Some parent offer their school-age children money for each high grade (mark) they get in school Do you think this is a good idea?Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.

Essay topics:

Some parent offer their school-age children money for each high grade (mark) they get in school Do you think this is a good idea?

Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.

These days, money plays a significant role in the life of almost every person. Personally, I think that giving children money for advanced school marks can be beneficial for both, parents and their kids. There are a few reasons why I hold this stance.
First of all, a child can increase intellectually. Children like playing with toys, which nowadays are quite expensive, but they depend on parents financially and cannot purchase the toy they want at any time. If children are certain that they will get paid for their academical success, they will strive to study hard, since, in the result, they will be able to buy a desirable thing. My brother`s experience is a compelling example of this. My sibling enjoyed playing video games and he liked to try any new one on the market, but unfortunately, he is could not afford to buy them when they were available in stores. In this way, our parents offered him to purchase the games he wanted the most if he caught up with his grades in chemistry and math, and he agreed. As a result, my brother not only improved in chemistry and math but decided to study them in a college. That is why I feel that paying to a child in a nice idea.
Secondly, parents can save time and money on tutors for a kid if he is up to learn from himself when they pay him. Modern life is extremely busy and people who have families concentrated on making money to support their loved ones. For this reason, their time on helping their children with school work is limited. Moreover, hiring a private teacher for this purpose is pricy. However, a child is interested in obtaining money for excellent grades, he will study by himself without an external help. For instance, before my brother started getting paid for his school improvement, my parents always put a lot of effort into making him study. On the other hand, when he started receiving money, he fulfilled his school assignments right away without any reminder from our parents. Moreover, his aspiration to learn became so high, that he started reading articles and watching videos on the Internet about arduous for his topics. In this way, the was not a need for a tutor anymore to help him with his school work. This example illustrates a benefit for a child to be sponsored for his advanced marks.
To conclude, I believe that giving money to children for their success in school can have positive an outcome for all his family. This is because it can give kids an incentive to learn better and can be easier for parents to educate their children.

Votes
Average: 7 (1 vote)
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Comments

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 2, column 557, Rule ID: IS_SHOULD[1]
Message: Did you mean 'it'?
Suggestion: it
...ne on the market, but unfortunately, he is could not afford to buy them when they ...
^^
Line 4, column 186, Rule ID: AFFORD_VB[1]
Message: This verb is used with the infinitive: 'to better', 'to well'
Suggestion: to better; to well
... it can give kids an incentive to learn better and can be easier for parents to educat...
^^^^^^
Line 4, column 250, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
... for parents to educate their children.
^^^^^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
but, first, however, if, moreover, second, secondly, so, for instance, i feel, i think, as a result, first of all, on the other hand

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 18.0 15.1003584229 119% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 13.0 9.8082437276 133% => OK
Conjunction : 13.0 13.8261648746 94% => OK
Relative clauses : 11.0 11.0286738351 100% => OK
Pronoun: 67.0 43.0788530466 156% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 54.0 52.1666666667 104% => OK
Nominalization: 4.0 8.0752688172 50% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2094.0 1977.66487455 106% => OK
No of words: 451.0 407.700716846 111% => OK
Chars per words: 4.64301552106 4.8611393121 96% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.60833598836 4.48103885553 103% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.50306767014 2.67179642975 94% => OK
Unique words: 233.0 212.727598566 110% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.516629711752 0.524837075471 98% => OK
syllable_count: 650.7 618.680645161 105% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.4 1.51630824373 92% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 19.0 9.59856630824 198% => OK
Article: 3.0 3.08781362007 97% => OK
Subordination: 4.0 3.51792114695 114% => OK
Conjunction: 3.0 1.86738351254 161% => OK
Preposition: 6.0 4.94265232975 121% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 23.0 20.6003584229 112% => OK
Sentence length: 19.0 20.1344086022 94% => OK
Sentence length SD: 38.6178994122 48.9658058833 79% => OK
Chars per sentence: 91.0434782609 100.406767564 91% => OK
Words per sentence: 19.6086956522 20.6045352989 95% => OK
Discourse Markers: 5.73913043478 5.45110844103 105% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 3.0 5.5376344086 54% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 19.0 11.8709677419 160% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 1.0 3.85842293907 26% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 3.0 4.88709677419 61% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.296875797703 0.236089414692 126% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0902345667143 0.076458572812 118% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0672014055233 0.0737576698707 91% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.198238626875 0.150856017488 131% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0431153080672 0.0645574589148 67% => OK

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 10.2 11.7677419355 87% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 69.11 58.1214874552 119% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 6.10430107527 51% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 8.3 10.1575268817 82% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 9.63 10.9000537634 88% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.94 8.01818996416 99% => OK
difficult_words: 96.0 86.8835125448 110% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 8.5 10.002688172 85% => OK
gunning_fog: 9.6 10.0537634409 95% => OK
text_standard: 10.0 10.247311828 98% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:

para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.

So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:

reasons == advantages or

reasons == disadvantages

for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.

or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.


Rates: 70.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 21.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.