In order to reverse the recent decline in our profits, we must reduce operating expenses at Movies Galore’s ten video rental stores. Since we are famous for our special bargains, raising our rental prices is not a viable way to improve profits. Last month our store in downtown Marston significantly decreased its operating expenses by closing at 6:00 P.M. rather than 9:00 P.M. and by reducing its stock by eliminating all movies released more than five years ago. Therefore, in order to increase profits without jeopardizing our reputation for offering great movies at low prices, we recommend implementing similar changes in our other nine Movies Galore stores.
I can spot numerous logical fallacies just after reading the first two sentences of the argument and I would pose a few valid questions as to why the implementation of an absurd tactic by Movies Galore is just a mere assumption and might not work in the longer run.
Firstly, it must be realized that it is a 'recent' decline in profit margin and has not been sustained for a long period of time. Instead of scrutinizing this observation, the manager of Movies Galore adopted a very different approach by cutting down on their operating expenses. By very different, I mean, the approach is far from being coherent and logical. The recent decline might be due to lack of new videos being produced or maybe the customers haven't even finished the previous videos which they bought! There can be raft reasons as to why there has been a decline in the profit margin, but implementing a holistic change in operating times certainly isn't the best approach to reverse the decline. Customers, who make up the working population, might only come visit these video rental stores after their working hours which is mostly after 6:00 P.M. And to implement this new closing time in the other nine outlets, they might face a severe loss indeed.
Secondly, reducing the stock by eliminating all the movies released more than five years ago is not an appreciable initiative too. As we've heard from many, "Art never dies", it holds very true in case of good art. People would like to revisit good movies every now and then. Also movies which have been released way ahead of their time might receive their well deserved praise by these rental outlets only (as they would've failed at Box Office). 'Back To The Future" movie series is one which is being highly recommended now, even though it released way back in the '90s. Hence, my point was, by removing the stock of old movies, Movies Galore might end up driving away their highly tasteful customers.
Finally, to keep up the reputation of offering great movies at low prices, it begs the question "Was not raising the rental prices the only option and was dismissed as unviable?" They could've very well tried cost cutting by other means like reducing their cost price. They could've changed their wholesale purchaser to a new one who would offer at a lower price. Or they could've just reduced the salary of the workers for the time being till the shop starts to flourish again. Okay this final sentence might be dicey, but let me tell you how that can be made effective. Instill the thought in your workers that customer satisfaction should be the primary goal and the same is a vital key to success too; it is necessary to work hard as a team to help the company grow and reach greater heights. Once the company prospers, it automatically would be reflected in the paychecks of the workers.
Hence I rest my case saying that there are numerous other better ways to increase the profit margin than the ones mentioned above in the argument which is filled with logical fallacies.
Comments
e-rater score report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 4.0 out of 6
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 12 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 3 2
No. of Sentences: 21 15
No. of Words: 536 350
No. of Characters: 2437 1500
No. of Different Words: 285 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.812 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.547 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.309 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 157 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 105 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 66 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 35 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 25.524 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 10.154 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.571 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.273 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.485 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.057 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 113, Rule ID: PERIOD_OF_TIME[1]
Message: Use simply 'period'.
Suggestion: period
...n and has not been sustained for a long period of time. Instead of scrutinizing this observati...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 451, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: haven't
...s being produced or maybe the customers havent even finished the previous videos which...
^^^^^^
Line 3, column 658, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: isn't
...tic change in operating times certainly isnt the best approach to reverse the declin...
^^^^
Line 5, column 135, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: we've
...s not an appreciable initiative too. As weve heard from many, 'Art never dies&a...
^^^^
Line 5, column 266, Rule ID: EVERY_NOW_AND_THEN[1]
Message: Use simply 'now and then'.
Suggestion: now and then
...eople would like to revisit good movies every now and then. Also movies which have been released w...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 286, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Also,
...revisit good movies every now and then. Also movies which have been released way ahe...
^^^^
Line 5, column 425, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: would've
...se by these rental outlets only as they wouldve failed at Box Office. Back To The Futur...
^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 604, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...ay back in the 90s. Hence, my point was, by removing the stock of old movies, Mov...
^^
Line 9, column 1, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Hence,
...ted in the paychecks of the workers. Hence I rest my case saying that there are nu...
^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, finally, first, firstly, hence, if, may, second, secondly, so, still, then, well, as to, i mean
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 28.0 19.6327345309 143% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 16.0 12.9520958084 124% => OK
Conjunction : 13.0 11.1786427146 116% => OK
Relative clauses : 11.0 13.6137724551 81% => OK
Pronoun: 38.0 28.8173652695 132% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 61.0 55.5748502994 110% => OK
Nominalization: 11.0 16.3942115768 67% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2515.0 2260.96107784 111% => OK
No of words: 528.0 441.139720559 120% => OK
Chars per words: 4.76325757576 5.12650576532 93% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.79356345386 4.56307096286 105% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.4600391838 2.78398813304 88% => OK
Unique words: 289.0 204.123752495 142% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.547348484848 0.468620217663 117% => OK
syllable_count: 776.7 705.55239521 110% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.59920159681 94% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 11.0 4.96107784431 222% => Less pronouns wanted as sentence beginning.
Article: 3.0 8.76447105788 34% => OK
Subordination: 2.0 2.70958083832 74% => OK
Conjunction: 4.0 1.67365269461 239% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 4.0 4.22255489022 95% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 19.0 19.7664670659 96% => OK
Sentence length: 27.0 22.8473053892 118% => OK
Sentence length SD: 77.3224353132 57.8364921388 134% => OK
Chars per sentence: 132.368421053 119.503703932 111% => OK
Words per sentence: 27.7894736842 23.324526521 119% => OK
Discourse Markers: 5.57894736842 5.70786347227 98% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 9.0 5.25449101796 171% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 9.0 8.20758483034 110% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 5.0 6.88822355289 73% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 5.0 4.67664670659 107% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.131972834771 0.218282227539 60% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0399409883308 0.0743258471296 54% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.035054588119 0.0701772020484 50% => Sentences are similar to each other.
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0674198992638 0.128457276422 52% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0337083113518 0.0628817314937 54% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 14.9 14.3799401198 104% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 52.53 48.3550499002 109% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 7.1628742515 43% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 12.6 12.197005988 103% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 10.62 12.5979740519 84% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.59 8.32208582834 103% => OK
difficult_words: 121.0 98.500998004 123% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 13.5 12.3882235529 109% => OK
gunning_fog: 12.8 11.1389221557 115% => OK
text_standard: 13.0 11.9071856287 109% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Rates: 83.33 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 5.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.