People's behavior is largely determined by forces not of their own making.
Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the statement and explain your reasoning for the position you take. In developing and supporting your position, you should consider ways in which the statement might or might not hold true and explain how these considerations shape your position.
Individuals behavior is an important factor which deteremines whether he or she will succeed in life. There are large number of external factor which influences the behavior and this ,in turn, shapes the life of an individual. Most people end up becoming product of their circumstance except a few which are genetically gifted among us.
Uncontrallable external factors affect the life of an individual in an unexpcted ways. For instance, the career of an individual after completing 12th standard is largely dictated by parents which in turn are influenced by percieved advantages of taking up particular study. In India, majority of students purse either degree in Engineering or Medical Sciences because their parents wanted them to, not because they have curiosity to find out something. Their parents decision to send their child to undertake Engineering and Medical Sciences was indluenced by the rampant advertisements which ostensibly claim to give a luxurious life. Most colleges are private institutions and their only motivation to found such institution was to make money and not impart quality education. This gives us the rough idea about how one individual's desire to accumulate wealth influenced the career choices of many students. Though there are some parents which give their children a liberty to pursue their own passion, their are smattering of students which make well-infromed decisions. Most of them follow the crowd and end up where they never wanted to be.
From biological perspective behavior is largely determined by the inner wiring of the brain. Significant number of people suffer from neurosis, a mild form of psychiatric disorder. Many of them are unaware of neurotic diseases such as anxiety, depression and obesessive compulsive disorder. Behavior of people afflicted with psychiatric disorder is largely determined by underlying pathology. Though there are medications available to alleviate symtomps, there are some debilitating disorder like depression which have no cure. Most of these disorder either have genetic cause or the result of environment in which a person is nurtured. These factors are totally uncontrollable and makes the life of an individual miserable.
However, there are a few among us which pursue their passion regardless of hardship they face. Most such individuals remains steadfast in the face of uncertainity and persever. For example, Elon Musk, one of the wealthiest man on the Earth, founded companies like Paypal, Tesla and My Space. Warren Buffet,one of the greatest investor of all time, who is also counted among the richest people in the world. These people also have faced hardship but they found a way to circumvent the problem and accomplish their goals. Not all of us posses the qualities like these extraordinarily determined people. Large majority of population is influenced by circumstances.
In conclusion, the demeanor of people is largely influenced by external factors because either they are not genetically gifted or they can not control the factors influenceing their life.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 183, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma, but not before the comma
Suggestion: ,
...r which influences the behavior and this ,in turn, shapes the life of an individua...
^^
Line 2, column 704, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...nstitutions and their only motivation to found such institution was to make money...
^^
Line 2, column 820, Rule ID: ONE_PLURAL[1]
Message: Don't use the numeral 'one' with plural words. Did you mean 'one individual', 'an individual', or simply 'individuals'?
Suggestion: one individual; an individual; individuals
... This gives us the rough idea about how one individuals desire to accumulate wealth influenced ...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 2, column 1007, Rule ID: THEIR_IS[1]
Message: Did you mean 'there'?
Suggestion: there
... a liberty to pursue their own passion, their are smattering of students which make w...
^^^^^
Line 4, column 305, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma
Suggestion: , one
...aypal, Tesla and My Space. Warren Buffet,one of the greatest investor of all time, w...
^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, however, if, so, well, as to, for example, for instance, in conclusion, such as
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 23.0 19.5258426966 118% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 2.0 12.4196629213 16% => OK
Conjunction : 15.0 14.8657303371 101% => OK
Relative clauses : 12.0 11.3162921348 106% => OK
Pronoun: 33.0 33.0505617978 100% => OK
Preposition: 73.0 58.6224719101 125% => OK
Nominalization: 7.0 12.9106741573 54% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2591.0 2235.4752809 116% => OK
No of words: 478.0 442.535393258 108% => OK
Chars per words: 5.42050209205 5.05705443957 107% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.67581127817 4.55969084622 103% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.95951762874 2.79657885939 106% => OK
Unique words: 242.0 215.323595506 112% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.506276150628 0.4932671777 103% => OK
syllable_count: 828.0 704.065955056 118% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.7 1.59117977528 107% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 5.0 6.24550561798 80% => OK
Article: 3.0 4.99550561798 60% => OK
Subordination: 2.0 3.10617977528 64% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 1.77640449438 0% => OK
Preposition: 4.0 4.38483146067 91% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 26.0 20.2370786517 128% => OK
Sentence length: 18.0 23.0359550562 78% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 36.0296557668 60.3974514979 60% => The essay contains lots of sentences with the similar length. More sentence varieties wanted.
Chars per sentence: 99.6538461538 118.986275619 84% => OK
Words per sentence: 18.3846153846 23.4991977007 78% => OK
Discourse Markers: 3.46153846154 5.21951772744 66% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 4.97078651685 101% => OK
Language errors: 5.0 7.80617977528 64% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 12.0 10.2758426966 117% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 7.0 5.13820224719 136% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 7.0 4.83258426966 145% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.168604785673 0.243740707755 69% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0492191469003 0.0831039109588 59% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.044119834913 0.0758088955206 58% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0997412583908 0.150359130593 66% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0304948315324 0.0667264976115 46% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 13.3 14.1392134831 94% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 44.75 48.8420337079 92% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.92365168539 111% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.5 12.1743820225 94% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 14.16 12.1639044944 116% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.92 8.38706741573 106% => OK
difficult_words: 133.0 100.480337079 132% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 9.0 11.8971910112 76% => OK
gunning_fog: 9.2 11.2143820225 82% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 11.7820224719 76% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Rates: 66.67 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 4.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.