The following appeared in the summary of a study on headaches suffered by the residents of Mentia.
"Salicylates are members of the same chemical family as aspirin, a medicine used to treat headaches. Although many foods are naturally rich in salicylates, for the past several decades, food-processing companies have also been adding salicylates to foods as preservatives. This rise in the commercial use of salicylates has been found to correlate with a steady decline in the average number of headaches reported by participants in our twenty-year study. Recently, food-processing companies have found that salicylates can also be used as flavor additives for foods. With this new use for salicylates, we can expect a continued steady decline in the number of headaches suffered by the average citizen of Mentia."
The argument, increased consumption of salicylate will mitigate the headache is unwarranted because it is based on dubious study and lackes concrete evidences.
First, the author cites a study that establishes a corelation between increased commercial use of salicyliate and steady decline in average number of headaches. In doing so, author assumes, study was impeccable and was conducted by disinterested people. There is possibility of study being influenced by the companies that add salicyliate into the food products. Companies must have tried to rigg the study because Salicyliate is the cheapest alternative.Also, the study states increased use of salicliates reduced average number of headaches. It is being assumed that also the salicylites is being used by humans. It is equally probable that Salicyliate was being used for other purposes, for examle in farming.
Second, since salicyliate is naturally present in food and people are consuming artificial or canned food, it is likely that salicyliate level in their body will be high. almost all drugs have off target effect, salicyliate is no exception. It is assumed that Salicyliate is not toxic at all even when consumed in large quantites.Instead of alleviating headache, consuming salicyliates in large quantities would be counterproductive and thus, weaken the author's arguement.
Third, Salicyliates belong to the family of apirin and is not identical to aspirin which is gives relief from headache. The author assumes that aspirin and salicyliates are identical. Small changes in chemical identity can bring about drastically different effect.It is possible that Salicyliate does not sooths headache and most people who experience relief from headache must have been due to some other cause. Besides headaches do not long last even when untreated and they are sporadically in on and off state for the individual. Therefore, the very assumption on which author bases his argument is flawed.
Finally, there possibilty that companies are promoting the excessive use of salicyliate because it is cheapes flavor additive and preservative.
In Conclusion, the argument, increased use of of salicyliates would mitigate the headaches is flawed because it is based on unwarranted assumption and supported by vague studies.
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Comments
Essay evaluation report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 4.0 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 16 15
No. of Words: 352 350
No. of Characters: 1896 1500
No. of Different Words: 183 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.331 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.386 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.99 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 145 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 114 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 89 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 68 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 22 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 8.544 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.688 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.333 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.609 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.085 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 6 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 2, column 214, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...author assumes, study was impeccable and was conducted by disinterested people. T...
^^
Line 2, column 456, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: Also
...Salicyliate is the cheapest alternative.Also, the study states increased use of sali...
^^^^
Line 3, column 171, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Almost
...liate level in their body will be high. almost all drugs have off target effect, salic...
^^^^^^
Line 3, column 193, Rule ID: HAVE_PART_AGREEMENT[1]
Message: Use past participle here: 'offed'.
Suggestion: offed
...ody will be high. almost all drugs have off target effect, salicyliate is no except...
^^^
Line 3, column 330, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: Instead
...l even when consumed in large quantites.Instead of alleviating headache, consuming sali...
^^^^^^^
Line 4, column 264, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: It
...ring about drastically different effect.It is possible that Salicyliate does not s...
^^
Line 4, column 413, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Besides,
...must have been due to some other cause. Besides headaches do not long last even when un...
^^^^^^^
Line 6, column 44, Rule ID: ENGLISH_WORD_REPEAT_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a word
Suggestion: of
...Conclusion, the argument, increased use of of salicyliates would mitigate the headach...
^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, besides, finally, first, if, second, so, therefore, third, thus, in conclusion
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 33.0 19.6327345309 168% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 7.0 12.9520958084 54% => OK
Conjunction : 13.0 11.1786427146 116% => OK
Relative clauses : 14.0 13.6137724551 103% => OK
Pronoun: 20.0 28.8173652695 69% => OK
Preposition: 43.0 55.5748502994 77% => OK
Nominalization: 10.0 16.3942115768 61% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1941.0 2260.96107784 86% => OK
No of words: 349.0 441.139720559 79% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.56160458453 5.12650576532 108% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.32221490584 4.56307096286 95% => OK
Word Length SD: 3.16900780807 2.78398813304 114% => OK
Unique words: 184.0 204.123752495 90% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.527220630372 0.468620217663 113% => OK
syllable_count: 644.4 705.55239521 91% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.8 1.59920159681 113% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 5.0 4.96107784431 101% => OK
Article: 6.0 8.76447105788 68% => OK
Subordination: 1.0 2.70958083832 37% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 1.67365269461 0% => OK
Preposition: 5.0 4.22255489022 118% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 17.0 19.7664670659 86% => OK
Sentence length: 20.0 22.8473053892 88% => OK
Sentence length SD: 51.9255522434 57.8364921388 90% => OK
Chars per sentence: 114.176470588 119.503703932 96% => OK
Words per sentence: 20.5294117647 23.324526521 88% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.94117647059 5.70786347227 87% => OK
Paragraphs: 6.0 5.15768463074 116% => OK
Language errors: 8.0 5.25449101796 152% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 6.0 8.20758483034 73% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 4.0 6.88822355289 58% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 7.0 4.67664670659 150% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.126109118485 0.218282227539 58% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0453449098477 0.0743258471296 61% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0291502667611 0.0701772020484 42% => Sentences are similar to each other.
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0653687120779 0.128457276422 51% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0289021081867 0.0628817314937 46% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 15.0 14.3799401198 104% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 34.26 48.3550499002 71% => OK
smog_index: 11.2 7.1628742515 156% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 13.5 12.197005988 111% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 14.97 12.5979740519 119% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 9.11 8.32208582834 109% => OK
difficult_words: 99.0 98.500998004 101% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 12.5 12.3882235529 101% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.0 11.1389221557 90% => OK
text_standard: 15.0 11.9071856287 126% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Rates: 66.67 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 4.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.