The Commercial airline industry in the country of Freedonia has experienced impressive growth in the past three years. This trend will surely continue in the years to come, since the airline industry will benefit from recent changes in Freedonian society: Income are rising, most employees now receive more vacation time, and interest in travel is rising, as shown by an increase in media attention devoted to foreign culture and tourist attractions
The argument that the Freedonian commercial airline industry might continue flourishing due to recent societal changes is quite compelling, and might even look logical at first glance. However, the author heavily relies on unsupported assumptions to make a leap from a few observations to a conclusion without adequate proof to back his claims. Therefore, the argument is fundamentally flawed, and unpersuasive.
First, the author makes the mistake of leaping into the conclusion that the Freedonian airline industry might keep blooming due to increased income and increased vacation time. However, he fails to take into account the mere fact that a rise of living expenses of the country was the reason for the rise of income in the first place. If so, people would be rather reluctant to spend their money on travelling, especially costly means of travel such as air travel. It is reasonable to expect an increase in vacation time to be followed by increased leisurely travel. Once more, if the living expenses are high, people may opt to take cheaper forms of travel such as trains or buses. People might altogether postpone their plans for international jaunts and instead take pleasure in retiring to the country side. Therefore, increase in income and vacation time set no premise for the Freedonian airline industry to keep flourishing. Had the author provided proof, perhaps in the form of past situtations where the Freedonian society opted for air travel during times of better income and longer vacation periods, the argument would have been more cogent and convincing.
Secondly, the author attributes the change in media attention towards foreign cultures and tourist attractions as a signal that implies a newfound interest in the society for foreign travel. If the author had based this claim on actual information as published in a newspaper article or electronic media, this claim would have been a very powerful indicator of a fortune for the airline industry. However, without such support for his claim, it is imprudent to leap from a simple observation to such a heavy conclusion.
If the people of Freeedonia were somehow motivated for and could afford air travel, still, there would be an indirect blow on the 'Freedonian' airline industry, if the people opt to travel in cheaper foreign airlines. Therefore, although the airline industry would benefit as a whole, the Freedonian airlines in particular wouldn't see much benefit.
In conclusion, the assertion that the Freedonian airline industry might keep burgeoning would have been bolstered, had the author provided sufficient evidence to support his claims. Without adequate proof, the audience to this argument must be skeptical in acting upon it. While it would be too extreme to call the argument as untrue, it is definetely safe to consider it a mere conjecture; a conclusion based on limited evidence. After all, the assertion of the author might in fact be true, however, due to latent correlations that the author fails to capture in his argument.
Comments
Essay evaluation report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 4.0 out of 6
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 20 15
No. of Words: 491 350
No. of Characters: 2486 1500
No. of Different Words: 228 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.707 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.063 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.696 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 201 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 149 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 103 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 58 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 24.55 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 7.263 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.8 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.322 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.534 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.066 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 13, column 73, Rule ID: AFFORD_VB[1]
Message: This verb is used with the infinitive: 'to air'
Suggestion: to air
... somehow motivated for and could afford air travel, still, there would be an indire...
^^^
Line 13, column 322, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: wouldn't
..., the Freedonian airlines in particular wouldnt see much benefit. In conclusion, t...
^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
but, first, however, if, look, may, second, secondly, so, still, therefore, while, after all, in conclusion, in fact, in particular, such as, in the first place
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 17.0 19.6327345309 87% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 16.0 12.9520958084 124% => OK
Conjunction : 11.0 11.1786427146 98% => OK
Relative clauses : 7.0 13.6137724551 51% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 22.0 28.8173652695 76% => OK
Preposition: 64.0 55.5748502994 115% => OK
Nominalization: 18.0 16.3942115768 110% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2560.0 2260.96107784 113% => OK
No of words: 490.0 441.139720559 111% => OK
Chars per words: 5.22448979592 5.12650576532 102% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.70488508055 4.56307096286 103% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.77117308191 2.78398813304 100% => OK
Unique words: 236.0 204.123752495 116% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.481632653061 0.468620217663 103% => OK
syllable_count: 800.1 705.55239521 113% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.59920159681 100% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 5.0 4.96107784431 101% => OK
Article: 11.0 8.76447105788 126% => OK
Subordination: 8.0 2.70958083832 295% => Less adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 2.0 1.67365269461 119% => OK
Preposition: 4.0 4.22255489022 95% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 20.0 19.7664670659 101% => OK
Sentence length: 24.0 22.8473053892 105% => OK
Sentence length SD: 42.7575724288 57.8364921388 74% => OK
Chars per sentence: 128.0 119.503703932 107% => OK
Words per sentence: 24.5 23.324526521 105% => OK
Discourse Markers: 8.0 5.70786347227 140% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 2.0 5.25449101796 38% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 10.0 8.20758483034 122% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 9.0 6.88822355289 131% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 1.0 4.67664670659 21% => More facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.157031573231 0.218282227539 72% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0530410577639 0.0743258471296 71% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0665981534417 0.0701772020484 95% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.102958187196 0.128457276422 80% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0444998935733 0.0628817314937 71% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 15.4 14.3799401198 107% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 47.12 48.3550499002 97% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 7.1628742515 43% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 12.7 12.197005988 104% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 13.29 12.5979740519 105% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.63 8.32208582834 104% => OK
difficult_words: 118.0 98.500998004 120% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 11.0 12.3882235529 89% => OK
gunning_fog: 11.6 11.1389221557 104% => OK
text_standard: 13.0 11.9071856287 109% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Rates: 66.67 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 4.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.