The following appeared in a memorandum from the owner of Movies Galore, a chain of video rental stores.
“In order to reverse the recent decline in our profits, we must reduce operating expenses at Movies Galore’s ten video rental stores. Since we are famous for our special bargains, raising our rental prices is not a viable way to improve profits. Last month our store in downtown Marston significantly decreased its operating expenses by closing at 6:00 P.M. rather than 9:00 P.M. and by reducing its stock by eliminating all movies released more than five years ago. Therefore, in order to increase profits without jeopardizing our reputation for offering great movies at low prices, we recommend implementing similar changes in our other nine Movies Galore stores.”
Write a response in which you discuss what questions would need to be answered in order to decide whether the recommendation is likely to have the predicted result. Be sure to explain how the answers to these questions would help to evaluate the recommendation.
In the argument statement it is suggested that in order to alter the decline in revenues the movie rental stores reduce their maintenance costs by reducing their stocks and operating hours based on the results stemmed from implementation of a similar strategy in one of their chain stores located in downtown Marston. Although the evidence provided to strengthen their argument seems valid, there are serious flaws which would be discussed here.
it is stated that raising rental prices is against the chain store’s moto of always providing the best movie rental price, this is understandable but raising the rental prices is not the only way of increasing revenues. it is possible to expand the chain store’s target market by introducing new products such as renting and selling music or entering the online market by setting up a commercial website to promote their services. By entering new markets and expanding the current market and attracting new customers, as a result, their revenue would increase significantly.
The other claim by the statement is that cutting the maintenance costs through decreasing the working hours and reducing the stocks and further states that the strategy was successful in Marston. it is possible that there are not many customers in Marston and consequently the stores does not need to operate at late hours, however, this could not be true for other stores as they may be located at a more populous location. To make the argument stronger, more information on demographics of other stores’ area could be provided to better understand their situation and devise a strategy for.
The idea of reducing the stocks of old movies could easily backfire simply because people are less willing to buy old movies and more content with renting them. movie Galore should provide more information about their sales in order to manage their stocks. To elucidate, they can analyse their sales or even conduct surveys on their customers to better understand their sales. For example, they may figure out that recent movies are sold more than older ones but rented by fewer people. The chain store can also setup their commercial website and conduct part of their sales online, thus reducing the need of stocking movies in stores as they will be available online.
All in all, the strategy proposed by the chain store may not produce the desired results since the claim and evidences provided are weakly supported. To better support their argument they should provide more information through conducting surveys. also they can enter new markets or expand the current one by entering the online market which as a result will increase their revenues.
Comments
Essay evaluation report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 3.5 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 12 15
No. of Words: 438 350
No. of Characters: 2201 1500
No. of Different Words: 199 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.575 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.025 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.474 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 174 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 121 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 72 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 36 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 36.5 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 18.87 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.583 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.361 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.655 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.067 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 1, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: It
...flaws which would be discussed here. it is stated that raising rental prices is...
^^
Line 3, column 226, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: It
...ot the only way of increasing revenues. it is possible to expand the chain store&a...
^^
Line 5, column 197, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: It
...the strategy was successful in Marston. it is possible that there are not many cus...
^^
Line 7, column 162, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Movie
...ies and more content with renting them. movie Galore should provide more information ...
^^^^^
Line 9, column 249, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Also
...information through conducting surveys. also they can enter new markets or expand th...
^^^^
Line 9, column 249, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: also,
...information through conducting surveys. also they can enter new markets or expand th...
^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, consequently, however, if, may, so, then, thus, for example, such as, as a result
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 19.0 19.6327345309 97% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 17.0 12.9520958084 131% => OK
Conjunction : 16.0 11.1786427146 143% => OK
Relative clauses : 8.0 13.6137724551 59% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 35.0 28.8173652695 121% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 53.0 55.5748502994 95% => OK
Nominalization: 15.0 16.3942115768 91% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2264.0 2260.96107784 100% => OK
No of words: 438.0 441.139720559 99% => OK
Chars per words: 5.16894977169 5.12650576532 101% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.57476223824 4.56307096286 100% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.58523312046 2.78398813304 93% => OK
Unique words: 207.0 204.123752495 101% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.472602739726 0.468620217663 101% => OK
syllable_count: 697.5 705.55239521 99% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.59920159681 100% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 8.0 4.96107784431 161% => OK
Article: 4.0 8.76447105788 46% => OK
Subordination: 2.0 2.70958083832 74% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 1.67365269461 0% => OK
Preposition: 5.0 4.22255489022 118% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 16.0 19.7664670659 81% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 27.0 22.8473053892 118% => OK
Sentence length SD: 57.0645194057 57.8364921388 99% => OK
Chars per sentence: 141.5 119.503703932 118% => OK
Words per sentence: 27.375 23.324526521 117% => OK
Discourse Markers: 5.75 5.70786347227 101% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 6.0 5.25449101796 114% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 9.0 8.20758483034 110% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 4.0 6.88822355289 58% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 3.0 4.67664670659 64% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.129367902209 0.218282227539 59% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0474377843281 0.0743258471296 64% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0478187815229 0.0701772020484 68% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0782522502639 0.128457276422 61% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0377776313288 0.0628817314937 60% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 16.6 14.3799401198 115% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 44.07 48.3550499002 91% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 7.1628742515 43% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 13.8 12.197005988 113% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 13.0 12.5979740519 103% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.91 8.32208582834 107% => OK
difficult_words: 109.0 98.500998004 111% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 18.0 12.3882235529 145% => OK
gunning_fog: 12.8 11.1389221557 115% => OK
text_standard: 13.0 11.9071856287 109% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Rates: 66.67 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 4.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.