty of the syllabus has been sustainably increased, thus student have to work harder to score in the test and so the class average turns to be lower than before.
Secondly, it has been stated the facilities available in the schools are in deteriorating condition. The windows and bathrooms are in dire need of repairing and classroom equipment needs to be replaced. While it understandable that restrooms are basic essentials and must be causing much discomfort to pupils, but to what level broken windows and obsolete equipment are hampering their studies remain unclear. is the weather cold and it is difficult to bear the chill breeze? Does the white boards have cracks that make them less readable?
Thirdly, the writer has brought the attention of the readers to the schools of New Harbor where the government is investing more in education and so the condition of the schools are much considerable. The writer makes some presumptions. First, since the schools are in better shape, they must have standard of education. The student must scoring well and most the final-year high schools student are being admitted for bachelors degree. No data has been shared with reader to develop better understanding. Second, the result of higher percentage of fund allocation to schools as due to high amount of revenue generated from tax. it could be this city has different priorities. Rather than spending of defense, policy maker might be spending it in education.
it could be possible the condition of schools of bayside have worsen. but need further details, to understand the exact case. There is no evidence shared in the letter it is ascertain that government will invest more in education if more tax is paid.
Comments
Essay evaluation report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 4.5 out of 6
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 18 15
No. of Words: 426 350
No. of Characters: 2092 1500
No. of Different Words: 218 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.543 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.911 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.634 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 157 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 116 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 75 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 53 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 23.667 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 19.02 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.667 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.287 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.515 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.066 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 4, column 108, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: He
...uation of drop of quality of education. he explains test scores, number of graduat...
^^
Line 4, column 196, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: But
... college acceptance rates have dropped. but, he fails to demonstrates any statistic...
^^^
Line 4, column 213, Rule ID: TO_NON_BASE[1]
Message: The verb after "to" should be in the base form: 'demonstrate'.
Suggestion: demonstrate
...ce rates have dropped. but, he fails to demonstrates any statistical data. We are not sure w...
^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 4, column 357, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: It
...duate schools and how many dropped out. it is unclear if the writer has factored o...
^^
Line 4, column 467, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: It
...e led to decline in the overall number. it could be the population of the city has...
^^
Line 4, column 527, Rule ID: PERIOD_OF_TIME[1]
Message: Use simply 'period'.
Suggestion: period
...lation of the city has dropped over the period of time, thus number of students to made into c...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 4, column 603, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: It
...nts to made into colleges also reduced. it could be the level of difficulty of the...
^^
Line 4, column 603, Rule ID: ENGLISH_WORD_REPEAT_BEGINNING_RULE
Message: Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Reword the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
...nts to made into colleges also reduced. it could be the level of difficulty of the...
^^
Line 7, column 411, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Is
...hampering their studies remain unclear. is the weather cold and it is difficult to...
^^
Line 10, column 381, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[1]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'schools'' or 'school's'?
Suggestion: schools'; school's
...oring well and most the final-year high schools student are being admitted for bachelor...
^^^^^^^
Line 10, column 630, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: It
...h amount of revenue generated from tax. it could be this city has different priori...
^^
Line 13, column 1, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: It
...might be spending it in education. it could be possible the condition of sch...
^^
Line 13, column 25, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...education. it could be possible the condition of schools of bayside have wor...
^^
Line 13, column 64, Rule ID: HAVE_PART_AGREEMENT[1]
Message: Use past participle here: 'worsened'.
Suggestion: worsened
...e condition of schools of bayside have worsen. but need further details, to understan...
^^^^^^
Line 13, column 72, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: But
...tion of schools of bayside have worsen. but need further details, to understand the...
^^^
Line 13, column 176, Rule ID: BEEN_PART_AGREEMENT[1]
Message: Consider using a past participle here: 'ascertained'.
Suggestion: ascertained
... no evidence shared in the letter it is ascertain that government will invest more in edu...
^^^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, first, however, if, may, second, secondly, so, third, thirdly, thus, well, while
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 30.0 19.6327345309 153% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 14.0 12.9520958084 108% => OK
Conjunction : 13.0 11.1786427146 116% => OK
Relative clauses : 7.0 13.6137724551 51% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 24.0 28.8173652695 83% => OK
Preposition: 58.0 55.5748502994 104% => OK
Nominalization: 19.0 16.3942115768 116% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2158.0 2260.96107784 95% => OK
No of words: 426.0 441.139720559 97% => OK
Chars per words: 5.06572769953 5.12650576532 99% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.54310108192 4.56307096286 100% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.71925839103 2.78398813304 98% => OK
Unique words: 224.0 204.123752495 110% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.525821596244 0.468620217663 112% => OK
syllable_count: 666.0 705.55239521 94% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.59920159681 100% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 10.0 4.96107784431 202% => Less pronouns wanted as sentence beginning.
Article: 8.0 8.76447105788 91% => OK
Subordination: 2.0 2.70958083832 74% => OK
Conjunction: 2.0 1.67365269461 119% => OK
Preposition: 2.0 4.22255489022 47% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 25.0 19.7664670659 126% => OK
Sentence length: 17.0 22.8473053892 74% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 44.9110409588 57.8364921388 78% => OK
Chars per sentence: 86.32 119.503703932 72% => OK
Words per sentence: 17.04 23.324526521 73% => OK
Discourse Markers: 3.64 5.70786347227 64% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 16.0 5.25449101796 305% => Less language errors wanted.
Sentences with positive sentiment : 8.0 8.20758483034 97% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 9.0 6.88822355289 131% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 8.0 4.67664670659 171% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.204519837734 0.218282227539 94% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0534288881154 0.0743258471296 72% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0561912964372 0.0701772020484 80% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.107861394993 0.128457276422 84% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0426027289096 0.0628817314937 68% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 11.0 14.3799401198 76% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 54.22 48.3550499002 112% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 7.1628742515 43% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.9 12.197005988 81% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.83 12.5979740519 94% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.56 8.32208582834 103% => OK
difficult_words: 110.0 98.500998004 112% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 7.0 12.3882235529 57% => Linsear_write_formula is low.
gunning_fog: 8.8 11.1389221557 79% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 11.9071856287 76% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Rates: 50.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.