Formal education tends to restrain our minds and spirits rather than set them free.
Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the statement and explain your reasoning for the position you take. In developing and supporting your position, you should consider ways in which the statement might or might not hold true and explain how these considerations shape your position.
We are all thriving towards freedom, whether from being financial burden or spiritual constraints. However, not everyone of us understands the value of education in helping us achieve that goal. I always believe that one could only be success if he/she learns from preceding failure and formal education is the condensation of that pool. In other words, as a reflection of knowledge convergence, academic environment has been built and transformed into a testing ground for us to nurture and discover our true desire. Second of all, formal education has distilled what is considered critical repertoire in the industry so that we have a constructive framework to put our effort against. Thus, formal education is too essential to be omit as a space to be creative and productive.
Though the situation might vary from country to county, during years of formal education, students are usually encouraged to dream and explore various fields in a protected shield provided by the school. It caters the nourishment and freedom for student to grow before they could be mature to fight against any grim circumstances in the real world. Let’s imagine a society with the absence of formal education! Youths would either be pushed to participate in the work force or are forced to pick up skills along the way. This was what happened in the history of human evolution and is still the emerging issue for some underdeveloped nations.
Furthermore, a country’s success relies heavily on the quality of our future leader, whose success is commonly derived from an efficient education framework. Educational institutions act as a third party agents, who actively involve with up-to-date trends and demands from the industry. It helps maintain a balance of a quality workforce supply. Without these external perspectives, students are not likely to be aware or comprehend the standard measurement of skill level to prepare them for a prospective career. We could further examine this point with one example of the Vietnam education. With the growth of tourism industry, it brought along also the rise of hospitality and tourism institution, where students were trained in a professional manner to better serve rise to the occasion.
However, one may argue that a dogmatic education could harm our creativity instead of promoting it. I concede that in certain academic paradigm, where students are restricted into a parochial curriculum and teaching method, it could be harmful. Nevertheless, these scenarios are relatively rare, potentially found in Asian context, where the education framework withhold a different set of value and to serve different goals. In most Asian countries, students are educated with the aim to land on a financially viable job or to simply be employable. Thus, students generally pursue courses according to industry demand instead of fields of interest. It is the reflection of the negative impact of the economy evolution, however, it is not the issue we try to discuss here.
In summary, formal education does not only provide fundamental structure for eligible training but also liberal space for students to nurture their dream and professional desire. Thus, it is an indispensable part of our society.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 5, column 210, Rule ID: A_PLURAL[2]
Message: Don't use indefinite articles with plural words. Did you mean 'agent'?
Suggestion: agent
...ional institutions act as a third party agents, who actively involve with up-to-date t...
^^^^^^
Line 5, column 736, Rule ID: IN_A_X_MANNER[1]
Message: Consider replacing "in a professional manner" with adverb for "professional"; eg, "in a hasty manner" with "hastily".
...nstitution, where students were trained in a professional manner to better serve rise to the occasion. ...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, furthermore, however, if, may, nevertheless, second, so, still, third, thus, in summary, in other words
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 27.0 19.5258426966 138% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 8.0 12.4196629213 64% => OK
Conjunction : 17.0 14.8657303371 114% => OK
Relative clauses : 11.0 11.3162921348 97% => OK
Pronoun: 37.0 33.0505617978 112% => OK
Preposition: 78.0 58.6224719101 133% => OK
Nominalization: 24.0 12.9106741573 186% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2730.0 2235.4752809 122% => OK
No of words: 516.0 442.535393258 117% => OK
Chars per words: 5.29069767442 5.05705443957 105% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.76609204519 4.55969084622 105% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.95188566659 2.79657885939 106% => OK
Unique words: 293.0 215.323595506 136% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.567829457364 0.4932671777 115% => OK
syllable_count: 870.3 704.065955056 124% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.7 1.59117977528 107% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 13.0 6.24550561798 208% => Less pronouns wanted as sentence beginning.
Article: 1.0 4.99550561798 20% => OK
Subordination: 2.0 3.10617977528 64% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 1.77640449438 0% => OK
Preposition: 6.0 4.38483146067 137% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 24.0 20.2370786517 119% => OK
Sentence length: 21.0 23.0359550562 91% => OK
Sentence length SD: 42.6663411446 60.3974514979 71% => OK
Chars per sentence: 113.75 118.986275619 96% => OK
Words per sentence: 21.5 23.4991977007 91% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.75 5.21951772744 91% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 4.97078651685 101% => OK
Language errors: 2.0 7.80617977528 26% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 14.0 10.2758426966 136% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 5.0 5.13820224719 97% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 5.0 4.83258426966 103% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.110065225391 0.243740707755 45% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0306360273956 0.0831039109588 37% => Sentence topic similarity is low.
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0189264174788 0.0758088955206 25% => Sentences are similar to each other.
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0666080994781 0.150359130593 44% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0102864973746 0.0667264976115 15% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 14.2 14.1392134831 100% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 41.7 48.8420337079 85% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.92365168539 111% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 12.7 12.1743820225 104% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 13.4 12.1639044944 110% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 9.51 8.38706741573 113% => OK
difficult_words: 158.0 100.480337079 157% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 11.5 11.8971910112 97% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.4 11.2143820225 93% => OK
text_standard: 13.0 11.7820224719 110% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Rates: 75.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 4.5 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.