TPO47
Nowadays, thanks to the improvement of technology, we can learn the news and events all over the world by surfing the Internet or turning on TVs. However, some people care about the international issues, and some think it is more important to pay attention to things which are close to our lives. In my view, I prefer the former one. I will point out two reasons to support my opinion.
First of all, learning things from different countries and cultures can broaden our views. If we only contact with attitudes and life philosophy from a specific environment, our thoughts and mindsets would be limited by them. On the contrary, receiving diverse ideas, people can make more choices. For example, when I was a child, I decided my career path to be a doctor. However, according to the news, there is seventy percent of children making the same goal in my country. The reason why the phenomenon occurs is that adults in my country actively encourage kids to be a doctor since they believe doctors would be seen as a successful career and gain the most respects in the society. Fortunately, a few years later, I watched an American documentary which introduced how numerous computer science can change the world. After this, I got inspired by the film and set my dream job as a computer engineer. If I had no opportunity to learn about the information from other countries, my road would be narrow since my surroundings would easily influence me.
Moreover, we can see successful works around the world as references to improve ourselves. If people learn the examples which contribute excellent achievement, they can follow the same paths. To make professor Ke, who is the mayor of the capital in my country, as an example, he has visited several cities around the world to learn how to organize and manage municipal affairs. After studying these cases, he successfully applied the bicycle services and systems from Japan into our capital. Therefore, our capital city becomes a place where citizens can ride bicycles safely, cheaply and conveniently. This example demonstrates how international events can benefit people.
In conclusion, based on the points mentioned above, I agree that events happening around the world are worthy to know. Because learning the different views from other cultures can broaden our mindsets. Besides, we can follow excellent cases around the world to make achievements in our lives.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 2, column 836, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...cience can change the world. After this, I got inspired by the film and set my dr...
^^
Line 4, column 120, Rule ID: SENTENCE_FRAGMENT[1]
Message: “Because” at the beginning of a sentence requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
...ng around the world are worthy to know. Because learning the different views from other...
^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
besides, but, first, however, if, may, moreover, so, therefore, for example, in conclusion, first of all, in my view, on the contrary
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 12.0 15.1003584229 79% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 15.0 9.8082437276 153% => OK
Conjunction : 11.0 13.8261648746 80% => OK
Relative clauses : 8.0 11.0286738351 73% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 41.0 43.0788530466 95% => OK
Preposition: 52.0 52.1666666667 100% => OK
Nominalization: 7.0 8.0752688172 87% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2014.0 1977.66487455 102% => OK
No of words: 403.0 407.700716846 99% => OK
Chars per words: 4.99751861042 4.8611393121 103% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.48049772903 4.48103885553 100% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.74331056994 2.67179642975 103% => OK
Unique words: 235.0 212.727598566 110% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.583126550868 0.524837075471 111% => OK
syllable_count: 631.8 618.680645161 102% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.51630824373 106% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 16.0 9.59856630824 167% => OK
Article: 2.0 3.08781362007 65% => OK
Subordination: 8.0 3.51792114695 227% => Less adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 1.0 1.86738351254 54% => OK
Preposition: 7.0 4.94265232975 142% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 21.0 20.6003584229 102% => OK
Sentence length: 19.0 20.1344086022 94% => OK
Sentence length SD: 57.3620794887 48.9658058833 117% => OK
Chars per sentence: 95.9047619048 100.406767564 96% => OK
Words per sentence: 19.1904761905 20.6045352989 93% => OK
Discourse Markers: 6.33333333333 5.45110844103 116% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 2.0 5.5376344086 36% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 12.0 11.8709677419 101% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 1.0 3.85842293907 26% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 8.0 4.88709677419 164% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.0 0.236089414692 0% => The similarity between the topic and the content is low.
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0 0.076458572812 0% => Sentence topic similarity is low.
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0 0.0737576698707 0% => Sentences are similar to each other.
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0 0.150856017488 0% => Maybe some paragraphs are off the topic.
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0 0.0645574589148 0% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 11.7 11.7677419355 99% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 52.19 58.1214874552 90% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 6.10430107527 144% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 10.7 10.1575268817 105% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.72 10.9000537634 108% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.85 8.01818996416 110% => OK
difficult_words: 109.0 86.8835125448 125% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 11.0 10.002688172 110% => OK
gunning_fog: 9.6 10.0537634409 95% => OK
text_standard: 12.0 10.247311828 117% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
It is not exactly right on the topic in the view of e-grader. Maybe there is a wrong essay topic.
Rates: 3.33333333333 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 1.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.