The following appeared in the summary of a study on headaches suffered by the residents of Mentia.
"Salicylates are members of the same chemical family as aspirin, a medicine used to treat headaches. Although many foods are naturally rich in salicylates, for the past several decades, food-processing companies have also been adding salicylates to foods as preservatives. This rise in the commercial use of salicylates has been found to correlate with a steady decline in the average number of headaches reported by participants in our twenty-year study. Recently, food-processing companies have found that salicylates can also be used as flavor additives for foods. With this new use for salicylates, we can expect a continued steady decline in the number of headaches suffered by the average citizen of Mentia."
Write a response in which you examine the stated and/or unstated assumptions of the argument. Be sure to explain how the argument depends on these assumptions and what the implications are for the argument if the assumptions prove unwarranted.
In the argument, the author concludes that the continuous use of salicylates in the food as food preservatives and flavor additives will decline the number of headaches suffered by average citizen of Mentia. While it is understandable why the citizen would want the salicylates riched food in their diets, but the argument is rife with holes and assumptions, and thus, not strong enough to conclude on the continuous decline in headaches suffer. The author should provide additional three evidences in order to validate his argument.
First of all, the author assumes that as a same chemical family member as aspirin, salicylates can be used for the same medical purpose as aspirin and it will be as effective as the aspirin. Though aspirin is widely known for its use in reduction in pain and headaches, it is still unknown in the scientific community what exactly aspirin do to human body, wheather it numb the nerve or actually reduce the pain in the body. Compairing with the aspirin in the same effect as salicylates need further evidence that they work the same as aspirin and There is no evidence that salicylates reduce the headaches.
Secondly, the author assuming that food-processing companies adding salicylates as preservatives actually help with headaches and stated that the rise in the commercia use of salicylates will decrease the number of case. But the point is, these are the reported cases that the author are trusting for the correlate study. There are no report on the size of the study or the extant of the study that going on over twenty years. There is no representative or reliability of the study that conducted and author need to present more data to represent his or her argument strongly. Again, there are no evidence on the types of question are asked during the study and how much question was dedicated on the topic. For example, the question may be about what the citizen thought about adding salicylates in the food and there may be some propaganda about how effective salicylates in the headaches reduction and there is no side effect as there are some side effect of aspirin like kidney mal-function from regular dose of medication, which may incline the citizen to look positively in salicylates. The author need to provide liability of the study and the distinct of the question asked to the citizen of Mentia.
Third assumption the author made is that food-processing companies have found another new use of salicylates and they are going to replace the former product they used as flover additives with the salicylates. The author stated that this replacement will be successful like there will be no taste differences or any other side issues about the holl process of replacement. Finally, the author reported that their study model actually will represent the behaviour of the citizen issue with headaches. The citizens reason of the headaches may be due to the ongoing construction of the city which is under development program during 20 years, the sound and construction pollution causes the headaches to the citizen living only around the development area and the study conducted on only to these citizen, which have nothing to do with the salicylates use in the food as preservatives or additives. There are lot to assume about the arguments and author needs to clear his position strongly to validate his or her conclusion.
Citizen of Mentia may be suffering from headaches but the author does not give any evidence about how bad the headaches is and wheather they need immediate medication for there suffering or the headaches cure without any need for medication. The authors have assume a lot without giving the validate explanation of his argument and the relation of salicylates with the headaches and the validity to use in the food.
Comments
e-rater score report
Wrong arguments
===============
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 2.5 out of 6
Category: Poor Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 14 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 11 2
No. of Sentences: 20 15
No. of Words: 634 350
No. of Characters: 3119 1500
No. of Different Words: 235 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 5.018 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.92 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.736 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 217 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 165 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 121 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 84 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 31.7 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 13.289 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.5 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.352 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.406 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.115 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 2 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 115, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...es in the food as food preservatives and flavor additives will decline the number...
^^
Line 2, column 369, Rule ID: IT_VBZ[1]
Message: Did you mean 'numbs'?
Suggestion: numbs
...y aspirin do to human body, wheather it numb the nerve or actually reduce the pain i...
^^^^
Line 3, column 30, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...eadaches. Secondly, the author assuming that food-processing companies adding sa...
^^
Line 3, column 882, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[1]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'headaches'' or 'headache's'?
Suggestion: headaches'; headache's
... about how effective salicylates in the headaches reduction and there is no side effect a...
^^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 789, Rule ID: THIS_NNS[2]
Message: Did you mean 'this citizen' or 'these citizens'?
Suggestion: this citizen; these citizens
...area and the study conducted on only to these citizen, which have nothing to do with the sali...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 6, column 259, Rule ID: HAVE_PART_AGREEMENT[1]
Message: Use past participle here: 'assumed'.
Suggestion: assumed
...y need for medication. The authors have assume a lot without giving the validate expla...
^^^^^^
Line 6, column 287, Rule ID: A_INFINITVE[1]
Message: Probably a wrong construction: a/the + infinitive
...uthors have assume a lot without giving the validate explanation of his argument and the rel...
^^^^^^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
actually, but, finally, first, if, look, may, second, secondly, so, still, third, thus, while, for example, first of all
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 28.0 19.6327345309 143% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 19.0 12.9520958084 147% => OK
Conjunction : 30.0 11.1786427146 268% => Less conjunction wanted
Relative clauses : 15.0 13.6137724551 110% => OK
Pronoun: 33.0 28.8173652695 115% => OK
Preposition: 87.0 55.5748502994 157% => OK
Nominalization: 30.0 16.3942115768 183% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 3167.0 2260.96107784 140% => OK
No of words: 634.0 441.139720559 144% => Less content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.9952681388 5.12650576532 97% => OK
Fourth root words length: 5.01790360848 4.56307096286 110% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.78760356088 2.78398813304 100% => OK
Unique words: 248.0 204.123752495 121% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.391167192429 0.468620217663 83% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 1046.7 705.55239521 148% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.7 1.59920159681 106% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 2.0 4.96107784431 40% => OK
Article: 11.0 8.76447105788 126% => OK
Subordination: 2.0 2.70958083832 74% => OK
Conjunction: 3.0 1.67365269461 179% => OK
Preposition: 1.0 4.22255489022 24% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 20.0 19.7664670659 101% => OK
Sentence length: 31.0 22.8473053892 136% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively long.
Sentence length SD: 81.980165284 57.8364921388 142% => OK
Chars per sentence: 158.35 119.503703932 133% => OK
Words per sentence: 31.7 23.324526521 136% => OK
Discourse Markers: 6.0 5.70786347227 105% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 7.0 5.25449101796 133% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 7.0 8.20758483034 85% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 9.0 6.88822355289 131% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 4.0 4.67664670659 86% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.297589207313 0.218282227539 136% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0993295194782 0.0743258471296 134% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0796446380682 0.0701772020484 113% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.194464729291 0.128457276422 151% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0460330151366 0.0628817314937 73% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 18.0 14.3799401198 125% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 31.55 48.3550499002 65% => OK
smog_index: 11.2 7.1628742515 156% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 16.6 12.197005988 136% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.31 12.5979740519 98% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.26 8.32208582834 99% => OK
difficult_words: 124.0 98.500998004 126% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 14.5 12.3882235529 117% => OK
gunning_fog: 14.4 11.1389221557 129% => OK
text_standard: 15.0 11.9071856287 126% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Write the essay in 30 minutes.
Rates: 66.67 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 4.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.