The following recommendation was made by the president and administrative staff of Grove College, a private institution, to the college's governing committee.
"We recommend that Grove College preserve its century-old tradition of all-female education rather than admit men into its programs. It is true that a majority of faculty members voted in favor of coeducation, arguing that it would encourage more students to apply to Grove. But 80 percent of the students responding to a survey conducted by the student government wanted the school to remain all female, and over half of the alumnae who answered a separate survey also opposed coeducation. Keeping the college all female will improve morale among students and convince alumnae to keep supporting the college financially."
Write a response in which you discuss what questions would need to be answered in order to decide whether the recommendation is likely to have the predicted result. Be sure to explain how the answers to these questions would help to evaluate the recommendation.
The author states that by keeping its tradition of all-female education, Grove College will improve the morale among students and keep their financial support from its alumnae. However, in order to substantiate the claim, there are a few questions that need to be answered.
First, it is mentioned in the recommendation that about 80 percent of the students said that they wanted the school remain all female based on a survey conducted by the student government. Yet, how was the survey conducted? It is possible that due to the inexperience of the student government, there are some obvious flaws in the survey. For example, the total number of students that involved in the survey might be quite small because the student government just randomly asked students on the streets. Since most of the students on the streets were on their ways to the classrooms and were almost late, many people didn't want to answer the question.
Second, the author says that by keeping the school's tradition, it will improve the students' morale. However, does all-female education really tend to have better morale among their students than coeducation? It is likely that having only women or men in a school would make the students more likely to compete in a wrong way. For example, finding a mate is quite a crucial thing for students in Taiwan. If the students in one school are all female, it is likely that they would backbite each other to undermine their opponents.
Also, the author also claims that holding the tradition could keep the financial support from the alumnae. Nevertheless, does those alumnae who donate to the school are the same group of people that uphold the tradition? It might be possible that most of the alumnae who oppose coeducation don't make any contribution to make Grove College better. On the contrary, most of the people who support the school financially want the school to be better and one of the best ways to improve the make it better is to adopt coeducation. If the school keeps its tradition, they would probably feel disappointed, leading them decrease their donation.
The author argues that keeping the tradition of all-female education is important for Grove College in terms of the morale among the students and financial support from the alumnae. However, the author needs to answer the above questions first to justify his claim.
Comments
e-rater score report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 3.5 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 9 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 3 2
No. of Sentences: 19 15
No. of Words: 399 350
No. of Characters: 1927 1500
No. of Different Words: 170 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.469 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.83 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.473 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 145 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 97 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 60 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 37 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 21 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 7.004 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.632 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.34 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.568 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.105 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 620, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: didn't
...rooms and were almost late, many people didnt want to answer the question. Second...
^^^^^
Line 5, column 45, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[2]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'schools'' or 'school's'?
Suggestion: schools'; school's
...nd, the author says that by keeping the schools tradition, it will improve the students...
^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 84, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[2]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'students'' or 'student's'?
Suggestion: students'; student's
... schools tradition, it will improve the students morale. However, does all-female educat...
^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 311, Rule ID: IN_A_X_MANNER[1]
Message: Consider replacing "in a wrong way" with adverb for "wrong"; eg, "in a hasty manner" with "hastily".
...ake the students more likely to compete in a wrong way. For example, finding a mate is quite a...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 529, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...ach other to undermine their opponents. Also, the author also claims that holdin...
^^^^^^
Line 7, column 291, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: don't
...t of the alumnae who oppose coeducation dont make any contribution to make Grove Col...
^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, first, however, if, nevertheless, really, second, so, for example, on the contrary
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 18.0 19.6327345309 92% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 9.0 12.9520958084 69% => OK
Conjunction : 5.0 11.1786427146 45% => More conjunction wanted.
Relative clauses : 16.0 13.6137724551 118% => OK
Pronoun: 34.0 28.8173652695 118% => OK
Preposition: 52.0 55.5748502994 94% => OK
Nominalization: 20.0 16.3942115768 122% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1980.0 2260.96107784 88% => OK
No of words: 397.0 441.139720559 90% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.98740554156 5.12650576532 97% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.46372701284 4.56307096286 98% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.57281328185 2.78398813304 92% => OK
Unique words: 180.0 204.123752495 88% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.453400503778 0.468620217663 97% => OK
syllable_count: 601.2 705.55239521 85% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.59920159681 94% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 7.0 4.96107784431 141% => OK
Article: 6.0 8.76447105788 68% => OK
Subordination: 3.0 2.70958083832 111% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 1.67365269461 0% => OK
Preposition: 3.0 4.22255489022 71% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 19.0 19.7664670659 96% => OK
Sentence length: 20.0 22.8473053892 88% => OK
Sentence length SD: 39.6721327426 57.8364921388 69% => OK
Chars per sentence: 104.210526316 119.503703932 87% => OK
Words per sentence: 20.8947368421 23.324526521 90% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.89473684211 5.70786347227 86% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 6.0 5.25449101796 114% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 8.0 8.20758483034 97% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 4.0 6.88822355289 58% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 7.0 4.67664670659 150% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.131392275427 0.218282227539 60% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0434168545002 0.0743258471296 58% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0641952021457 0.0701772020484 91% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0962037030187 0.128457276422 75% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0582153164048 0.0628817314937 93% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 12.5 14.3799401198 87% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 59.64 48.3550499002 123% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 7.1628742515 43% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.9 12.197005988 81% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.66 12.5979740519 93% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.49 8.32208582834 90% => OK
difficult_words: 72.0 98.500998004 73% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 11.0 12.3882235529 89% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.0 11.1389221557 90% => OK
text_standard: 10.0 11.9071856287 84% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Rates: 66.67 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 4.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.