An international development organization, in response to a vitamin A deficiency among people in the impoverished nation of Tagus, has engineered a new breed of millet high in vitamin A. While seeds for this new type of millet cost more, farmers will be paid subsidies for farming the new variety of millet. Since millet is already a staple food in Tagus, people will readily adopt the new variety. To combat vitamin A deficiency, the government of Tagus should do everything it can to promote this new type of millet.
The author concludes that, to combat vitamin A deficiency, it is necessary to promote the new type millet which is enriched with Vitamin A. However there are some other points need to be mentioned.
The statement made above is based on the assumption that, the new type of millet is rich enough with vitamin A to eradicate the health crisis. Since millet is already a staple food in Tagus, people will easily accept the new form. Also, the government will pay subsidies for the high price of new millet seeds. So, the author hopefully predicts that the new millet program will result in success.
There are several flaws in the above conclusion. First of all, there is no evidence of the actual reason behind the vitamin A deficiency. It may happen due to some other obscure diseases for which vitamin A of their body is declining. In this case, taking high vitamin A millet might not solve the issue. Also, the probability of successful harvest of this new type millet in abundant, is not stated. Farmers may face many difficulties for the first time and likely to produce a poor amount of the crops. Consequently the price may still be high even after government subsidies due to low supply which eventually will not inspire people to buy the new millet.
So, in order to make the project successful, the factors mentioned in the above passage, should be analysed. The government health department should find out the real reason of vitamin A deficiency and at the same time to the agriculture department needs to launch program to train the farmers about harvesting this new seeds.
Comments
Essay evaluation report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: ??? out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 14 15
No. of Words: 274 350
No. of Characters: 1281 1500
No. of Different Words: 143 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.069 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.675 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.451 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 92 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 57 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 34 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 28 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 19.571 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 7.762 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.643 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.36 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.546 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.07 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 4 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 9, column 506, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Consequently,
... to produce a poor amount of the crops. Consequently the price may still be high even after ...
^^^^^^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, consequently, first, however, if, may, so, still, first of all
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 13.0 19.6327345309 66% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 11.0 12.9520958084 85% => OK
Conjunction : 2.0 11.1786427146 18% => More conjunction wanted.
Relative clauses : 6.0 13.6137724551 44% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 9.0 28.8173652695 31% => OK
Preposition: 40.0 55.5748502994 72% => OK
Nominalization: 8.0 16.3942115768 49% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1326.0 2260.96107784 59% => More number of characters wanted.
No of words: 274.0 441.139720559 62% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.83941605839 5.12650576532 94% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.0685311056 4.56307096286 89% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.52141977364 2.78398813304 91% => OK
Unique words: 141.0 204.123752495 69% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.514598540146 0.468620217663 110% => OK
syllable_count: 419.4 705.55239521 59% => syllable counts are too short.
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.59920159681 94% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 2.0 4.96107784431 40% => OK
Article: 8.0 8.76447105788 91% => OK
Subordination: 1.0 2.70958083832 37% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 1.67365269461 0% => OK
Preposition: 4.0 4.22255489022 95% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 15.0 19.7664670659 76% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 18.0 22.8473053892 79% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 41.7913334982 57.8364921388 72% => OK
Chars per sentence: 88.4 119.503703932 74% => OK
Words per sentence: 18.2666666667 23.324526521 78% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.53333333333 5.70786347227 79% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 5.15768463074 78% => More paragraphs wanted.
Language errors: 1.0 5.25449101796 19% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 9.0 8.20758483034 110% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 3.0 6.88822355289 44% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 3.0 4.67664670659 64% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.393125139219 0.218282227539 180% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.128483275133 0.0743258471296 173% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0771450736244 0.0701772020484 110% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.236746583894 0.128457276422 184% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.081494523091 0.0628817314937 130% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 10.5 14.3799401198 73% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 61.67 48.3550499002 128% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 7.1628742515 43% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.1 12.197005988 75% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 10.79 12.5979740519 86% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.76 8.32208582834 93% => OK
difficult_words: 56.0 98.500998004 57% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 8.0 12.3882235529 65% => OK
gunning_fog: 9.2 11.1389221557 83% => OK
text_standard: 8.0 11.9071856287 67% => The average readability is low. Need to imporve the language.
What are above readability scores?
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Rates: 50.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.