Of the two leading real estate firms in our town — Adams Realty and Fitch Realty — Adams Realty is clearly superior. Adams has 40 real estate agents; in contrast, Fitch has 25, many of whom work only part-time. Moreover, Adams' revenue last year was twice as high as that of Fitch and included home sales that averaged $168,000, compared to Fitch's $144,000. Homes listed with Adams sell faster as well: ten years ago I listed my home with Fitch, and it took more than four months to sell; last year, when I sold another home, I listed it with Adams, and it took only one month. Thus, if you want to sell your home quickly and at a good price, you should use Adams Realty
The author claims the contrast between two estate firms, Adams and Fitch Realty; in addition, the statement, Adams Realty is better than Fitch Realty, is proven by not only the numbers of agents and the revenue last year, but also the experience of the author. It seems persuasive that the truth is demonstrated by statistics, the author did not make the cogent reason about evidence of the selling speed.
In terms of the selling speed, the author implied that it took more time to sold the house with Fitch than Adams; however, the time of the selling is different. Fitch sold the house ten years ago, yet Adams sold the house last year. Through the phase of ten years, the financial circumstance of the nation might change. For example, if the society encountered economic recession ten years ago, it is reasonable that it took more time to sell the houses because of the increased unemployment and the poor.
The price of the houses, on the other hand, might be the cause of the sales. Between two houses listed with Fitch and Adams Realty respectively, the statement is lack of the details about the selling price. For instance, Adams Realty might give more discounts in order to sell out quickly.
Last but not the least, albeit there are numbers to prove based on the comparison of the home sales, it is lack of the interval. Home sales in Adams is much more than that in Fitch. The statement does not mention about how many months Adams and Fitch reached the goal.
By the way of conclusion, the author spares no efforts to advertise the advantage of Adams Realty in contrast to Fitch Realty, the claim should be strengthened by more evidence about the speed of selling homes and the standard of good price.
Comments
Essay evaluation report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 3.5 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 13 15
No. of Words: 302 350
No. of Characters: 1375 1500
No. of Different Words: 136 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.169 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.553 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.247 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 81 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 52 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 31 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 22 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 23.231 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 10.62 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.538 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.401 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.656 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.13 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, however, if, so, then, for example, for instance, in addition, in contrast, by the way, in contrast to, on the other hand
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 11.0 19.6327345309 56% => More to be verbs wanted.
Auxiliary verbs: 4.0 12.9520958084 31% => OK
Conjunction : 9.0 11.1786427146 81% => OK
Relative clauses : 4.0 13.6137724551 29% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 9.0 28.8173652695 31% => OK
Preposition: 45.0 55.5748502994 81% => OK
Nominalization: 11.0 16.3942115768 67% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1422.0 2260.96107784 63% => OK
No of words: 302.0 441.139720559 68% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.70860927152 5.12650576532 92% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.1687104957 4.56307096286 91% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.34512839933 2.78398813304 84% => OK
Unique words: 143.0 204.123752495 70% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.473509933775 0.468620217663 101% => OK
syllable_count: 426.6 705.55239521 60% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.4 1.59920159681 88% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 3.0 4.96107784431 60% => OK
Article: 11.0 8.76447105788 126% => OK
Subordination: 1.0 2.70958083832 37% => OK
Conjunction: 2.0 1.67365269461 119% => OK
Preposition: 6.0 4.22255489022 142% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 13.0 19.7664670659 66% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 23.0 22.8473053892 101% => OK
Sentence length SD: 63.1778741885 57.8364921388 109% => OK
Chars per sentence: 109.384615385 119.503703932 92% => OK
Words per sentence: 23.2307692308 23.324526521 100% => OK
Discourse Markers: 10.1538461538 5.70786347227 178% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 0.0 5.25449101796 0% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 6.0 8.20758483034 73% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 2.0 6.88822355289 29% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 5.0 4.67664670659 107% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.306195763659 0.218282227539 140% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.115190296134 0.0743258471296 155% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.101958346967 0.0701772020484 145% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.186089495163 0.128457276422 145% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0531581078534 0.0628817314937 85% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 12.4 14.3799401198 86% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 65.05 48.3550499002 135% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 7.1628742515 43% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.9 12.197005988 81% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 10.33 12.5979740519 82% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.07 8.32208582834 97% => OK
difficult_words: 63.0 98.500998004 64% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 17.0 12.3882235529 137% => OK
gunning_fog: 11.2 11.1389221557 101% => OK
text_standard: 10.0 11.9071856287 84% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Rates: 50.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.