The following letter is from a group of Linford College alumni to the chair of the art department at the college.
"In a recent survey of college graduates, 90 percent agreed that participating in an internship increased their chances of finding a job after graduation, but last year, only 40 percent of Linford’s graduating art students had completed an internship. Skyway Designs, located in nearby Linford City, is the perfect company for students to intern with for a number of reasons: They offer internships in all of their departments, so every student is sure to find work that they are interested in. Additionally, their internships offer flexible working hours. Finally, Skyway Designs is known for being one of the best in the design business, as over 80 percent of businesses in Linford City have used the services of Skyway Designs for their design needs. Given the vital role that work experience plays in a student’s success after graduation, we recommend that our art department require all art students to complete an internship with Skyway Designs before graduation."
Write a response in which you discuss what questions would need to be answered in order to decide whether the recommendation and the argument on which it is based are reasonable. Be sure to explain how the answers to these questions would help to evaluate the recommendation.
The following letter, from a group of Linford college alumni, to the chair of the art department has included the regulations of internship program from skyway designs where the possibility of finding a job after graduation becomes easier. Initially, the argument looks plausible but at the close inspection, it contains a large number of loopholes which are needed to be explicit clearly in order to make argument valid.
Firstly, the letter talks about the survey of college graduates where 90 percent agreed that participating in an internship increased their chances of finding a job after graduation. The argument fails to provide any relevant data regarding how many college graduates participate in the survey. It also fails to provide the actual number of participants responded as 90 percent out of 10 means 9 or out of 100 means 90. It the respondent were 9 out of 10, it is facile to assume that internship is necessary to get a job. The argument also adds 40 percent of Linford’s graduating art students completed an internship but fails to include how many of them got job.
Secondly, alumni from the group of Linford college has been prejudiced in assuming Skyway designs is the perfect company for students to do internship and they present various reasons in support of their position. The alumni pretense regarding the Skyway provides internship in all department and fails to provide various category of internship they offer inside their company. It is possible that Skyway is famous for media marketing and offer internship in that category only. But, how a science students do internship on that company. Thus, the argument should include all the certitude in which Skyway offer internship. The argument also includes 80 percent of businesses in Linford city have used the service from skyway design for their needs. But, it fails to present any germane information regarding total number of businesses in which skyway design offers services. It may be 8 out of 10 or 80 out of 100 services. Thus, it should be made clear regarding their services so that the student may think of doing internship in their company.
Thirdly, it is undeniable that work experience plays an important role in getting job after graduation but it is overestimated to recommend art students to do internship from Skyway design before graduation in the hope of getting jobs without knowing actual number of cases regarding getting job after doing internship from skyway design. It is not included in the argument either the skyway design renders internship for the art students. For instance, the skyway design is an IT company where they hire employee for design new software or application. It is reckless to recommend art student to do internship in skyway design. Thus, all the points should be explicit in order to make argument valid regarding making student to do internship in Skyway design.
In conclusion, the argument as it stands now does not hold water. It should be explained with a lots of evidences in order to make the argument valid in the form of step wise explanation regarding recommendation of art students in doing internship in Skyway design.
Comments
e-rater score report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 3.5 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 5 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 3 2
No. of Sentences: 23 15
No. of Words: 525 350
No. of Characters: 2598 1500
No. of Different Words: 205 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.787 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.949 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.73 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 209 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 155 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 105 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 67 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 22.826 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 9.756 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.783 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.359 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.539 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.142 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 322, Rule ID: LARGE_NUMBER_OF[1]
Message: Specify a number, remove phrase, or simply use 'many' or 'numerous'
Suggestion: many; numerous
...ut at the close inspection, it contains a large number of loopholes which are needed to be explic...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 7, column 476, Rule ID: DT_PRP[1]
Message: Possible typo. Did you mean 'an' or 'IT'?
Suggestion: an; IT
...nts. For instance, the skyway design is an IT company where they hire employee for de...
^^^^^
Line 7, column 482, Rule ID: IT_VBZ[1]
Message: Did you mean 'companies'?
Suggestion: companies
...or instance, the skyway design is an IT company where they hire employee for design new...
^^^^^^^
Line 9, column 95, Rule ID: A_PLURAL[1]
Message: Don't use indefinite articles with plural words. Did you mean 'a lot' or simply 'lots'?
Suggestion: a lot; lots
...hold water. It should be explained with a lots of evidences in order to make the argum...
^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, first, firstly, look, may, regarding, second, secondly, so, third, thirdly, thus, for instance, in conclusion
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 18.0 19.6327345309 92% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 6.0 12.9520958084 46% => OK
Conjunction : 9.0 11.1786427146 81% => OK
Relative clauses : 13.0 13.6137724551 95% => OK
Pronoun: 32.0 28.8173652695 111% => OK
Preposition: 90.0 55.5748502994 162% => OK
Nominalization: 25.0 16.3942115768 152% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2656.0 2260.96107784 117% => OK
No of words: 525.0 441.139720559 119% => OK
Chars per words: 5.05904761905 5.12650576532 99% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.78673985869 4.56307096286 105% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.78317328148 2.78398813304 100% => OK
Unique words: 212.0 204.123752495 104% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.40380952381 0.468620217663 86% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 814.5 705.55239521 115% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.59920159681 100% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 12.0 4.96107784431 242% => Less pronouns wanted as sentence beginning.
Article: 10.0 8.76447105788 114% => OK
Subordination: 0.0 2.70958083832 0% => More adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 0.0 1.67365269461 0% => OK
Preposition: 3.0 4.22255489022 71% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 23.0 19.7664670659 116% => OK
Sentence length: 22.0 22.8473053892 96% => OK
Sentence length SD: 64.9801772886 57.8364921388 112% => OK
Chars per sentence: 115.47826087 119.503703932 97% => OK
Words per sentence: 22.8260869565 23.324526521 98% => OK
Discourse Markers: 5.21739130435 5.70786347227 91% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 4.0 5.25449101796 76% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 6.0 8.20758483034 73% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 11.0 6.88822355289 160% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 6.0 4.67664670659 128% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.320397852212 0.218282227539 147% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.104207303203 0.0743258471296 140% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.133065573549 0.0701772020484 190% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.201714972461 0.128457276422 157% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.131968933584 0.0628817314937 210% => More connections among paragraphs wanted.
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 13.8 14.3799401198 96% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 49.15 48.3550499002 102% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 7.1628742515 43% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.9 12.197005988 98% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.36 12.5979740519 98% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.86 8.32208582834 94% => OK
difficult_words: 104.0 98.500998004 106% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 13.5 12.3882235529 109% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.8 11.1389221557 97% => OK
text_standard: 14.0 11.9071856287 118% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Rates: 66.67 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 4.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.