The following appeared in a memo from the vice president of a company that builds shopping malls around the country.
"The surface of a section of Route 101, paved just two years ago by Good Intentions Roadways, is now badly cracked with a number of dangerous potholes. In another part of the state, a section of Route 40, paved by Appian Roadways more than four years ago, is still in good condition. In a demonstration of their continuing commitment to quality, Appian Roadways recently purchased state-of-the-art paving machinery and hired a new quality-control manager. Therefore, I recommend hiring Appian Roadways to construct the access roads for all our new shopping malls. I predict that our Appian access roads will not have to be repaired for at least four years."
In the above memo, the vice president recommends that their company should hire Appian Roadways to construct the roads for all of the new shopping malls. The author supports his argument on the basis of the premise that the roads, which were constructed by the Appian Roadways are still in good condition after four years. However, before evaluating the author’s argument three questions must be answered.
Firstly, is circumstances from one thing can be used to predict and generalise about the other? In other words, are the roads, made by Good Intention Roadways and roads, made by Appian Roadways similar? Maybe the roads, made Good inattention highway is run through the area, where traffics are too much and the amount of rain was too much to handle. On the other hand, the roads, made by the Appian Roadways run through the locality where very few people use vehicles or weather of the area was mostly sunny during the past two years. If the above condition is true then the author’s recommendation holds no water.
Secondly, will purchasing new technologies improve their road standard? Maybe the new technologies malfunction too frequently that, they can not be used on regular basis. On the other hand, hiring a new quality control manager may not improve their work. There is a possibility that to expurgate the ignominy, caused over the past few years, the Good Intension Company may borrow some of the more technically advanced machines, which may help them to rejuvenate their previous reputation. Perhaps the recent technologies are not that much of an advance, maybe ensue of them using the technologies will be pernicious rather than lucrative. If any one of the above scenarios is true then the author’s recommendation is built unreliably.
Thirdly, can past results be used to evaluate and predict the future? In other words, will the Good Intention Roadways never be recovered from their infamy? Maybe the Good Intension Roadway may improve their works and roads quality, and the roads constructed by them may last more than 6-7 years. There is a possibility that after hiring a new manager the work efficiency of the Appian Roadways may decrease. Maybe they will get ignorant about their reputation for continuing commitment or in the future they may face some economic backslash after borrowing costly technologies. If any one of the above scenarios is true then the author’s recommendation is seriously unwarranted.
In the conclusion, the argument as it stands now is considerably flawed due to its reliance on several unwarranted assumptions. If the author is able to answer the three questions above and offer more evidence(perhaps in the form of a systematic research study), then it will be possible to fully evaluate the viability of the proposed recommendation that the Appian access roads will not have to be repaired for at least four years.
Comments
e-rater score report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 4.0 out of 6
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 11 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 7 2
No. of Sentences: 22 15
No. of Words: 474 350
No. of Characters: 2349 1500
No. of Different Words: 212 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.666 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.956 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.714 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 148 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 119 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 92 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 56 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 21.545 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 9.976 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.773 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.316 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.502 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.091 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 124, Rule ID: ALL_OF_THE[1]
Message: Simply use 'all the'.
Suggestion: all the
...ian Roadways to construct the roads for all of the new shopping malls. The author supports...
^^^^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 536, Rule ID: SENTENCE_FRAGMENT[1]
Message: “If” at the beginning of a sentence requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
...mostly sunny during the past two years. If the above condition is true then the au...
^^
Line 5, column 16, Rule ID: DID_BASEFORM[1]
Message: The verb 'will' requires the base form of the verb: 'purchase'
Suggestion: purchase
...tion holds no water. Secondly, will purchasing new technologies improve their road sta...
^^^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 381, Rule ID: SOME_OF_THE[1]
Message: Simply use 'some'.
Suggestion: some
..., the Good Intension Company may borrow some of the more technically advanced machines, whi...
^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 640, Rule ID: SENTENCE_FRAGMENT[1]
Message: “If” at the beginning of a sentence requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
...ll be pernicious rather than lucrative. If any one of the above scenarios is true ...
^^
Line 7, column 167, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...e recovered from their infamy? Maybe the Good Intension Roadway may improve their...
^^
Line 7, column 581, Rule ID: SENTENCE_FRAGMENT[1]
Message: “If” at the beginning of a sentence requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
...sh after borrowing costly technologies. If any one of the above scenarios is true ...
^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
first, firstly, however, if, may, second, secondly, so, still, then, third, thirdly, as to, at least, in other words, on the other hand
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 26.0 19.6327345309 132% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 18.0 12.9520958084 139% => OK
Conjunction : 9.0 11.1786427146 81% => OK
Relative clauses : 11.0 13.6137724551 81% => OK
Pronoun: 24.0 28.8173652695 83% => OK
Preposition: 60.0 55.5748502994 108% => OK
Nominalization: 18.0 16.3942115768 110% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2420.0 2260.96107784 107% => OK
No of words: 474.0 441.139720559 107% => OK
Chars per words: 5.10548523207 5.12650576532 100% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.66599839874 4.56307096286 102% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.80514884585 2.78398813304 101% => OK
Unique words: 218.0 204.123752495 107% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.459915611814 0.468620217663 98% => OK
syllable_count: 742.5 705.55239521 105% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.59920159681 100% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 1.0 4.96107784431 20% => OK
Article: 5.0 8.76447105788 57% => OK
Subordination: 5.0 2.70958083832 185% => OK
Conjunction: 1.0 1.67365269461 60% => OK
Preposition: 7.0 4.22255489022 166% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 22.0 19.7664670659 111% => OK
Sentence length: 21.0 22.8473053892 92% => OK
Sentence length SD: 55.8389989313 57.8364921388 97% => OK
Chars per sentence: 110.0 119.503703932 92% => OK
Words per sentence: 21.5454545455 23.324526521 92% => OK
Discourse Markers: 6.13636363636 5.70786347227 108% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 7.0 5.25449101796 133% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 15.0 8.20758483034 183% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 2.0 6.88822355289 29% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 5.0 4.67664670659 107% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.0852737439578 0.218282227539 39% => The similarity between the topic and the content is low.
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0288415845422 0.0743258471296 39% => Sentence topic similarity is low.
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0414911832858 0.0701772020484 59% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0542423919693 0.128457276422 42% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0360216207079 0.0628817314937 57% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 13.4 14.3799401198 93% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 50.16 48.3550499002 104% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.1628742515 123% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.5 12.197005988 94% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.36 12.5979740519 98% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.01 8.32208582834 96% => OK
difficult_words: 100.0 98.500998004 102% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 10.5 12.3882235529 85% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.4 11.1389221557 93% => OK
text_standard: 12.0 11.9071856287 101% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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It is not exactly right on the topic in the view of e-grader. Maybe there is a wrong essay topic.
Rates: 16.67 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 1.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.