The following is a recommendation from the Board of Directors of Monarch Books.
"We recommend that Monarch Books open a café in its store. Monarch, having been in business at the same location for more than twenty years, has a large customer base because it is known for its wide selection of books on all subjects. Clearly, opening the café would attract more customers. Space could be made for the café by discontinuing the children's book section, which will probably become less popular given that the most recent national census indicated a significant decline in the percentage of the population under age ten. Opening a café will allow Monarch to attract more customers and better compete with Regal Books, which recently opened its own café."
Write a response in which you discuss what questions would need to be answered in order to decide whether the recommendation is likely to have the predicted result. Be sure to explain how the answers to these questions would help to evaluate the recommendation.
The Board of Directors of Monarch Books have recommended to open a café in the store in order to attract more customers. They feel that the store already has a large customer base because of the wide selection of books and opening a café would increase the customers. This recommendation could be evaluated only after answering a few questions.
Firstly, would people be attracted by opening a café in a bookstore? They might not like the idea of a café in a place to read books. Also, what would be the pricing of items in the café and would they actually buy them? If the items available are expensive then they might not purchase them and the store may not get profits from the café.
Moreover, is opening the café worth replacing the children’s book section? If the sales of children’s books was more than the café then it would not be worth it. According to the recent national census, there would be a decline in the percentage of population under age ten. Even if this decline occurs, would the popularity and the sales of children’s books decrease? There is no way to predict the dip in sales.
Also, if Regal Books also opened a café in their store, would opening a café in Monarch books store give them competition? There are chances that the café might do well in Regal Book store but not in Monarch Book store.
Hence, only after we find the answers to the above questions could we evaluate the effectiveness of the recommendation given by the Board of Directors of Monarch Books.
Comments
e-rater score report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 3.5 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 15 15
No. of Words: 267 350
No. of Characters: 1199 1500
No. of Different Words: 126 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.042 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.491 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.467 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 59 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 54 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 34 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 26 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 17.8 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 5.357 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.6 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.379 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.618 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.161 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 5, column 76, Rule ID: SENTENCE_FRAGMENT[1]
Message: “If” at the beginning of a sentence requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
... replacing the children’s book section? If the sales of children’s books was more ...
^^
Line 7, column 63, Rule ID: DID_BASEFORM[1]
Message: The verb 'would' requires the base form of the verb: 'open'
Suggestion: open
...lso opened a café in their store, would opening a café in Monarch books store give them...
^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
actually, also, but, first, firstly, hence, if, may, moreover, so, then, well
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 10.0 19.6327345309 51% => More to be verbs wanted.
Auxiliary verbs: 14.0 12.9520958084 108% => OK
Conjunction : 5.0 11.1786427146 45% => More conjunction wanted.
Relative clauses : 2.0 13.6137724551 15% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 16.0 28.8173652695 56% => OK
Preposition: 39.0 55.5748502994 70% => OK
Nominalization: 6.0 16.3942115768 37% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1257.0 2260.96107784 56% => More number of characters wanted.
No of words: 267.0 441.139720559 61% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.70786516854 5.12650576532 92% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.04229324003 4.56307096286 89% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.59319416508 2.78398813304 93% => OK
Unique words: 127.0 204.123752495 62% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.475655430712 0.468620217663 102% => OK
syllable_count: 382.5 705.55239521 54% => syllable counts are too short.
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.4 1.59920159681 88% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 3.0 4.96107784431 60% => OK
Article: 1.0 8.76447105788 11% => OK
Subordination: 4.0 2.70958083832 148% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 1.67365269461 0% => OK
Preposition: 1.0 4.22255489022 24% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 15.0 19.7664670659 76% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 17.0 22.8473053892 74% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 31.769587134 57.8364921388 55% => The essay contains lots of sentences with the similar length. More sentence varieties wanted.
Chars per sentence: 83.8 119.503703932 70% => OK
Words per sentence: 17.8 23.324526521 76% => OK
Discourse Markers: 5.13333333333 5.70786347227 90% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 2.0 5.25449101796 38% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 6.0 8.20758483034 73% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 4.0 6.88822355289 58% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 5.0 4.67664670659 107% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.369565268331 0.218282227539 169% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.133025111136 0.0743258471296 179% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.126430171951 0.0701772020484 180% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.221045278408 0.128457276422 172% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.121302665132 0.0628817314937 193% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 9.7 14.3799401198 67% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 71.14 48.3550499002 147% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 7.1628742515 43% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 7.6 12.197005988 62% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 9.74 12.5979740519 77% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.38 8.32208582834 89% => OK
difficult_words: 49.0 98.500998004 50% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 8.0 12.3882235529 65% => OK
gunning_fog: 8.8 11.1389221557 79% => OK
text_standard: 8.0 11.9071856287 67% => The average readability is low. Need to imporve the language.
What are above readability scores?
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Rates: 50.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.