An international development organization, in response to a vitamin A deficiency among people in the impoverished nation of Tagus, has engineered a new breed of millet high in vitamin A. While seeds for this new type of millet cost more, farmers will be paid subsidies for farming the new variety of millet. Since millet is already a staple food in Tagus, people will readily adopt the new variety. To combat vitamin A deficiency, the government of Tagus should do everything it can to promote this new type of millet.
Write a response in which you discuss what questions would need to be answered to decide whether the recommendation is likely to have the predicted result. Be sure to explain how the answers to these questions would help to evaluate the recommendation.
In brief, the author of this paragraph mentions that the impoverished nation of Tagus suffers from Vitamin A deficiency. In turn, an international development organization has created a new breed of millet to combat this deficiency. The argument is made that this millet should be readily adopted by citizens and promoted heavily by the government, since millet is a crop that is already a staple food and it will help combat the Vitamin A deficiency in the Tagus region. This argument is undermined by several claims that are made in the passage.
To begin with, we don't have much information on this international organization. We need to know what their main goal is? We also need to know how specifically are they committed to the Tagus region and improving the impoverished position the citizens are in. We also need to know, because they engineered this millet, are they looking for some sort of profit or gain on their end. In answering these questions we can better understand this international development organization and how committed they are to solving this issue in Tagus by continuing to produce the millet. If the government were to partner with this organization, then we want to know that there would be some continuity or permanence in their solution.
We also don't know much about this reengineered millet? Has this new millet been tested in research facilities or on a small sub-group of the Tagus/people similar in genetics to the Tagus? How effective has it been in these case studies or research? In answering these questions, we will better be able to evaluate whether these new millets are worth the higher costs for farmers and will provide the relief that this international development org is processing. Additionally, through this testing we will also be able to gauge the reaction of the Tagus or of similar individuals to genetically modified goods/reengineered goods. Although millet is a staple food, it may not be the case that the Tagus people will be accepting of a slightly modified millet, whose contents and modifications are unknown.
In conducting our testing, it would also be important to better understand the mindset of the Tagus people either through surveys, observations, or first-hand interviews. Through these evaluations we could better understand how open are the Tagus people to reengineered goods? How open are they change? How conservative or liberal is their culture and are there major differences between men and women or young and old? Through these surveys we may find that is Vitamin A deficiency is such a dire case that the Tagus people are willing to try anything new to fix their community. Or perhaps they are struggling under major political violence, so this is really not a first priority. Understanding the social context is crucial to a new implementation.
Even if they society were to be accepting of the new crops and although farmers are being paid subsidies, it simply may not be that easy to execute the production of new crops. Perhaps there are things that we are unaware of regarding the crops - Do farmers have the correct resources to farm this type of millet? Will they need more land and are they able to find that? Do farmers needs to learn any new skills to farm this crop and are they willing to do that? Will farmers be able to upkeep their profit with this new kind of millet? Answering these questions will help us understand the ability of farmers to even implement a new millet, despite whether they agree to change the millet they farm.
Finally, I think it is important to reflect on the government and the promotion. Even if the Tagus community were to realize that this crop is effective and they want to advocate for its use, the government may not necessarily agree. We also need to build a better understanding of what the government's concerns really are - Do they have other priorities? Do they have the money for this promotion? How costly will this partnership be in giving out subsidies? What needs to be cut to provide these subsidies. Although government's goal is to provide for the people , there is so much more to politics than what meets the eye.
Almost every single sentence of this argument is flawed and has several questions that need to be answered prior to portraying a strong argument that government should step in and promote this new millet.
Comments
Essay evaluation report
samples:
https://www.testbig.com/gmatgre-argument-task-essays/international-deve…
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Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 3.0 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 37 15
No. of Words: 744 350
No. of Characters: 3556 1500
No. of Different Words: 283 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 5.223 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.78 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.736 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 237 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 180 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 119 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 89 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 20.108 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 8.804 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.486 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.254 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.481 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.171 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 7 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 19, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: don't
...e in the passage. To begin with, we dont have much information on this internati...
^^^^
Line 3, column 261, Rule ID: ENGLISH_WORD_REPEAT_BEGINNING_RULE
Message: Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Reword the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
...overished position the citizens are in. We also need to know, because they enginee...
^^
Line 5, column 9, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: don't
...rmanence in their solution. We also dont know much about this reengineered mille...
^^^^
Line 11, column 564, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma, but not before the comma
Suggestion: ,
...nments goal is to provide for the people , there is so much more to politics than ...
^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, finally, first, if, look, may, really, regarding, so, then, i think, in brief, kind of, sort of, to begin with
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 54.0 19.6327345309 275% => Less to be verbs wanted.
Auxiliary verbs: 25.0 12.9520958084 193% => OK
Conjunction : 25.0 11.1786427146 224% => Less conjunction wanted
Relative clauses : 17.0 13.6137724551 125% => OK
Pronoun: 90.0 28.8173652695 312% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 94.0 55.5748502994 169% => OK
Nominalization: 28.0 16.3942115768 171% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 3639.0 2260.96107784 161% => OK
No of words: 740.0 441.139720559 168% => Less content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.91756756757 5.12650576532 96% => OK
Fourth root words length: 5.21564387372 4.56307096286 114% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.84468786646 2.78398813304 102% => OK
Unique words: 295.0 204.123752495 145% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.398648648649 0.468620217663 85% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 1131.3 705.55239521 160% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.59920159681 94% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 12.0 4.96107784431 242% => Less pronouns wanted as sentence beginning.
Article: 4.0 8.76447105788 46% => OK
Subordination: 7.0 2.70958083832 258% => Less adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 2.0 1.67365269461 119% => OK
Preposition: 11.0 4.22255489022 261% => Less preposition wanted as sentence beginnings.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 37.0 19.7664670659 187% => OK
Sentence length: 20.0 22.8473053892 88% => OK
Sentence length SD: 53.1937484313 57.8364921388 92% => OK
Chars per sentence: 98.3513513514 119.503703932 82% => OK
Words per sentence: 20.0 23.324526521 86% => OK
Discourse Markers: 3.13513513514 5.70786347227 55% => More transition words/phrases wanted.
Paragraphs: 7.0 5.15768463074 136% => Less paragraphs wanted.
Language errors: 4.0 5.25449101796 76% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 18.0 8.20758483034 219% => Less positive sentences wanted.
Sentences with negative sentiment : 7.0 6.88822355289 102% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 12.0 4.67664670659 257% => Less facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.38143512559 0.218282227539 175% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.100880564961 0.0743258471296 136% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0778118602084 0.0701772020484 111% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.202318562902 0.128457276422 157% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0865485397431 0.0628817314937 138% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 11.7 14.3799401198 81% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 59.64 48.3550499002 123% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.1628742515 123% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.9 12.197005988 81% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.26 12.5979740519 89% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.68 8.32208582834 92% => OK
difficult_words: 143.0 98.500998004 145% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 12.0 12.3882235529 97% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.0 11.1389221557 90% => OK
text_standard: 12.0 11.9071856287 101% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Write the essay in 30 minutes.
Maximum six paragraphs wanted.
Rates: 50.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.