TPO 34- Do you agree or disagree with the following statement?
Educating children is a more difficult task today than it was in the past because they spend so much time on cell phone, online games, and social networking Website.
Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.
In this generation, technology are so advanced and many gadgets and tools are used to entertain people. People spends majority of their time surfing the internet, playing games on their cellphone and they forgot that there are more important things to do with their time. In my humble opinion, I agree that its is difficult educating kids today because there are many distractions with their studies. I feel this way for two main reasons, which I will explore in the following essay.
First of all, young adolescent time are allocated with other activities such as playing online games and surfing the internet. Their time are not spend wisely because they have many external stimuli that capture their attention. Nowadays, parents are experiencing hard time educating their children it is because their attention are focused on playing video games than studying their lessons. However, in the past children study for hours without the distraction from today's technology, so they can focus much better in their subjects. For example, I am reviewing for my Toefl examination and I am having hard time concentrating because there are many social media that ruining my focus to study well. In addition, when I practice for listening and reading section for my toefl exam, my computer will alert for messages and updates from my social media account and it distract me too much that I can't answer the questions properly.
Secondly, educating children are difficult task to parents nowadays. Kids are addicted to their cellphone and mobile app that all they want to do is use their phone and search the internet. Young people do not realize how much time they consume using their cellphone and laptop. The reality is, half of their time are spend with this technology and parents cannot control their children. As a result, their study habits are declining. For instance, my niece Sam like her social media account so much that she uses it everyday. When she wakes up she checks her cellphone for notification from her facebook account and she did not notice that her time is spend on non- useful activities. Sam rarely opens her books and do her assignment, even though her mother helps her and encourages her to study well. Sam's mind are fixated with her social media account and does not want to study.
To summarize, I believe that parents are having hard time educating their children compared in the past. This is because advancement in the technology distracts children to focus more on their studies and their time are allocated on social media accounts.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 147, Rule ID: BEEN_PART_AGREEMENT[2]
Message: Consider using a past participle here: 'spent'.
Suggestion: spent
...urfing the internet. Their time are not spend wisely because they have many external ...
^^^^^
Line 3, column 869, Rule ID: IT_VBZ[1]
Message: Did you mean 'distracts'?
Suggestion: distracts
...tes from my social media account and it distract me too much that I cant answer the ques...
^^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 897, Rule ID: CANT[1]
Message: Did you mean 'can't' or 'cannot'?
Suggestion: can't; cannot
...ount and it distract me too much that I cant answer the questions properly. Secon...
^^^^
Line 5, column 319, Rule ID: BEEN_PART_AGREEMENT[1]
Message: Consider using a past participle here: 'spent'.
Suggestion: spent
... The reality is, half of their time are spend with this technology and parents cannot...
^^^^^
Line 5, column 518, Rule ID: EVERYDAY_EVERY_DAY[3]
Message: 'Everyday' is an adjective. Did you mean 'every day'?
Suggestion: every day
... media account so much that she uses it everyday. When she wakes up she checks her cellp...
^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 654, Rule ID: BEEN_PART_AGREEMENT[1]
Message: Consider using a past participle here: 'spent'.
Suggestion: spent
...and she did not notice that her time is spend on non- useful activities. Sam rarely o...
^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
first, however, if, second, secondly, so, well, for example, for instance, i feel, in addition, such as, as a result, first of all
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 22.0 15.1003584229 146% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 4.0 9.8082437276 41% => OK
Conjunction : 17.0 13.8261648746 123% => OK
Relative clauses : 12.0 11.0286738351 109% => OK
Pronoun: 71.0 43.0788530466 165% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 39.0 52.1666666667 75% => OK
Nominalization: 11.0 8.0752688172 136% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2138.0 1977.66487455 108% => OK
No of words: 429.0 407.700716846 105% => OK
Chars per words: 4.98368298368 4.8611393121 103% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.55107846309 4.48103885553 102% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.47700779532 2.67179642975 93% => OK
Unique words: 204.0 212.727598566 96% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.475524475524 0.524837075471 91% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 664.2 618.680645161 107% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.51630824373 99% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 9.0 9.59856630824 94% => OK
Article: 1.0 3.08781362007 32% => OK
Subordination: 4.0 3.51792114695 114% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 1.86738351254 0% => OK
Preposition: 5.0 4.94265232975 101% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 21.0 20.6003584229 102% => OK
Sentence length: 20.0 20.1344086022 99% => OK
Sentence length SD: 40.8939782892 48.9658058833 84% => OK
Chars per sentence: 101.80952381 100.406767564 101% => OK
Words per sentence: 20.4285714286 20.6045352989 99% => OK
Discourse Markers: 6.19047619048 5.45110844103 114% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 6.0 5.5376344086 108% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 9.0 11.8709677419 76% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 7.0 3.85842293907 181% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 5.0 4.88709677419 102% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.204325595433 0.236089414692 87% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0778009481378 0.076458572812 102% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0459395017143 0.0737576698707 62% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.147305747787 0.150856017488 98% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0158507724467 0.0645574589148 25% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 12.2 11.7677419355 104% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 59.64 58.1214874552 103% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 6.10430107527 144% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.9 10.1575268817 97% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.6 10.9000537634 106% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.13 8.01818996416 101% => OK
difficult_words: 95.0 86.8835125448 109% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 11.5 10.002688172 115% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.0 10.0537634409 99% => OK
text_standard: 12.0 10.247311828 117% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 71.6666666667 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 21.5 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.