An international development organization, in response to a vitamin A deficiency among people in the impoverished nation of Tagus, has engineered a new breed of millet high in vitamin A. While seeds for this new type of millet cost more, farmers will be paid subsidies for farming the new variety of millet. Since millet is already a staple food in Tagus, people will readily adopt the new variety. To combat vitamin A deficiency, the government of Tagus should do everything it can to promote this new type of millet.
Write a response in which you discuss what questions would need to be answered to decide whether the recommendation is likely to have the predicted result. Be sure to explain how the answers to these questions would help to evaluate the recommendation.
The above argument is about a decision from an international development organization to introduce a new breed of millet in the nation of Tagus in order to combat vitamin A deficiency among people in the Tagus. An overlook at the argument might seem cogent but it requires deeper look to show that it is flawed.
Firstly, The author explains that people of Tagus are deficient of Vitamin A but he did not offer any reason for that. It is not given anywhere that the deficiency is due to a lack of vitamin A in food. There might be some other condition in Tagus that is causing this despite the rich vitamin A diet of people. If this is the case, consuming more of the vitamin A high would not help people of Tagus and it would create a financial problem in an impoverished country.
Secondly, Seeds high in vitamin A does not necessarily mean that the crops are also high in vitamin A. There is no information given about the vitamin levels in the crops. Information about any research conducted on the millet seeds would be useful. If the food from these seeds does not contain vitamin A levels greater than that of their usual food then feeding on these seeds would not be any help for people of Tagus.
Moreover, there is no comparison between the vitamin A levels in this new breed of millet seeds and general millet seeds. If the usual millet seeds have abundant levels of the vitamin then eating food with more vitamins does not help the deficiency in any way. A clear comparison table between the nutrient levels of new breed millet seeds and usual millet seeds would be useful to the argument.
lastly, there is no other nutrient information given about the new breed seeds. If they are rich in vitamin A but lead to a deficiency of other vitamins or minerals, Tagus would end up with a bigger problem. Though it has high levels of vitamin A, the new breed millet seeds should also appropriate levels of other vital nutrients.
Better research for the reason for this deficiency would be helpful to identify the problem and to take the required measures to overcome. Without better research the new breed millet could not be proven to be useful. They might end up creating bigger problems for people of Tagus.
Comments
Essay evaluation report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: ??? out of 6
Category: Poor Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 18 15
No. of Words: 396 350
No. of Characters: 1792 1500
No. of Different Words: 152 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.461 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.525 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.379 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 119 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 76 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 48 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 23 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 22 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 6.928 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.556 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.387 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.64 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.127 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 6 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 7, column 76, Rule ID: A_BUT[1]
Message: Did you mean 'a bit'?
Suggestion: A bit
...eople of Tagus are deficient of Vitamin A but he did not offer any reason for that. I...
^^^^^
Line 11, column 33, Rule ID: A_PLURAL[1]
Message: Don't use indefinite articles with plural words. Did you mean 'A doe' or simply 'does'?
Suggestion: A doe; Does
...y. Secondly, Seeds high in vitamin A does not necessarily mean that the crops are...
^^^^^^
Line 11, column 305, Rule ID: A_PLURAL[1]
Message: Don't use indefinite articles with plural words. Did you mean 'A level' or simply 'levels'?
Suggestion: A level; Levels
...om these seeds does not contain vitamin A levels greater than that of their usual food t...
^^^^^^^^
Line 15, column 54, Rule ID: A_PLURAL[1]
Message: Don't use indefinite articles with plural words. Did you mean 'A level' or simply 'levels'?
Suggestion: A level; Levels
...re is no comparison between the vitamin A levels in this new breed of millet seeds and g...
^^^^^^^^
Line 15, column 123, Rule ID: SENTENCE_FRAGMENT[1]
Message: “If” at the beginning of a sentence requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
... millet seeds and general millet seeds. If the usual millet seeds have abundant le...
^^
Line 19, column 1, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Lastly
...s would be useful to the argument. lastly, there is no other nutrient information...
^^^^^^
Line 19, column 109, Rule ID: A_BUT[1]
Message: Did you mean 'a bit'?
Suggestion: A bit
...reed seeds. If they are rich in vitamin A but lead to a deficiency of other vitamins ...
^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, first, firstly, if, lastly, look, moreover, second, secondly, so, then
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 19.0 19.6327345309 97% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 12.0 12.9520958084 93% => OK
Conjunction : 8.0 11.1786427146 72% => OK
Relative clauses : 7.0 13.6137724551 51% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 22.0 28.8173652695 76% => OK
Preposition: 58.0 55.5748502994 104% => OK
Nominalization: 9.0 16.3942115768 55% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1853.0 2260.96107784 82% => OK
No of words: 396.0 441.139720559 90% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.67929292929 5.12650576532 91% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.46091344257 4.56307096286 98% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.42561382716 2.78398813304 87% => OK
Unique words: 152.0 204.123752495 74% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.383838383838 0.468620217663 82% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 579.6 705.55239521 82% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.59920159681 94% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 2.0 4.96107784431 40% => OK
Article: 5.0 8.76447105788 57% => OK
Subordination: 5.0 2.70958083832 185% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 1.67365269461 0% => OK
Preposition: 1.0 4.22255489022 24% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 19.0 19.7664670659 96% => OK
Sentence length: 20.0 22.8473053892 88% => OK
Sentence length SD: 36.9912769533 57.8364921388 64% => OK
Chars per sentence: 97.5263157895 119.503703932 82% => OK
Words per sentence: 20.8421052632 23.324526521 89% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.26315789474 5.70786347227 75% => OK
Paragraphs: 6.0 5.15768463074 116% => OK
Language errors: 7.0 5.25449101796 133% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 7.0 8.20758483034 85% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 10.0 6.88822355289 145% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 2.0 4.67664670659 43% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.480584152717 0.218282227539 220% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.166212782475 0.0743258471296 224% => Sentence topic similarity is high.
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0850131662642 0.0701772020484 121% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.272572920803 0.128457276422 212% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0439804744286 0.0628817314937 70% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 11.0 14.3799401198 76% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 59.64 48.3550499002 123% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 7.1628742515 43% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.9 12.197005988 81% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 9.86 12.5979740519 78% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.22 8.32208582834 87% => OK
difficult_words: 65.0 98.500998004 66% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 11.0 12.3882235529 89% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.0 11.1389221557 90% => OK
text_standard: 10.0 11.9071856287 84% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Rates: 50.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.