Claim: Governments must ensure that their major cities receive the financial support they need in order to thrive.
Reason: It is primarily in cities that a nation's cultural traditions are preserved and generated.
Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the claim and the reason on which that claim is based.
While it is responsibility of government to ensure that the major cities are aided with sufficient financial resources, we cannot say that the nation's cultural traditions are preserved primarily in major cities as we often see people in cities are too busy to follow their cultural traditions. In fact, quite often youth of major cities doesn’t even believe, realise the significance of following cultural traditions because transfer of cultural knowledge and logical reasons behind a particular traditional practice is not properly conveyed from elder generations to younger generations.
Firstly, any nation’s culture is reflected by festivals celebrated in the nation. The various rituals of any festival are practised effectively in villages than in cities. To exemplify, Sankranthi has been celebrated as farmer’s festival in India during January. In villages, the harvest of agricultural fields is collected just before the festival and on festival day, farmers worship their domestic animals for helping them in farming, prepare various traditional food recipes and their families celebrate festival together with joy and happiness. Where as in major cities of India like Hyderabad, Bombay, Chennai and etc. the festival day is often treated as any other holiday. People do prepare traditional food but some of the rituals are not practised. This may be because of change in their life style. Due to technological advancements and developments in cities people cannot preserve their culture as these cultural practices are based on traditional occupations of any nation. In villages we see people doing traditional occupations like farming, weaving, pottery, goldsmith, blacksmith etc. and hence can effectively practise traditional rituals as they can relate to the significant advantages of these rituals pertaining to their life style.
Secondly, the major cities of any country are cosmopolitan: people of various different traditions live together in cities. Due to this the cultural exchange takes place and many new cultures are generated. Cities play important role in evolution of cultural traditions of any country. This process of evolution is also extremely important to make people compatible with their changing lifestyle and to avoid discrimination of various cultural traditions in cities.
Thirdly, the influence of foreign cultures like in terms of clothing, fine arts is seen on cities than on villages due to their less possible interaction with foreign culture. So, to preserve any nation’s cultural traditions, government should aid villages with various schemes. For example in India the traditional weaving and handicraft art is almost extinct. To bring back past traditional glory the government is making various schemes like encouraging the designers to use these fabrics creatively with modern designs to attract people, increasing the reach of these fabrics and handicrafts to people by opening many stalls, making actors as brand ambassadors of these products. But, in order to drive the technological, scientific advancements of any nation, government must ensure that their major cities receive the financial support they need.
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Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 2, column 560, Rule ID: WHERE_AS[1]
Message: Did you mean 'Whereas'?
Suggestion: Whereas
...stival together with joy and happiness. Where as in major cities of India like Hyderabad...
^^^^^^^^
Line 2, column 626, Rule ID: AND_ETC[1]
Message: Use simply 'etc.'.
Suggestion: etc.
...f India like Hyderabad, Bombay, Chennai and etc. the festival day is often treated as an...
^^^^^^^^
Line 2, column 730, Rule ID: SOME_OF_THE[1]
Message: Simply use 'some'.
Suggestion: some
... People do prepare traditional food but some of the rituals are not practised. This may be ...
^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...eive the financial support they need.
^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, first, firstly, hence, if, may, second, secondly, so, third, thirdly, while, for example, in fact
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 19.0 19.5258426966 97% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 8.0 12.4196629213 64% => OK
Conjunction : 12.0 14.8657303371 81% => OK
Relative clauses : 4.0 11.3162921348 35% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 27.0 33.0505617978 82% => OK
Preposition: 81.0 58.6224719101 138% => OK
Nominalization: 10.0 12.9106741573 77% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2718.0 2235.4752809 122% => OK
No of words: 478.0 442.535393258 108% => OK
Chars per words: 5.68619246862 5.05705443957 112% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.67581127817 4.55969084622 103% => OK
Word Length SD: 3.01082295785 2.79657885939 108% => OK
Unique words: 239.0 215.323595506 111% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.5 0.4932671777 101% => OK
syllable_count: 863.1 704.065955056 123% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.8 1.59117977528 113% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 3.0 6.24550561798 48% => OK
Article: 5.0 4.99550561798 100% => OK
Subordination: 1.0 3.10617977528 32% => OK
Conjunction: 1.0 1.77640449438 56% => OK
Preposition: 7.0 4.38483146067 160% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 22.0 20.2370786517 109% => OK
Sentence length: 21.0 23.0359550562 91% => OK
Sentence length SD: 82.9354523482 60.3974514979 137% => OK
Chars per sentence: 123.545454545 118.986275619 104% => OK
Words per sentence: 21.7272727273 23.4991977007 92% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.90909090909 5.21951772744 94% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.97078651685 80% => OK
Language errors: 4.0 7.80617977528 51% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 14.0 10.2758426966 136% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 1.0 5.13820224719 19% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 7.0 4.83258426966 145% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.353995776143 0.243740707755 145% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.105747877183 0.0831039109588 127% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.106192337233 0.0758088955206 140% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.23349406343 0.150359130593 155% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0777809685895 0.0667264976115 117% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 16.2 14.1392134831 115% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 33.24 48.8420337079 68% => OK
smog_index: 11.2 7.92365168539 141% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 13.8 12.1743820225 113% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 15.72 12.1639044944 129% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 9.04 8.38706741573 108% => OK
difficult_words: 132.0 100.480337079 131% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 20.0 11.8971910112 168% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.4 11.2143820225 93% => OK
text_standard: 16.0 11.7820224719 136% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5/6 paragraphs with 3/4 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: reason 4. address both of the views presented for reason 4 (optional)
para 6: conclusion.
Rates: 75.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 4.5 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.