A recent study indicates that children living in the Himalayan mountain region in Nepal have lower levels of tooth decay than children living in suburban areas in the United States despite the fact that people in the Himalayan mountain region in Nepal rec

Essay topics:

A recent study indicates that children living in the Himalayan mountain region in Nepal have lower levels of tooth decay than children living in suburban areas in the United States, despite the fact that people in the Himalayan mountain region in Nepal receive little to no professional dental care, while people in suburban areas in the United States see a dentist an average of 1.25 times per year. Thus, regular dental care is not helpful in preventing tooth decay

It might seem logical, at first glance, to agree with the argument that regular dental care is not helpful in preventing tooth decay.However, in order to fully evaluate this argument, we need to have a significant amount of additional evidence.The argument could end up being much weaker than it seems, or it might actually be quite valid.In order to make that determination, we need to know more then analyze what we learn.

Firstly, we can't compare two groups of people living at different geographical locations,people of Nepal are staying in the Himalayan mountain region have limited access to dental health care when compared to people of US staying in the suburban areas.For example,Nepalese might be following some regular tooth care instead of relying on any dentists.Therefore, Nepalese don't need any regular dental care whereas people of US might be not following good oral hygiene and because of this they need regular health care.In that case, the argument claims is seriously weakened.

Another important factor that affect the dental health care is genetics which is completely ignored in the above excerpt.Genetics doesn't just apply to immediate family but in fact to the larger community.We could conduct genetics test and find if genetics play a role here and may be because of that Nepalese have good dental health.Conversely, people of US might be having a bad dental health due to bad genetics and this concludes that this has nothing to do with how many times they visit a doctor.

The data is faulty has there is no information about adult's dental health care of both the groups.For example, adults in US might have reduced the tooth decay problems after regular visits to dentists in the early age whereas Nepalese might be developed some tooth decay problems later in their life.We can't extrapolate the things from children to adults.Thus, we need evidence about the dental health of adults to make proper conclusion.

Finally, data is not sufficient as we don't the full extent of research.While we may be accurate data from US we can perhaps not make the same claim about Nepal.For example,Nepalese might be having some informal dental health in the Himalayas.So, these things they might have not taken into account while doing the survey.Thus, without knowing the proper information about survey done in both the places we can't assure that regular health checkups is not preventing the tooth decay.

Clearly,then we need to have additional evidence in order to get a more complete understanding of the strengths and weaknesses of argument.We need to know about the extent of survey, genetics test, adult’s dental health and the oral hygiene of two groups of people.And we really need more information if we want to extend the results that regular dental care is not helpful in preventing tooth decay.

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Average: 5.8 (2 votes)
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Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 134, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
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Suggestion: However
...s not helpful in preventing tooth decay.However, in order to fully evaluate this argume...
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...gnificant amount of additional evidence.The argument could end up being much weaker...
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Suggestion: In
...ms, or it might actually be quite valid.In order to make that determination, we ne...
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Message: Comparison requires 'than', not 'then' nor 'as'.
Suggestion: than
...hat determination, we need to know more then analyze what we learn. Firstly, we c...
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Line 3, column 13, Rule ID: CANT[1]
Message: Did you mean 'can't' or 'cannot'?
Suggestion: can't; cannot
...n analyze what we learn. Firstly, we cant compare two groups of people living at ...
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...ving at different geographical locations,people of Nepal are staying in the Himalayan m...
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...ple of US staying in the suburban areas.For example,Nepalese might be following som...
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Suggestion: , Nepalese
...taying in the suburban areas.For example,Nepalese might be following some regular tooth c...
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Suggestion: Therefore
...care instead of relying on any dentists.Therefore, Nepalese dont need any regular dental ...
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Suggestion: don't
...ing on any dentists.Therefore, Nepalese dont need any regular dental care whereas pe...
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...e of this they need regular health care.In that case, the argument claims is serio...
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Suggestion: Genetics
...completely ignored in the above excerpt.Genetics doesnt just apply to immediate family b...
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Suggestion: doesn't
...y ignored in the above excerpt.Genetics doesnt just apply to immediate family but in f...
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...ily but in fact to the larger community.We could conduct genetics test and find if...
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...f that Nepalese have good dental health.Conversely, people of US might be having a bad den...
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...s dental health care of both the groups.For example, adults in US might have reduce...
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Suggestion: We
...ooth decay problems later in their life.We cant extrapolate the things from childr...
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Message: Did you mean 'can't' or 'cannot'?
Suggestion: can't; cannot
...h decay problems later in their life.We cant extrapolate the things from children to...
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Suggestion: Thus
...late the things from children to adults.Thus, we need evidence about the dental heal...
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... Finally, data is not sufficient as we dont the full extent of research.While we ma...
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... as we dont the full extent of research.While we may be accurate data from US we can ...
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Message: “While” at the beginning of a sentence requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
... as we dont the full extent of research.While we may be accurate data from US we can ...
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...aps not make the same claim about Nepal.For example,Nepalese might be having some i...
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Suggestion: , Nepalese
...e the same claim about Nepal.For example,Nepalese might be having some informal dental he...
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...informal dental health in the Himalayas.So, these things they might have not taken...
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Suggestion: Thus
...ken into account while doing the survey.Thus, without knowing the proper information...
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Line 9, column 407, Rule ID: CANT[1]
Message: Did you mean 'can't' or 'cannot'?
Suggestion: can't; cannot
...about survey done in both the places we cant assure that regular health checkups is ...
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Line 11, column 8, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
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...t preventing the tooth decay. Clearly,then we need to have additional evidence in ...
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Suggestion: We
...he strengths and weaknesses of argument.We need to know about the extent of survey...
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Suggestion: And
...he oral hygiene of two groups of people.And we really need more information if we w...
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Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...on if we want to extend the results that regular dental care is not helpful in pr...
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Transition Words or Phrases used:
actually, but, conversely, finally, first, firstly, however, if, may, really, so, then, therefore, thus, whereas, while, for example, in fact

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 19.0 19.6327345309 97% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 22.0 12.9520958084 170% => OK
Conjunction : 9.0 11.1786427146 81% => OK
Relative clauses : 10.0 13.6137724551 73% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 40.0 28.8173652695 139% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 67.0 55.5748502994 121% => OK
Nominalization: 12.0 16.3942115768 73% => OK

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2382.0 2260.96107784 105% => OK
No of words: 465.0 441.139720559 105% => OK
Chars per words: 5.12258064516 5.12650576532 100% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.64369019777 4.56307096286 102% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.92499998765 2.78398813304 105% => OK
Unique words: 218.0 204.123752495 107% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.468817204301 0.468620217663 100% => OK
syllable_count: 740.7 705.55239521 105% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.59920159681 100% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 9.0 4.96107784431 181% => OK
Article: 3.0 8.76447105788 34% => OK
Subordination: 1.0 2.70958083832 37% => OK
Conjunction: 2.0 1.67365269461 119% => OK
Preposition: 6.0 4.22255489022 142% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 6.0 19.7664670659 30% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 77.0 22.8473053892 337% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively long.
Sentence length SD: 56.7450438364 57.8364921388 98% => OK
Chars per sentence: 397.0 119.503703932 332% => Less chars_per_sentence wanted.
Words per sentence: 77.5 23.324526521 332% => Less words per sentence wanted.
Discourse Markers: 23.5 5.70786347227 412% => Less transition words/phrases wanted.
Paragraphs: 6.0 5.15768463074 116% => OK
Language errors: 31.0 5.25449101796 590% => Less language errors wanted.
Sentences with positive sentiment : 2.0 8.20758483034 24% => More positive sentences wanted.
Sentences with negative sentiment : 4.0 6.88822355289 58% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 0.0 4.67664670659 0% => More facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.112364890025 0.218282227539 51% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0616134853352 0.0743258471296 83% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0410201615146 0.0701772020484 58% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0616134853352 0.128457276422 48% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0410201615146 0.0628817314937 65% => OK

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 41.4 14.3799401198 288% => Automated_readability_index is high.
flesch_reading_ease: -6.68 48.3550499002 -14% => Flesch_reading_ease is low.
smog_index: 13.0 7.1628742515 181% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 33.3 12.197005988 273% => Flesch kincaid grade is high.
coleman_liau_index: 13.6 12.5979740519 108% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 10.75 8.32208582834 129% => OK
difficult_words: 97.0 98.500998004 98% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 29.0 12.3882235529 234% => Linsear_write_formula is high.
gunning_fog: 32.8 11.1389221557 294% => Gunning_fog is high.
text_standard: 13.0 11.9071856287 109% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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Rates: 66.67 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 4.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.

Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 3.5 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 8 15
No. of Words: 490 350
No. of Characters: 2320 1500
No. of Different Words: 216 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.705 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.735 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.356 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 175 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 110 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 67 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 32 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 61.25 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 32.244 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.75 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.47 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.799 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.272 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 6 5