Do you agree or disagree with the following statement?
People today spend too much time on personal enjoyment – doing things they like to do – rather than doing things they should do.
Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.
The pace of the modern life is immensely fast and in order to succeed people have to spend a lot of time working and studying. Personally, I think that my contemporaries do not devote a myriad of time to enjoyable activities. I feel this way for two main reasons, which I will explore in the following essay.
First of all, many adults have to financially support their families, and so they spend most of their lives working. If parents just please themselves and do not have a job, they will not be able to provide their children with necessary things such as food and warm place to live. My personal experience is a compelling example of this. My husband and I have twins and in order to raise them properly and pay all our bills, we have to have full-time employment. Moreover, we like to take our kids to entertaining events and help them to form pleasant memories of their childhood. However, visiting such places is expensive and because of this, my spouse works over oftentimes. In this way, we rarely have a chance to meet our friends or play our favorite sports. Although every year we take a trip to a new destination, our vacation time is always limited and we do not rest enough.
Secondly, modern people are busy acquiring education, which is an arduous and long process. These days individuals who want to excel in life have to have a profession that could provide them with a stable income and the respect of society. For instance, I am a foreign pharmacist and in order to start working in my field in the United States, I have to pass numerous tests. Every day after work I study for a few hours. Not only that, but I also practice on weekends. Despite the fact that there are many other occupations are available in this country, I enjoy working in a pharmaceutical sphere and therefore, I endeavor to consistently study to pass my exams. As a result, I do not have an opportunity to devote a lot of time to personal enjoyment and fun activities.
In conclusion, I strongly believe that in contemporary society people are busy and have little time for personal amusement. This is because we have to work hard to support their families and study enthusiastically to acquire a profession.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 4, column 239, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...thusiastically to acquire a profession.
^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, first, however, if, moreover, second, secondly, so, therefore, thus, for instance, i feel, i think, in conclusion, such as, as a result, first of all
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 11.0 15.1003584229 73% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 3.0 9.8082437276 31% => OK
Conjunction : 20.0 13.8261648746 145% => OK
Relative clauses : 8.0 11.0286738351 73% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 52.0 43.0788530466 121% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 53.0 52.1666666667 102% => OK
Nominalization: 8.0 8.0752688172 99% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1818.0 1977.66487455 92% => OK
No of words: 393.0 407.700716846 96% => OK
Chars per words: 4.62595419847 4.8611393121 95% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.45244063426 4.48103885553 99% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.78302180967 2.67179642975 104% => OK
Unique words: 210.0 212.727598566 99% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.534351145038 0.524837075471 102% => OK
syllable_count: 594.0 618.680645161 96% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.51630824373 99% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 18.0 9.59856630824 188% => OK
Article: 1.0 3.08781362007 32% => OK
Subordination: 3.0 3.51792114695 85% => OK
Conjunction: 2.0 1.86738351254 107% => OK
Preposition: 3.0 4.94265232975 61% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 20.0 20.6003584229 97% => OK
Sentence length: 19.0 20.1344086022 94% => OK
Sentence length SD: 36.0114912216 48.9658058833 74% => OK
Chars per sentence: 90.9 100.406767564 91% => OK
Words per sentence: 19.65 20.6045352989 95% => OK
Discourse Markers: 8.0 5.45110844103 147% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 1.0 5.5376344086 18% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 13.0 11.8709677419 110% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 2.0 3.85842293907 52% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 5.0 4.88709677419 102% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.159948708778 0.236089414692 68% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0510794412492 0.076458572812 67% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0621640181526 0.0737576698707 84% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.102441151698 0.150856017488 68% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0381068881014 0.0645574589148 59% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 10.2 11.7677419355 87% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 60.65 58.1214874552 104% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 6.10430107527 144% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.5 10.1575268817 94% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 9.57 10.9000537634 88% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.99 8.01818996416 100% => OK
difficult_words: 85.0 86.8835125448 98% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 11.0 10.002688172 110% => OK
gunning_fog: 9.6 10.0537634409 95% => OK
text_standard: 10.0 10.247311828 98% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 70.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 21.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.