Do you agree or disagree with the following statement In order to become financially responsible adults children should learn to manage their own money at young age

Essay topics:

Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? In order to become financially responsible adults, children should learn to manage their own money at young age.

It is undeniable that being financially responsible is a challenge for most people, and an essential need at the same time. In my opinion, I believe that to achieve this kind of responsibility as an adults, children should learn to manage their own money at younge age. I strongly think this way for two reasons, which I am going to explain in the following essay.
To begin with, effective learning or education should start step by step, so people will be able to undersand what they learn and apply it efficiently. For instance, when my brother Ammar began teaching his twelve years old son how to control his money, he started when he was six years old, and his first step was to teach him how to count them, and then how to manage them to be enough for his needs. After that, my brother started with the next step, which was to try to save two dollars each months. In response to what ammar did, his son now has his own bank account, and he is planning to invite his family to their nex vacation.
Second, teaching kids is easier than teaching older people, and what they learn at young age will stay longer with them. In fact, adults benefit more from their childhood knowledge than their new experiences. Back to my brother example, his son's ability to manage his money is better than his own ability, eventhough he studied finance at the university. Our parents spoiled us a lot, so they did not teach us how to deal with money, what ever we asked for, they bought it. That is why we did not learn anything about managing our own money or being financcially responsible. In the other hand, my brother wanted to avoid our parents mistake, so he started to teach his son at young age.
To sum up, I agree with the statement that in order for adults to be financially responsible, children should learn to manage their own money at young age not only because kids learn easier, but also starting any learning process with small steps is more efficient than taking the whole information as once at older age. Moreover, I suggest that chiladren should learn the financial vocabularies in addition to money management, so they will not struggle with these difficult words as adults.

Votes
Average: 9.4 (2 votes)
Essay Categories

Comments

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 197, Rule ID: A_PLURAL[1]
Message: Don't use indefinite articles with plural words. Did you mean 'an adult' or simply 'adults'?
Suggestion: an adult; adults
... achieve this kind of responsibility as an adults, children should learn to manage their ...
^^^^^^^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, first, if, moreover, second, so, then, as to, for instance, in addition, in fact, kind of, in my opinion, to begin with, to sum up

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 15.0 15.1003584229 99% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 8.0 9.8082437276 82% => OK
Conjunction : 9.0 13.8261648746 65% => OK
Relative clauses : 10.0 11.0286738351 91% => OK
Pronoun: 59.0 43.0788530466 137% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 50.0 52.1666666667 96% => OK
Nominalization: 8.0 8.0752688172 99% => OK

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1797.0 1977.66487455 91% => OK
No of words: 391.0 407.700716846 96% => OK
Chars per words: 4.59590792839 4.8611393121 95% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.44676510885 4.48103885553 99% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.44070986499 2.67179642975 91% => OK
Unique words: 208.0 212.727598566 98% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.531969309463 0.524837075471 101% => OK
syllable_count: 540.0 618.680645161 87% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.4 1.51630824373 92% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 13.0 9.59856630824 135% => OK
Article: 0.0 3.08781362007 0% => OK
Subordination: 2.0 3.51792114695 57% => OK
Conjunction: 6.0 1.86738351254 321% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 7.0 4.94265232975 142% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 15.0 20.6003584229 73% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 26.0 20.1344086022 129% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively long.
Sentence length SD: 60.8132295548 48.9658058833 124% => OK
Chars per sentence: 119.8 100.406767564 119% => OK
Words per sentence: 26.0666666667 20.6045352989 127% => OK
Discourse Markers: 9.4 5.45110844103 172% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 1.0 5.5376344086 18% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 10.0 11.8709677419 84% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 2.0 3.85842293907 52% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 3.0 4.88709677419 61% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.342163864149 0.236089414692 145% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.126058267064 0.076458572812 165% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.118223332962 0.0737576698707 160% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.250289783273 0.150856017488 166% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.128454306888 0.0645574589148 199% => OK

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 13.3 11.7677419355 113% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 62.01 58.1214874552 107% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 6.10430107527 144% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.1 10.1575268817 109% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 9.7 10.9000537634 89% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.91 8.01818996416 99% => OK
difficult_words: 74.0 86.8835125448 85% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 11.0 10.002688172 110% => OK
gunning_fog: 12.4 10.0537634409 123% => OK
text_standard: 11.0 10.247311828 107% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:

para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.

So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:

reasons == advantages or

reasons == disadvantages

for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.

or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.


Rates: 88.3333333333 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 26.5 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.