People's behavior is largely determined by forces not of their own making.
Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the statement and explain your reasoning for the position you take. In developing and supporting your position, you should consider ways in which the statement might or might not hold true and explain how these considerations shape your position.
The term "behavior" is quietly easy to describe. In general, "behavior" means how a person acts or reacts according to the external or internal forces. Thus, there is a statement that these external forces having solely constituted our behavior. Although it is no doubts that these forces play a vital role in making up our conduct, I believe that it is highly unjustified to say that.
On the one hand, human beings are the most intelligent species, have the liberty of choice and we can think, decide and execute things. Our decision and actions are made by our self. However, outside factors such as society, law, peer, family, etc, contribute to human behavior. History shows many flaw people were the product of these influences. For example, those people who live in the 1990s would still remember Linsey Lohan, a kid actress for Disney Production, she was considered as a young talented actress and nominated for best actress in a drama, however when she got fame and fortune, she had been degraded by these things, her career gradually went down and she committed to drug addiction. Nevertheless, there are some external factors such as laws, rules, and regulations in society were adopted because of practical purposes, but it depends on those who whether to abide by rules or not. For instance, in Singapore, there may be a punishment for throwing garbage on the road or smoke in the public places, nonetheless, thanks for these rules this nation has obtained many advantages such as it is one of the most hygiene countries all around the world and attracting more and more visitors.
On the other hand, in the end, it is completely dependent on us to make the decisions as we are our decision-makers. In this case, the sense of individual will come into crucial play. Although the rules, laws and outer forces continuously remind us against doing bad or illegal, there are people who break laws, which is evident by the crime rate, thus, what are the effects of external force on such people? They have decided not to let the external forces determine their behavior. A thief will steal in spite of the laws in society. Many argue that their actions resulted from poverty, circumstances, etc, but it is eventually the thief who makes the decision. As a result, you can only be responsible for your own attitudes and behaviors.
In conclusion, the above statement is not entirely proper. Although we have to face many external forces and I suppose that we are affected by them, human beings take the responsibility of whether letting or not these effects. So, I firmly believe that our action springs from our free will accord with common sense and everyday experience.
Transition Words or Phrases used:
but, however, if, may, nevertheless, nonetheless, so, still, thus, for example, for instance, i suppose, in conclusion, in general, no doubt, such as, as a result, in spite of, on the other hand
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 22.0 19.5258426966 113% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 7.0 12.4196629213 56% => OK
Conjunction : 21.0 14.8657303371 141% => OK
Relative clauses : 13.0 11.3162921348 115% => OK
Pronoun: 50.0 33.0505617978 151% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 49.0 58.6224719101 84% => OK
Nominalization: 7.0 12.9106741573 54% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2248.0 2235.4752809 101% => OK
No of words: 457.0 442.535393258 103% => OK
Chars per words: 4.91903719912 5.05705443957 97% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.62358717085 4.55969084622 101% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.80456369557 2.79657885939 100% => OK
Unique words: 255.0 215.323595506 118% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.557986870897 0.4932671777 113% => OK
syllable_count: 713.7 704.065955056 101% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.59117977528 101% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 10.0 6.24550561798 160% => OK
Article: 5.0 4.99550561798 100% => OK
Subordination: 4.0 3.10617977528 129% => OK
Conjunction: 3.0 1.77640449438 169% => OK
Preposition: 8.0 4.38483146067 182% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 21.0 20.2370786517 104% => OK
Sentence length: 21.0 23.0359550562 91% => OK
Sentence length SD: 80.4745280189 60.3974514979 133% => OK
Chars per sentence: 107.047619048 118.986275619 90% => OK
Words per sentence: 21.7619047619 23.4991977007 93% => OK
Discourse Markers: 9.2380952381 5.21951772744 177% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.97078651685 80% => OK
Language errors: 0.0 7.80617977528 0% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 9.0 10.2758426966 88% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 4.0 5.13820224719 78% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 8.0 4.83258426966 166% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.147454711328 0.243740707755 60% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0414442326001 0.0831039109588 50% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0516532367926 0.0758088955206 68% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0877155100269 0.150359130593 58% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0488425222303 0.0667264976115 73% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 12.6 14.1392134831 89% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 50.16 48.8420337079 103% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.92365168539 111% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.5 12.1743820225 94% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.26 12.1639044944 93% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.48 8.38706741573 101% => OK
difficult_words: 110.0 100.480337079 109% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 8.0 11.8971910112 67% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.4 11.2143820225 93% => OK
text_standard: 12.0 11.7820224719 102% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5/6 paragraphs with 3/4 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: reason 4. address both of the views presented for reason 4 (optional)
para 6: conclusion.
Rates: 54.17 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.25 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.