The following appeared in a newsletter offering advice to investors Over 80 percent of the respondents to a recent survey indicated a desire to reduce their intake of foods containing fats and cholesterol and today low fat products abound in many food sto

Essay topics:

The following appeared in a newsletter offering advice to investors.

"Over 80 percent of the respondents to a recent survey indicated a desire to reduce their intake of foods containing fats and cholesterol, and today low-fat products abound in many food stores. Since many of the food products currently marketed by Old Dairy Industries are high in fat and cholesterol, the company's sales are likely to diminish greatly and company profits will no doubt decrease. We therefore advise Old Dairy stockholders to sell their shares, and other investors not to purchase stock in this company."

Write a response in which you discuss what questions would need to be answered in order to decide whether the advice and the argument on which it is based are reasonable. Be sure to explain how the answers to these questions would help to evaluate the advice.

In the newsletter author gives us information about some survey where people have showed there desire to reduce intake of fat and cholesterol rich food. Further he tells us that the Old Dairy Industries produce such kind of product, so, they may face heavy reduction in sales and profit margin. Now he is making an universal advice that Old Dairy stockholders must sell their shares and no investors should purchase stocks as well. Though these advice seems to be profitable, but as we give it a deeper look tremendous number of questions arise in ones mind regarding loop holes and assumptions made by author.
Firstly, while explaining scenario author tells us that 80 percent respondents have participated in recent survey. Here, he fails to give detailed information regarding survey that was held. Recent survey is a very ambiguous term as it does not specifies any particular interval of time, how long survey was carried out. Also, he does not specifies number of respondent participating in survey? Where they from certain area? Where they of same ideology to oppose Old Dairy Industries? As such uninformative survey can not be accepted to make any conclusion.
Furthermore, author tells us that in survey respondents indicated desire to reduce intake of fat and cholesterol rich food and take alternative as low fat products. Here he made a very vague assumption that if a respondents tells about his desire, he will definitely follow it. There may be a case that, respondent is addicted to such kind of fat and cholesterol rich food that he may not be able to reduce it's consumption. There is also a possibility that if they are talking to reduce intake they just stop eating those food items and even not go for any low fat products. Thus, due to inadequate proofs and ambiguous statements made by author justification is unacceptable.
At last, author tells us that Old dairy industries market fat and cholesterol rich food products so they may face heavy reduction in sales and profit margin. On this statement we can arise multiple question such as Marketing some product means selling it as well? Do they sell only fat and cholesterol rich dairy products? Do there profit margin depends on only such type of products? If they see decline in profit will they not switch to low fat product as well? All these question proves ambiguity in author's statement.
Finally, we want to make an advice to author to provide with some proper survey details, more proofs and real life situations sufficient to make one confident to adopt his advice.

Votes
Average: 5.7 (2 votes)
Essay Categories

Comments

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 313, Rule ID: EN_A_VS_AN
Message: Use 'a' instead of 'an' if the following word doesn't start with a vowel sound, e.g. 'a sentence', 'a university'
Suggestion: a
...les and profit margin. Now he is making an universal advice that Old Dairy stockho...
^^
Line 1, column 440, Rule ID: THIS_NNS[2]
Message: Did you mean 'this advice' or 'these advices'?
Suggestion: this advice; these advices
... should purchase stocks as well. Though these advice seems to be profitable, but as we give ...
^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 1, column 549, Rule ID: ONES[1]
Message: Did you mean 'one's'?
Suggestion: one's
...tremendous number of questions arise in ones mind regarding loop holes and assumptio...
^^^^
Line 2, column 245, Rule ID: DOES_X_HAS[1]
Message: Did you mean 'specify'? As 'do' is already inflected, the verb cannot also be inflected.
Suggestion: specify
...is a very ambiguous term as it does not specifies any particular interval of time, how lo...
^^^^^^^^^
Line 2, column 245, Rule ID: DID_BASEFORM[3]
Message: The verb 'does' requires base form of the verb: 'specify'
Suggestion: specify
...is a very ambiguous term as it does not specifies any particular interval of time, how lo...
^^^^^^^^^
Line 2, column 339, Rule ID: DOES_X_HAS[1]
Message: Did you mean 'specify'? As 'do' is already inflected, the verb cannot also be inflected.
Suggestion: specify
...rvey was carried out. Also, he does not specifies number of respondent participating in s...
^^^^^^^^^
Line 2, column 339, Rule ID: DID_BASEFORM[3]
Message: The verb 'does' requires base form of the verb: 'specify'
Suggestion: specify
...rvey was carried out. Also, he does not specifies number of respondent participating in s...
^^^^^^^^^
Line 2, column 485, Rule ID: SENTENCE_FRAGMENT[1]
Message: “As” at the beginning of a sentence requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
...deology to oppose Old Dairy Industries? As such uninformative survey can not be ac...
^^
Line 3, column 210, Rule ID: A_PLURAL[1]
Message: Don't use indefinite articles with plural words. Did you mean 'a respondent' or simply 'respondents'?
Suggestion: a respondent; respondents
...he made a very vague assumption that if a respondents tells about his desire, he will definit...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 26, Rule ID: A_UNCOUNTABLE[1]
Message: Uncountable nouns are usually not used with an indefinite article. Use simply 'advice'.
Suggestion: advice
...rs statement. Finally, we want to make an advice to author to provide with some proper s...
^^^^^^^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, finally, first, firstly, furthermore, if, look, may, regarding, so, thus, well, while, kind of, such as

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 12.0 19.6327345309 61% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 10.0 12.9520958084 77% => OK
Conjunction : 14.0 11.1786427146 125% => OK
Relative clauses : 13.0 13.6137724551 95% => OK
Pronoun: 46.0 28.8173652695 160% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 46.0 55.5748502994 83% => OK
Nominalization: 11.0 16.3942115768 67% => OK

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2125.0 2260.96107784 94% => OK
No of words: 431.0 441.139720559 98% => OK
Chars per words: 4.93039443155 5.12650576532 96% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.55637350225 4.56307096286 100% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.71399639917 2.78398813304 97% => OK
Unique words: 219.0 204.123752495 107% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.508120649652 0.468620217663 108% => OK
syllable_count: 676.8 705.55239521 96% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.59920159681 100% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 5.0 4.96107784431 101% => OK
Article: 0.0 8.76447105788 0% => OK
Subordination: 4.0 2.70958083832 148% => OK
Conjunction: 1.0 1.67365269461 60% => OK
Preposition: 3.0 4.22255489022 71% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 23.0 19.7664670659 116% => OK
Sentence length: 18.0 22.8473053892 79% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 43.4190466338 57.8364921388 75% => OK
Chars per sentence: 92.3913043478 119.503703932 77% => OK
Words per sentence: 18.7391304348 23.324526521 80% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.95652173913 5.70786347227 87% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 10.0 5.25449101796 190% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 14.0 8.20758483034 171% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 5.0 6.88822355289 73% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 4.0 4.67664670659 86% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.278319778216 0.218282227539 128% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0809980734358 0.0743258471296 109% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0887985283573 0.0701772020484 127% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.147471417147 0.128457276422 115% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0818281113354 0.0628817314937 130% => OK

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 11.2 14.3799401198 78% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 53.21 48.3550499002 110% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 7.1628742515 43% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 10.3 12.197005988 84% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.31 12.5979740519 90% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.12 8.32208582834 98% => OK
difficult_words: 98.0 98.500998004 99% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 13.5 12.3882235529 109% => OK
gunning_fog: 9.2 11.1389221557 83% => OK
text_standard: 11.0 11.9071856287 92% => OK
What are above readability scores?

---------------------

Rates: 83.33 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 5.0 Out of 6
---------------------
Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.

Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 3.5 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 16 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 4 2
No. of Sentences: 23 15
No. of Words: 431 350
No. of Characters: 2082 1500
No. of Different Words: 211 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.556 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.831 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.656 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 145 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 87 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 71 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 55 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 18.739 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 7.897 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.652 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.304 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.304 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.181 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 1 5