The following recommendation appeared in a memo from the mayor of the town of Hopewell."
Two years ago, the nearby town of Ocean View built a new municipal golf course and resort hotel. During the past two years, tourism in Ocean View has increased, new businesses have opened there, and Ocean View's tax revenues have risen by 30 percent. Therefore, the best way to improve Hopewell's economy—and generate additional tax revenues—is to build a golf course and resort hotel similar to those in Ocean View."
In the argument, the author concludes that the best way to improve Hopeswell’s economy and to gain more tax revenues is to build a golf course and resort hotel like what the town of Ocean View did. To support the argument, the author mentions that tourism in Ocean View has flourished and tax revenue in Ocean View has raised because of the establishment of the golf course and resort hotel. However, it is still replete with a myriad of assumptions which could not suffice to back the argument.
First, the author unfairly claims that the construction of golf course and resort hotel should be the major contributor to the rising tax revenue of Ocean View. Here, the author assumes that no other causes can equally account for the booming Ocean View’s tourism industry. However, chances are that Ocean View has successfully improved air quality by developing electric vehicles, implementing strict policies on carbon emission and putting carbon pricing into effect in the last two years, and thus attracted more tourists to visit the town and gained more tax revenue thanks to the consumption by those tourists. Also, it is likely that many new firms including firms working on artificial intelligence and algorithm being established in Ocean View in the past two years, and gained a large quantity of business income and helped the tax income increase in Ocean View. Therefore, the author needs additional evidence to address the question as to whether other changes can have an impact on the increasing tax revenue of Ocean View. Otherwise, it is not convincing enough to conclude that the establishment of golf course and resort hotel is the main reason of the flourishing economy of Ocean View.
The author goes further by suggesting that Ocean View’s overall economy can be prospered by constructing golf course and resort hotel. However, the unstated assumption is that the prosperous tourism can improve the total output in Ocean View. But not only tourism but also other industries including secondary industry and primary industry like farming and fishing consist of the economy of a town. It is possible that in order to build the golf course, many other companies like lucrative chemical plant have to shutdown and fertile farmland cannot be utilized to grow crops, and thus the overall domestic output of the town may drop significantly. The increasing tax revenue may come from higher consumption tax and income tax in the town. In conclusion, to back the assumption, the author should provide more information about whether the overall economy can be improved or not after building the golf course and resort hotel.
Granted that building golf course and resort hotel in Ocean View did prosper the town’s economy, the author cannot propose that the town of Hopewell could refer to the establishment of golf course and resort hotel in Ocean View to improve the economy and increase tax revenue. The author does not consider that great differences may exist between those two towns and such differences would weaken the analogy of the two. For example, Hopewell may be an industrial town full of machinery factories and coal mines with poor air quality, and thus can hardly attract tourists to visit. Therefore, despite golf court and resort hotels are being built, few people want to travel to Hopewell and the tax revenue cannot be increased. Furthermore, unlike Ocean View where many natural landscapes like beautiful ocean can be viewed by travelers, Hopewell may be a town with poor natural attractions and has difficulty in attracting travelers. Constructing golf court and resort hotel, therefore, can only waste money but will not create service income. All in all, the author has to provide more information to address the possible differences between the two towns. Otherwise, the author cannot simply propose that Hopewell should also build golf court and resort hotel to prosper the economy.
In a nutshell, the argument is unwarranted because the article relies on several unstated assumptions. Therefore, if the argument had included the given factors discussed above, it would have been more logically acceptable.
Comments
Essay evaluation report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 4.0 out of 6
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 25 15
No. of Words: 677 350
No. of Characters: 3405 1500
No. of Different Words: 269 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 5.101 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.03 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.531 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 261 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 186 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 113 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 67 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 27.08 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 10.194 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.68 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.357 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.52 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.093 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 5, column 937, Rule ID: WHETHER[2]
Message: Wordiness: Shorten this phrase to the shortest possible suggestion.
Suggestion: whether; the question whether
...or needs additional evidence to address the question as to whether other changes can have an impact on the...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 9, column 370, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...rimary industry like farming and fishing consist of the economy of a town. It is ...
^^
Line 9, column 517, Rule ID: GOT_SHUTDOWN[1]
Message: Did you mean 'to shut down'?
Suggestion: to shut down
...nies like lucrative chemical plant have to shutdown and fertile farmland cannot be utilized...
^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 13, column 102, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...iew did prosper the town's economy, the author cannot propose that the town ...
^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, first, furthermore, however, if, may, second, so, still, therefore, thus, well, as to, for example, in conclusion
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 21.0 19.6327345309 107% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 25.0 12.9520958084 193% => OK
Conjunction : 34.0 11.1786427146 304% => Less conjunction wanted
Relative clauses : 16.0 13.6137724551 118% => OK
Pronoun: 21.0 28.8173652695 73% => OK
Preposition: 82.0 55.5748502994 148% => OK
Nominalization: 18.0 16.3942115768 110% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 3505.0 2260.96107784 155% => OK
No of words: 677.0 441.139720559 153% => Less content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.17725258493 5.12650576532 101% => OK
Fourth root words length: 5.10090420048 4.56307096286 112% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.65115760271 2.78398813304 95% => OK
Unique words: 281.0 204.123752495 138% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.415066469719 0.468620217663 89% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 1089.9 705.55239521 154% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.59920159681 100% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 5.0 4.96107784431 101% => OK
Article: 14.0 8.76447105788 160% => OK
Subordination: 1.0 2.70958083832 37% => OK
Conjunction: 5.0 1.67365269461 299% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 6.0 4.22255489022 142% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 25.0 19.7664670659 126% => OK
Sentence length: 27.0 22.8473053892 118% => OK
Sentence length SD: 61.5090757531 57.8364921388 106% => OK
Chars per sentence: 140.2 119.503703932 117% => OK
Words per sentence: 27.08 23.324526521 116% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.96 5.70786347227 87% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 4.0 5.25449101796 76% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 11.0 8.20758483034 134% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 8.0 6.88822355289 116% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 6.0 4.67664670659 128% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.347764856805 0.218282227539 159% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.115150183309 0.0743258471296 155% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0838079676215 0.0701772020484 119% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.206834927337 0.128457276422 161% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.111012005147 0.0628817314937 177% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 16.5 14.3799401198 115% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 44.07 48.3550499002 91% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.1628742515 123% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 13.8 12.197005988 113% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 13.06 12.5979740519 104% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.43 8.32208582834 101% => OK
difficult_words: 148.0 98.500998004 150% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 13.5 12.3882235529 109% => OK
gunning_fog: 12.8 11.1389221557 115% => OK
text_standard: 14.0 11.9071856287 118% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Write the essay in 30 minutes.
Rates: 66.67 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 4.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.