To serve the housing needs of our students, Buckingham College should build a number of new dormitories. Buckingham's enrollment is growing and, based on current trends, will double over the next 50 years, thus making existing dormitory space inadequate. Moreover, the average rent for an apartment in our town has risen in recent years. Consequently, students will find it increasingly difficult to afford off-campus housing. Finally, attractive new dormitories would make prospective students more likely to enroll at Buckingham."
Write a response in which you discuss what specific evidence is needed to evaluate the argument and explain how the evidence would weaken or strengthen the argument.
The director indicates in the memo that new housing facilities need to be built in order to fulfill the future demands. However pieces of evidence need to be given before making final call.
The memo indicates that Buckingham's enrollment is increasing and students will double over 50 years. However, this seems not so urgent to build dormitories since enrollments only increase 2 percent each year. Building housing for students seems to be a waste of the college budget. The director should provide evidence to show that whether the capacity of the dormitories is full or not. If the evidence shows that housing is currently full and cannot support another 2 percent increase of students. Then the director should take immediate action to build housings.
Senior students tend to live outside campus for more independent lifestyle while college freshmen prefer o live on campus since they are not quite familiar with their surroundings.
Therefore, dormitories might have extra space after senior students left and can still support the enrollment students. However, if this is not true, there might be a need to build new student housings. The director should provide evidence that whether senior students will leave school and live own their own.
The director points out that it might be a barrier for students to find housing in town due to the rising apartment rents. However, it might be possible that Buckingham's college is full of rich students whom can still afford high rents and prefer to live outside the campus. Also, students who are living with their parents will not be affected by the rising price. The director needs to provide evidence such as arranging a survey to find out whether finding apartments is difficult for students.
Finally, the director's view that students will be attracted to their college by judging their dormitories is narrow. Education quality, scholarships, prominent professors and staff are also considerations for students when picking their college. Therefore, evidence needs to be provided to show the preferences of students toward selecting college whether dormitory is their first consideration.
The director should provide evidence mentioned above before making the decision to build more student housing.
Comments
Essay evaluation report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 3.5 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 20 15
No. of Words: 359 350
No. of Characters: 1867 1500
No. of Different Words: 170 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.353 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.201 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.6 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 149 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 117 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 76 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 36 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 17.95 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 4.295 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.65 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.347 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.613 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.066 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 7 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 121, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: However,
...in order to fulfill the future demands. However pieces of evidence need to be given bef...
^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, finally, first, however, if, so, still, then, therefore, while, such as
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 20.0 19.6327345309 102% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 18.0 12.9520958084 139% => OK
Conjunction : 7.0 11.1786427146 63% => OK
Relative clauses : 11.0 13.6137724551 81% => OK
Pronoun: 20.0 28.8173652695 69% => OK
Preposition: 44.0 55.5748502994 79% => OK
Nominalization: 12.0 16.3942115768 73% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1927.0 2260.96107784 85% => OK
No of words: 359.0 441.139720559 81% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.36768802228 5.12650576532 105% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.35284910392 4.56307096286 95% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.65032670732 2.78398813304 95% => OK
Unique words: 175.0 204.123752495 86% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.487465181058 0.468620217663 104% => OK
syllable_count: 575.1 705.55239521 82% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.59920159681 100% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 2.0 4.96107784431 40% => OK
Article: 8.0 8.76447105788 91% => OK
Subordination: 2.0 2.70958083832 74% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 1.67365269461 0% => OK
Preposition: 0.0 4.22255489022 0% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 20.0 19.7664670659 101% => OK
Sentence length: 17.0 22.8473053892 74% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 27.9576018285 57.8364921388 48% => The essay contains lots of sentences with the similar length. More sentence varieties wanted.
Chars per sentence: 96.35 119.503703932 81% => OK
Words per sentence: 17.95 23.324526521 77% => OK
Discourse Markers: 3.85 5.70786347227 67% => OK
Paragraphs: 7.0 5.15768463074 136% => Less paragraphs wanted.
Language errors: 1.0 5.25449101796 19% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 8.0 8.20758483034 97% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 5.0 6.88822355289 73% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 7.0 4.67664670659 150% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.185945200902 0.218282227539 85% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0712417019023 0.0743258471296 96% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0535401369872 0.0701772020484 76% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0974101694938 0.128457276422 76% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0632415984809 0.0628817314937 101% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 12.8 14.3799401198 89% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 54.22 48.3550499002 112% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 7.1628742515 43% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.9 12.197005988 81% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 13.57 12.5979740519 108% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.82 8.32208582834 94% => OK
difficult_words: 76.0 98.500998004 77% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 7.0 12.3882235529 57% => Linsear_write_formula is low.
gunning_fog: 8.8 11.1389221557 79% => OK
text_standard: 10.0 11.9071856287 84% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Maximum six paragraphs wanted.
Rates: 50.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.