Some parents offer their school-age children money for each high grade (mark) they get in school Do you think this is a good idea?
Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.
Using money as reward to encourage students to study hard may seem to be a unreasonable way. Some people strongly believe that money shouldn’t be used as reward of students’ high grade. As for me, I think it is indeed an effective way to encourage students to get better grade.
Firstly, it is obviously clear that setting a prize will be a huge stimulation for students to do their best and achieve specific goals. If young children want to take the prize, they will do their best in class, resulting in not only improvement in their of knowledge but also getting more involved in school activities which makes their lives more enjoyable. For example, when I was in primary school, my mother told me that I will be rewarded if I can get the top grade student in my class. Of course, I put effort in studying. Finally, with my great effort, I finally reached my goals, in the mean time, I found studying was not that boring since I got my reward.
Secondly, it is very important for parents to teach their children about concept of money. children would learn that it is not easy to make money, and the only way they get money is to do their best in class. For instance,since most of students in primary school spend their time in playing games before class, but now they have to compete with each others and pay extreme efforts to get rewards. Therefor, they will learn the the concept of competition and those successful students who learn to surmount obstacles will receive a valuable outcome, both in mental and money.
In conclusion, offer money to students for high grade have unquestioning benefits. Students will not only be encouraged to do their best but also they learn the importance and toughness of making money.
Grammar and spelling errors:
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Message: Use 'an' instead of 'a' if the following word starts with a vowel sound, e.g. 'an article', 'an hour'
Suggestion: an
...e students to study hard may seem to be a unreasonable way. Some people strongly ...
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Line 3, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...ourage students to get better grade. Firstly, it is obviously clear that sett...
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Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...t that boring since I got my reward. Secondly, it is very important for paren...
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Line 5, column 94, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Children
... their children about concept of money. children would learn that it is not easy to make...
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Line 5, column 224, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma
Suggestion: , since
... to do their best in class. For instance,since most of students in primary school spen...
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Line 5, column 231, Rule ID: MOST_SOME_OF_NNS[1]
Message: After 'most of', you should use 'the' ('most of the students') or simply say ''most students''.
Suggestion: most of the students; most students
...their best in class. For instance,since most of students in primary school spend their time in p...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 426, Rule ID: ENGLISH_WORD_REPEAT_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a word
Suggestion: the
... get rewards. Therefor, they will learn the the concept of competition and those succes...
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Line 5, column 426, Rule ID: DT_DT[1]
Message: Maybe you need to remove one determiner so that only 'the' or 'the' is left.
Suggestion: the; the
... get rewards. Therefor, they will learn the the concept of competition and those succes...
^^^^^^^
Line 7, column 205, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...portance and toughness of making money.
^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, finally, first, firstly, if, may, second, secondly, so, as for, for example, for instance, i think, in conclusion, of course
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 12.0 15.1003584229 79% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 9.0 9.8082437276 92% => OK
Conjunction : 9.0 13.8261648746 65% => OK
Relative clauses : 8.0 11.0286738351 73% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 38.0 43.0788530466 88% => OK
Preposition: 41.0 52.1666666667 79% => OK
Nominalization: 5.0 8.0752688172 62% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1442.0 1977.66487455 73% => OK
No of words: 306.0 407.700716846 75% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.71241830065 4.8611393121 97% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.18244613648 4.48103885553 93% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.62466929134 2.67179642975 98% => OK
Unique words: 162.0 212.727598566 76% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.529411764706 0.524837075471 101% => OK
syllable_count: 434.7 618.680645161 70% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.4 1.51630824373 92% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 9.0 9.59856630824 94% => OK
Article: 0.0 3.08781362007 0% => OK
Subordination: 4.0 3.51792114695 114% => OK
Conjunction: 2.0 1.86738351254 107% => OK
Preposition: 5.0 4.94265232975 101% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 14.0 20.6003584229 68% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 21.0 20.1344086022 104% => OK
Sentence length SD: 46.4817278122 48.9658058833 95% => OK
Chars per sentence: 103.0 100.406767564 103% => OK
Words per sentence: 21.8571428571 20.6045352989 106% => OK
Discourse Markers: 9.64285714286 5.45110844103 177% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 9.0 5.5376344086 163% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 13.0 11.8709677419 110% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 0.0 3.85842293907 0% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 1.0 4.88709677419 20% => More facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.275169620975 0.236089414692 117% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.105831511348 0.076458572812 138% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0594904664241 0.0737576698707 81% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.177450516279 0.150856017488 118% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0295104401897 0.0645574589148 46% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 11.7 11.7677419355 99% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 67.08 58.1214874552 115% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 6.10430107527 51% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.1 10.1575268817 90% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 10.04 10.9000537634 92% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.67 8.01818996416 96% => OK
difficult_words: 58.0 86.8835125448 67% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 11.0 10.002688172 110% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.4 10.0537634409 103% => OK
text_standard: 11.0 10.247311828 107% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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We are expecting: No. of Words: 350 while No. of Different Words: 200
Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 70.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 21.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.