Formal education tends to restrain our minds and spirits rather than set them free.
It is said that our minds and spirits are restrained by formal education. I agree with this situation to some extent.
The education system is the most important part of each country. Each country has its systems and rules for managing it. In most countries, students with lower levels of education should study the same books and sources. For example, in my country Iran, they have to read history, math, physics, science and other academic subjects. All of these subjects are very limited and they are only fundamental subjects for higher levels of education. Therefore, it is believed that formal education in elementary and secondary schools tends to restrain students’ minds and spirits as they only have limited knowledge about their surroundings. In fact, their knowledge is restrained to their books.
However, the more educated students become, the more knowledgeable they will be. When they start high school, they learn how to use the Internet. The Internet itself does not allow students to be in a limited scope. In a higher level of education, people have access to the Internet alongside their formal and academic education. These two complement each other. For example, we can see that even for solving one mathematic issue, students can search on the internet and find different solutions for it. They can also contact other students in other parts of the world and share their information. Maybe, before the introduction of the internet, the minds of students were limited to formal education, and they did not have any knowledge but the things that they had learned from their teachers and books. But now, the Internet has removed this limitation, and students can search for different things freely without any limitation. All countries have their formal education which is a part of their education system and students should pass it. But the thing that makes it easy and free for the student is having access to the Internet as they can search beyond what they learn in their formal education. In this way, they can release their minds from the limitations and mental ropes.
To summarize, in my view, formal education only can restrain minds and spirits in a lower level of education. By contrast, at a higher level of education, with the introduction of the internet, this subject is faded.
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, however, if, may, second, so, therefore, for example, in fact, in my view
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 13.0 19.5258426966 67% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 10.0 12.4196629213 81% => OK
Conjunction : 20.0 14.8657303371 135% => OK
Relative clauses : 7.0 11.3162921348 62% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 46.0 33.0505617978 139% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 47.0 58.6224719101 80% => OK
Nominalization: 22.0 12.9106741573 170% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1941.0 2235.4752809 87% => OK
No of words: 385.0 442.535393258 87% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.04155844156 5.05705443957 100% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.4296068528 4.55969084622 97% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.60213335418 2.79657885939 93% => OK
Unique words: 175.0 215.323595506 81% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.454545454545 0.4932671777 92% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 587.7 704.065955056 83% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.59117977528 94% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 11.0 6.24550561798 176% => OK
Article: 6.0 4.99550561798 120% => OK
Subordination: 2.0 3.10617977528 64% => OK
Conjunction: 4.0 1.77640449438 225% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 11.0 4.38483146067 251% => Less preposition wanted as sentence beginnings.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 23.0 20.2370786517 114% => OK
Sentence length: 16.0 23.0359550562 69% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 43.8368689291 60.3974514979 73% => OK
Chars per sentence: 84.3913043478 118.986275619 71% => OK
Words per sentence: 16.7391304348 23.4991977007 71% => OK
Discourse Markers: 3.65217391304 5.21951772744 70% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.97078651685 80% => OK
Language errors: 0.0 7.80617977528 0% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 5.0 10.2758426966 49% => More positive sentences wanted.
Sentences with negative sentiment : 7.0 5.13820224719 136% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 11.0 4.83258426966 228% => Less facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.158301698942 0.243740707755 65% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0611466509512 0.0831039109588 74% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0973600051497 0.0758088955206 128% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.155627213177 0.150359130593 104% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0650859817352 0.0667264976115 98% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 10.7 14.1392134831 76% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 63.7 48.8420337079 130% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.92365168539 111% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 8.4 12.1743820225 69% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.66 12.1639044944 96% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.26 8.38706741573 87% => OK
difficult_words: 69.0 100.480337079 69% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 6.0 11.8971910112 50% => Linsear_write_formula is low.
gunning_fog: 8.4 11.2143820225 75% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 11.7820224719 76% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5/6 paragraphs with 3/4 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: reason 4. address both of the views presented for reason 4 (optional)
para 6: conclusion.
Rates: 50.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.