The following appeared as part of an article in a business magazine.
"A recent study rating 300 male and female advertising executives according to the average number of hours they sleep per night showed an association between the amount of sleep the executives need and the success of their firms. Of the advertising firms studied, those whose executives reported needing no more than six hours of sleep per night had higher profit margins and faster growth. On the basis of this study, we recommend that businesses hire only people who need less than six hours of sleep per night."
Write a response in which you discuss what questions would need to be answered in order to decide whether the recommendation and the argument on which it is based are reasonable. Be sure to explain how the answers to these questions would help to evaluate the recommendation.
In the above article, the author argues that the business should hire only people who need less than six hours. The author supports his argument based on a recent study rating 300 male and female executives. However, before the author’s argument is fully evaluated three questions need to be answered.
Firstly, do sleep is the only factor to affects performance? In other words, is it possible to determine the performance of an executive based on a single component? Perhaps there are other factors, which are imperative factors for the enhanced performance of an executive. Maybe the work environment plays a significantly monumental role in a good performance. Perhaps the employee's office regulation is too strict to operate freely, then they may feel congested, and it can affect their performance. If sleep is an important factor to boost performance, then it may not be the same for everyone. Maybe some people operate more creatively if they sleep 8 hours. If anyone of the above scenarios is true, then the author’s argument holds no water.
Secondly, is it appropriate to evaluate some data based on small sample size? The author’s conclusion is based on a survey of 300 executives. Maybe the sample size is too small to evaluate a conclusion. Generalizing some facts based on only 300 people may not be a good strategy. There is a case, where not all executives reported correctly to the survey. Despite sleeping 6 hours at night, they may take certain power naps during office time, which they did not report at the time of the survey. On the other hand, the sample size is too small to evaluate a certain strategy. If any one of the above scenarios is true then the author’s argument is built unreliably.
In the conclusion, the argument as it stands now is considerably flawed due to its reliance on several unwarranted assumptions. If the author can answer the three questions above and offer more evidence(perhaps in the form of a systematic research study), then it will be possible to fully evaluate the viability of the proposed recommendation that businesses hire only people who need less than six hours of sleep per night.
Comments
e-rater score report
need more arguments
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Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 3.5 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 7 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 4 2
No. of Sentences: 21 15
No. of Words: 362 350
No. of Characters: 1743 1500
No. of Different Words: 169 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.362 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.815 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.737 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 117 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 84 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 70 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 42 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 17.238 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 8.303 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.619 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.311 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.485 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.062 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 4 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 41, Rule ID: TO_NON_BASE[1]
Message: The verb after "to" should be in the base form: 'affect'.
Suggestion: affect
...Firstly, do sleep is the only factor to affects performance? In other words, is it poss...
^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 375, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[1]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'employees'' or 'employee's'?
Suggestion: employees'; employee's
...role in a good performance. Perhaps the employees office regulation is too strict to oper...
^^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 578, Rule ID: SENTENCE_FRAGMENT[1]
Message: “If” at the beginning of a sentence requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
...o small to evaluate a certain strategy. If any one of the above scenarios is true ...
^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
first, firstly, however, if, may, second, secondly, so, then, in other words, on the other hand
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 20.0 19.6327345309 102% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 11.0 12.9520958084 85% => OK
Conjunction : 3.0 11.1786427146 27% => More conjunction wanted.
Relative clauses : 7.0 13.6137724551 51% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 15.0 28.8173652695 52% => OK
Preposition: 41.0 55.5748502994 74% => OK
Nominalization: 15.0 16.3942115768 91% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1799.0 2260.96107784 80% => OK
No of words: 362.0 441.139720559 82% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.96961325967 5.12650576532 97% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.36191444098 4.56307096286 96% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.87470328713 2.78398813304 103% => OK
Unique words: 179.0 204.123752495 88% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.494475138122 0.468620217663 106% => OK
syllable_count: 580.5 705.55239521 82% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.59920159681 100% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 1.0 4.96107784431 20% => OK
Article: 5.0 8.76447105788 57% => OK
Subordination: 5.0 2.70958083832 185% => OK
Conjunction: 1.0 1.67365269461 60% => OK
Preposition: 6.0 4.22255489022 142% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 21.0 19.7664670659 106% => OK
Sentence length: 17.0 22.8473053892 74% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 49.0076119776 57.8364921388 85% => OK
Chars per sentence: 85.6666666667 119.503703932 72% => OK
Words per sentence: 17.2380952381 23.324526521 74% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.52380952381 5.70786347227 79% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 5.15768463074 78% => More paragraphs wanted.
Language errors: 3.0 5.25449101796 57% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 7.0 8.20758483034 85% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 5.0 6.88822355289 73% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 9.0 4.67664670659 192% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.166292282171 0.218282227539 76% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0473553934823 0.0743258471296 64% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0507838751197 0.0701772020484 72% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0966657558384 0.128457276422 75% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.021532830074 0.0628817314937 34% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 10.6 14.3799401198 74% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 54.22 48.3550499002 112% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.1628742515 123% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.9 12.197005988 81% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.25 12.5979740519 89% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.75 8.32208582834 93% => OK
difficult_words: 75.0 98.500998004 76% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 7.0 12.3882235529 57% => Linsear_write_formula is low.
gunning_fog: 8.8 11.1389221557 79% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 11.9071856287 76% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Rates: 50.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.