"Salicylates are members of the same chemical family as aspirin, a medicine used to treat headaches. Although many foods are naturally rich in salicylates, for the past several decades, food-processing companies have also been adding salicylates to foods as preservatives. This rise in the commercial use of salicylates has been found to correlate with a steady decline in the average number of headaches reported by participants in our twenty-year study. Recently, food-processing companies have found that salicylates can also be used as flavor additives for foods. With this new use for salicylates, we can expect a continued steady decline in the number of headaches suffered by the average citizen of Mentia."
Write a response in which you discuss what specific evidence is needed to evaluate the argument and explain how the evidence would weaken or strengthen the argument.
In the given passage, the author contents that the usage of salicylates can be expected to ebb the number of headaches suffered by the average citizen of Manta. The author enumerates several factors to espouse the claim. Salicylates are used to treat headaches, and food processing companies have been adding the chemical a lot as the function of preservatives. This can be supported by twenty-year study. Also, the food-processing companies have started to used salicylates as flavor additives for foods. Despite the argument sounds plausible, copious logical flaws are presented; the writing needs to be revised to become irrefutable.
The first point the author indicates is salicylates are used to be a medicine to heal headaches. The hidden meaning is that the medicine is not used anymore in nowadays, and we can infer many different reasons why it is not no longer available such as too much burden on liver or different severe side effects. In order to convince salicylates are still feasible, the writer needs to elucidate the reason why the retired drug - salicylates - is not used any longer in modern days.
In addition, we need to be wary to not be fooled from the sentence “twenty-year research which proved the correlation between the usage of salicylates and reduced headache reports among participants.” The sentence leads equivocal understanding. Twenty-years research does not guarantee the quality and reliability of the research. It could be done occasionally without meticulous efforts for twenty years. Even more, attributes of participants are not mentioned. From the passage, the readers cannot extrapolate any preconditions that participants had such as the age, health status, gender, or particular foods they eat. By bolstering the research with detailed explanation is going to give more credential.
Lastly, regardless of truth of correlation between salicylates and milder headaches, no pellucid explanation is provided about citizens of Mentia. How the author convince and expect that residents of Mentia is going to suffer less from the headaches because of salicylates? Any information about residents of Mentia is not given. We can assume that Mentia people may suffer from the headaches, and this why the author argues that Mentia people can be healed from consumption of salicylates indirectly. However, characteristics of Mentia people should be explained more in detail; the innate attributes of the people, the average age, differences of the city, type of foods people enjoy to eat chiefly. After the author elucidates the uniqueness of Mentia people, the relationship between less suffrage from headache and salicylates usage can be construed.
To sum up, the argument is based on peccable points which the author made in the passage, and it is not trustworthy. In order to deliver more limpid and appealing statement, the author should expunge all inflammatory points and render petulant evidences why the people of Mentia are expected to have declined number of headaches.
Comments
Essay evaluations by e-grader
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 158, Rule ID: IN_NOWADAYS[1]
Message: nowadays is used without 'in'. Use simply: 'nowadays'.
Suggestion: nowadays
...s that the medicine is not used anymore in nowadays, and we can infer many different reason...
^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 188, Rule ID: NUMEROUS_DIFFERENT[1]
Message: Use simply 'many'.
Suggestion: many
...d anymore in nowadays, and we can infer many different reasons why it is not no longer availab...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 4, column 559, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...conditions that participants had such as the age, health status, gender, or parti...
^^
Line 6, column 681, Rule ID: ADMIT_ENJOY_VB[1]
Message: This verb is used with the gerund form: 'enjoy eating'.
Suggestion: enjoy eating
...ences of the city, type of foods people enjoy to eat chiefly. After the author elucidates th...
^^^^^^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, first, however, if, lastly, may, so, still, as to, in addition, such as, to sum up
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 28.0 19.6327345309 143% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 12.0 12.9520958084 93% => OK
Conjunction : 13.0 11.1786427146 116% => OK
Relative clauses : 8.0 13.6137724551 59% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 15.0 28.8173652695 52% => OK
Preposition: 69.0 55.5748502994 124% => OK
Nominalization: 13.0 16.3942115768 79% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2555.0 2260.96107784 113% => OK
No of words: 474.0 441.139720559 107% => OK
Chars per words: 5.39029535865 5.12650576532 105% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.66599839874 4.56307096286 102% => OK
Word Length SD: 3.05087951145 2.78398813304 110% => OK
Unique words: 236.0 204.123752495 116% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.497890295359 0.468620217663 106% => OK
syllable_count: 821.7 705.55239521 116% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.7 1.59920159681 106% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 4.0 4.96107784431 81% => OK
Article: 13.0 8.76447105788 148% => OK
Subordination: 1.0 2.70958083832 37% => OK
Conjunction: 5.0 1.67365269461 299% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 9.0 4.22255489022 213% => Less preposition wanted as sentence beginnings.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 23.0 19.7664670659 116% => OK
Sentence length: 20.0 22.8473053892 88% => OK
Sentence length SD: 55.6627707303 57.8364921388 96% => OK
Chars per sentence: 111.086956522 119.503703932 93% => OK
Words per sentence: 20.6086956522 23.324526521 88% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.04347826087 5.70786347227 71% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 4.0 5.25449101796 76% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 7.0 8.20758483034 85% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 7.0 6.88822355289 102% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 9.0 4.67664670659 192% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.245226115622 0.218282227539 112% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0780242730891 0.0743258471296 105% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.111852060959 0.0701772020484 159% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.140640254978 0.128457276422 109% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.113804089794 0.0628817314937 181% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 14.3 14.3799401198 99% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 42.72 48.3550499002 88% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.1628742515 123% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 12.3 12.197005988 101% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 13.98 12.5979740519 111% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 9.09 8.32208582834 109% => OK
difficult_words: 134.0 98.500998004 136% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 8.5 12.3882235529 69% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.0 11.1389221557 90% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 11.9071856287 76% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Rates: 66.67 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 4.0 Out of 6
---------------------
Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 158, Rule ID: IN_NOWADAYS[1]
Message: nowadays is used without 'in'. Use simply: 'nowadays'.
Suggestion: nowadays
...s that the medicine is not used anymore in nowadays, and we can infer many different reason...
^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 188, Rule ID: NUMEROUS_DIFFERENT[1]
Message: Use simply 'many'.
Suggestion: many
...d anymore in nowadays, and we can infer many different reasons why it is not no longer availab...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 4, column 559, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...conditions that participants had such as the age, health status, gender, or parti...
^^
Line 6, column 681, Rule ID: ADMIT_ENJOY_VB[1]
Message: This verb is used with the gerund form: 'enjoy eating'.
Suggestion: enjoy eating
...ences of the city, type of foods people enjoy to eat chiefly. After the author elucidates th...
^^^^^^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, first, however, if, lastly, may, so, still, as to, in addition, such as, to sum up
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 28.0 19.6327345309 143% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 12.0 12.9520958084 93% => OK
Conjunction : 13.0 11.1786427146 116% => OK
Relative clauses : 8.0 13.6137724551 59% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 15.0 28.8173652695 52% => OK
Preposition: 69.0 55.5748502994 124% => OK
Nominalization: 13.0 16.3942115768 79% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2555.0 2260.96107784 113% => OK
No of words: 474.0 441.139720559 107% => OK
Chars per words: 5.39029535865 5.12650576532 105% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.66599839874 4.56307096286 102% => OK
Word Length SD: 3.05087951145 2.78398813304 110% => OK
Unique words: 236.0 204.123752495 116% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.497890295359 0.468620217663 106% => OK
syllable_count: 821.7 705.55239521 116% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.7 1.59920159681 106% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 4.0 4.96107784431 81% => OK
Article: 13.0 8.76447105788 148% => OK
Subordination: 1.0 2.70958083832 37% => OK
Conjunction: 5.0 1.67365269461 299% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 9.0 4.22255489022 213% => Less preposition wanted as sentence beginnings.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 23.0 19.7664670659 116% => OK
Sentence length: 20.0 22.8473053892 88% => OK
Sentence length SD: 55.6627707303 57.8364921388 96% => OK
Chars per sentence: 111.086956522 119.503703932 93% => OK
Words per sentence: 20.6086956522 23.324526521 88% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.04347826087 5.70786347227 71% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 4.0 5.25449101796 76% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 7.0 8.20758483034 85% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 7.0 6.88822355289 102% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 9.0 4.67664670659 192% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.245226115622 0.218282227539 112% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0780242730891 0.0743258471296 105% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.111852060959 0.0701772020484 159% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.140640254978 0.128457276422 109% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.113804089794 0.0628817314937 181% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 14.3 14.3799401198 99% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 42.72 48.3550499002 88% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.1628742515 123% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 12.3 12.197005988 101% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 13.98 12.5979740519 111% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 9.09 8.32208582834 109% => OK
difficult_words: 134.0 98.500998004 136% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 8.5 12.3882235529 69% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.0 11.1389221557 90% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 11.9071856287 76% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Rates: 66.67 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 4.0 Out of 6
---------------------
Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.